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I think this is a good way to get in the habit of saving — rather than have only a set amount be saved, have your set amount and anything that doesn’t get spent in your regular budgets.

But we also have an agreement that neither of us will spend over $50.00 from the common funds without discussing the matter with the other beforehand (if humanly possible) or as quickly thereafter as circumstances permit.

Yes … if the car bails out many miles from home, you can call the towing company and get relief. But you can’t keep quiet about it. This is so that the other partner does not also try to access the same funds. It is based on simple courtesy toward each other.

The intent is that each should have sufficient funds to act as an independent human being, but that larger expenses should come from the “holdings in common”.

I suppose that, technically, that means that we have room to be somewhat wasteful … but what is money for if not to enjoy it? Having an allowance puts a reasonable upper cap and allows each of us to save for larger expenditures (last winter I held on to mine until I had enough for a 3.5 hp router, then charged it and was able to pay for that charge when the bill came).

This system works for us because it suits our joint temperament. Each couple needs to sit down and establish what will work for them. Possibly their circumstances and goals would permit of a larger allowance, perhaps a somewhat smaller one is in order. The key, though, seems to arrive at a number that both can agree on yet won’t break the bank. We, living in Michigan, actually find that sum somewhat generous. In NYC or Washington, DC things would likely need to be adjusted.

There is no good reason why a single person should not adopt an allowance system, too. Many years ago, when I had buried myself so deep that I doubted whether I would ever be able to come out of it I adopted an allowance system for myself and, just a few years later, was able to emerge essentially debt free.
So I celebrated by getting married.

For people with J.D.’s system, do you discuss how much to contribute to retirement savings, essentially leaving both people with an allowance anyway?

All those questions are to say, for us, allowance is the easiest way around it all. It’s really just another way of paying yourself first. Every payday we pay savings first, fund the account for joint expenses next, and the rest is fun money.