How to Eat at a Swanky Restaurant Without Blowing Your Monthly Food Budget
Published on - October 12th, 2007 (by J.D. Roth) Kris and I joined some friends last weekend for a 40th birthday celebration at Bluehour, a swanky Portland restaurant. While the other couples spent $150 to $250 for their meals, we escaped paying only $52, including tip. We hadn’t planned to do this, but our unintentional parsimony taught us a few ways to save the next time we dine out at a fancy restaurant:
- Eat a healthy snack before you go to take the edge off your hunger. Kris often does this — I do not. It enables her to look at a menu and order reasonably. I, on the other hand, get carried away when I feel ravenous, and order too much.
- Order something that takes time to eat. Some foods — such as pasta — are easy to eat. You can scarf them down quickly. At Bluehour, we ordered a couple of fiddly things: a cheese fondue and a plate of cheeses, olives, and meats. While everybody else was finished with dinner, we were still working on ours. Eating slowly allows you to reach a feeling of fullness.
- Order appetizers as your meal. We’ve begun to do this more often. Last weekend’s fondue and cheese plate were considered appetizers, but they were delicious and filling. The fondue for two with artisan bread and apples cost just $12. An alternative on the menu was six-bites-worth of bacon-wrapped scallops for $16. The scallops would definitely be an appetizer, while the fondue could actually serve as a meal.
- Watch what you drink. We each had one cocktail on Saturday. They were expensive: $10 each. (It was a very swanky place.) Imagine how quickly our expenses would have increased if we’d had more than one drink. Better yet, imagine how much we could have saved if we’d only had water. Decide which you’d enjoy more: a cocktail starter, a glass of wine with dinner, or perhaps dessert and coffee. Choose one rather than splurging on all three.
- Order in sequence. If the restaurant will allow, order and eat your appetizer before you place your order for an entree. If, as is usual, you order everything at the same time, it’s easy to order more food than you need. Be patient if you try this technique, the kitchen will need time to prepare your entree once the order has been placed. (Also consider increasing your tip if you order in sequence — you’re displacing the table for a longer period of time.)
- Share food. At Gino’s, our favorite restaurant, the portions are enormous. Splitting an entree gives us enough food for two. Many restaurants charge an extra few bucks for doing this, but it’s much less than paying for a second unnecessary entree. At Bluehour we were able to share our food without extra charge.
- Take food home. An excellent way to stretch your restaurant dollar is to actually plan to take home leftovers. Kris and I have done this for years, yet I don’t know how wide-spread the practice is. If you do this, keep it in mind when browsing the menu; some foods keep and reheat much better than others.
- Skip (or share) dessert. I’ve heard of people keeping a bar of dark chocolate (or other sweet treat) in their purse or car. Often, you crave just a bite or two of something sweet — so satisfy that craving on your way home. Or, if you can agree on a choice with your dinner companions, split a dessert.
Many of the same tips for saving money at a restaurant will also help to keep your calories in check. Restaurant portions are huge. There’s nothing worse than blowing both the budget and your waistline, only to be filled with regret later. By making smart choices to split meals, skip courses and limit alcoholic or sugary beverages, you can relish the experience while keeping your frugal self-respect.
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This article is about Food, Frugality, Hints and Tips
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Daniel-
The problem with your thoughts- and the general server “categorization” of diners- is that it tends to become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
My husband and I, while professionals (and previous servers), look like college students. This particular group is almost always looked down upon as “bad tippers” which is not helped by our ordering habits, as sometimes all we want is apps and water.
The problem in this case is that, as former servers, we are more than happy to tip upwards of 70 to 80% for fabulous service, and have several times over the last six years we’ve been together (although 30-40% is where we tend to settle). However, if we’re completely ignored (which has happened more times than I care to count) we are also more than happy to cover what we imagine the tip-out of a table will be, and not a penny more. (We’ve mostly heard 3%, which goes to bartenders and hosts, for those not familiar- which is why leaving 2 cents or nothing at all is particularly mean- you’re making the server pay for the privilege of serving you. However, we also tend to eat at steak houses, so don’t worry about lecturing me on the tip-out procedures at fancy restaurants.)
The problem, as you can see, is that by assuming the outcome and giving bad service (or noticeably less than stellar), the servers are only creating the very atmosphere they have assumed will happen. And by leaving an appropriate tip for their level of attention, we’re only enforcing their beliefs.
Of course, we always try to speak with a manager in certain cases- but I’m sure we both know that doesn’t do much good. The wait staff I’ve known and endured were very much an “in-one-ear” group, and not predisposed to changing the racist and ageist assumptions that they’ve developed and cling to like a security blanket.
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I’ve never heard of a restaurant refusing separate cheques! How annoying. I live in Canada though. When I go out for a meal with 20 colleagues, we get separate cheques without even asking for them, just as a matter of course. And often when I go out with my husband we are asked if we want separate cheques.
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[...] at get rich slowly, JD has written a post about eating out at swanky restaurants. Its quite interesting if you want to take a look, but what’s caught my attention was part of [...]
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@Monica:
Where I live (NC, USA), it is common for a restaurant to refuse separate checks for parties of 6 or more.
PS – there are 2 “Daniel”s on here – perhaps one of us should use a different moniker.
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Great tips! I regularly have dinner with a friend who drinks a bit (I don’t drink), and so we deduct the cost of the drink(s) then split the rest of the cost (we usually eat similarly priced entrees) and he throws in a few more bucks for the extra tax/tip.
Another thing is in NYC they have Restaurant Week where expensive well-known restaurants will offer a prix-fixe for some pre-arranged price (this year it was 20.07) — you have to make reservations a bit ahead of schedule, but it’s a great way to try some of these restaurants that don’t fit my eating out bill, and you get the full appetizer, entree, dessert.
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DH and I have often noticed that an appetiser and drinks would be enough for us (usually after we ate the appetiser and are full but still waiting for the entree) We’ve decided that if we return to restaurants where we noticed this, we’ll get drinks and apps at the bar to leave a table open for full meals.
About sharing bills, I won’t go out to dinner with people other than my DH unless we are being treated by family or we are treating someone else. It’s just too annoying. I order very little and would get the evil eye when I wanted to pay my share only.
I was in a club that rotated meetings at area restaurants, I quit the club b/c of this silly check splitting business.
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Just went out last night to a very nice steak place. The waiter asked us if we wanted the check together or separate.
Last week we went out for a retirement party with over 20 something people and we had 12 separate checks! Before we got in, it was discussed that the server would be tipped graciously. We personally gave 40% tip. We didn’t order a huge meal, we split and entree and had a large sampler appetizer. Others had a full meal. Waitress was happy and we had a great time with our food.
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[...] JD has some clever ideas for saving money at swanky restaurants. [...]
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I am quite frugal, but i think that when going out to eat one should eat as much as one likes and truly enjoy it, rather than worry about saving (too) much money. I like to enjoy everything about the restaurant- ambience, drinks, entrees, desserts.
For Daniel- your attitude is awful. I was a server, years ago, and hated the job. I respect anyone who can do it well and with a smile on their face. I tip well. However, it is not your job to judge the customers based on what they eat and how much money you perceive you will make. They are not there to ensure you make the maximum amount of money. Plus, you never know- that couple eating appetizers and drinking water might tip well, and the couple ordering expensive meals might be tightwads who don’t respect the service and tip poorly.
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I might use all of this advice when having to go to a chain or mid-range restaurant, a local place we go often, or an unknown quantity. But for my definition of swanky – world class, well regarded, big city places – we always plan to enjoy ourselves to the fullest. It’s one of those “life’s too short” issues, but I know that not everyone values food and drink like we do.
A number of people have mentioned “friends” who shirk on the split bill, or don’t leave their share of the tip and just shrug. Which has happened to me too. That speaks volumes to me about the type of person they are. And they won’t be dining with me again.
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[...] Get Rich Slowly is eating well -but he’s not spending a lot of money – Eating Out While Saving Money. [...]
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[...] JD tells us how to eat fancy without blowing the budget. [...]
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I’m a professional server, and I love dining out. I don’t have a problem with any of the ideas JD mentioned. In fact, they are all perfectly fine at my restaurant (and I work at the classiest restaurant in my area). Yes, it can be expensive, but you can have the experience without the huge price.
The only other tip I would add is to ‘make your situation known to the staff.’ If it’s your prom night, and you only have $100 for dinner, talk to the person handling your reservation. Are you new in town and just want to check us out? Cool, I can even tell you about my favorite after-dinner bar. Do you have a party of twenty that will all need separate checks? Make that point when making your reservation, so that management and your server will have a heads up (and you ARE making a reservation if you have twenty people all needing separate checks, RIGHT???) This all saves the embarrassment of trying to handle it without your dinner companions knowing, flustering your server, etc. We do this all the time for corporate parties, which are the bulk of our business. There are actually companies whose function is to set up these reservations…and what they do is ask questions about prices and the menu, follow a budget per person/per party, and handle the billing. Our reservation sheet will actually have notations for the servers that say things like “$100 per person MAX (and we know that means tax and tip, too), no lobster, house wines only, no features, $500 minimum” etc. If it’s good enough for Merck and EdwardJones, why not you?
No one at my restaurant has a problem with splitting apps, salads, entrees, or desserts. We’ll even plate them separately in the kitchen, so that it comes out looking like a regular portion. It helps me out when guests tell me their price range on a wine, so I’m not wasting all our time with too expensive bottles. You don’t have to be obnoxious about it (‘whoa, look at these prices!’), just communicate effectively.
Thanks to all you great tippers out there! I appreciate that you realize that it’s just as much work to carry out coffee as it is a steak (actually more work at my place, because the kitchen plates the steak, but I have to brew the coffee, warm the cup, heat the cream, and plate it
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Great post. My husband and I have used some of these tools.
For example, our favorite restaurant near our home is a high end restaurant where you could easily spent $100+ per person if you factored in drinks, appetizers, entrees and dessert (it is comparable to a Ruth’s Chris’s–actually it used to be a Ruth Chris, but then was bought by a private owner). Fortunately, occassionally there are some gift certificates available on restaurant.com. We stocked up on the certificates during a 60% off sale at restaurant.com, so we were able to get $25 certificates for $4. The minimum purchase is $35 to use the gift certificate. We have figured out several menu variations, through combinations of appetizers, soups, salads, split entrees etc., that total $35-40. After the gift certificate we paying about $20-25 out of pocket including taxes and a 20% tip for a meal that is far superior to what you could get for $20 at any chain restaurant and a much more enjoyable atmosphere/ambiance.
We still try to limit our eating out, but if we’re going to, we’d rather carefully plan a meal at a nicer restaurant than to waste our dining dollars at a run-of-the mill chain.
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Hi
I’ve always been curious about how the tip percentage should be calculated. In South Africa (where I stay) we used to tip 10% but over the years the percentage has increased to 15% 20% etc. My question is why this should be so if the restaurant is already increasing their prices on the food and beverages served as this means that the server receives an “increase” whenever the establishment’s prices change?
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[...] Eating at an expensive restaurant: JD @ Get Rich Slowly recently posted an article about how to eat at an expensive restaurant without destroying your food budget. Although the article makes some valid points on how to reduce your bill, it’s really not for [...]
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I have to agree with those who’ve said that servers assumptions create a self-fulfilling prophecy. I often go out with girlfriends, and we just can’t eat much, we’ll often share something. The bill will be low, trust me, but we have all worked service before and understand the work, and how hard it is and thus we do tip well, often >20%, especially if our bill is on the low side.
What I’d like to know is, how to communicate that to the waitstaff at the start of the meal? I mean, I know the old saw about the guy who calls himself a “big tipper” but only leaves a couple of bucks, so I don’t want to say something which might backfire.
I guess what it comes down to is, don’t make assumptions. Don’t assume the family will tip badly, or the two ladies together or the woman dining alone. Give us the benefit of the doubt and the good service.
Good tips!
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As an ex-waitress, to be honest, you do judge people on how much they spend. That’s just a fact whether you like it or not. But it’s just one of the criteria along with their general attitude and so forth. And unless a patron is being a real dick, the judgement consists more of fleeting thoughts rather than a deeply held opinion you consciously act on.
Having the attitude that people should only eat out if they plan to spend heaps of money is just as bad as the attitude that servers exist to serve only and should shut up & be opinion-free, both of which appear to be getting an airing.
I do think that going to a fine dining restaurant and being frugal is contradictory and counter-productive – sorry JD. That’s like going to a funfair, riding the carousel only and avoiding the rollercoasters to save money.
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Great tips! We use restaurant.com for great deals on nice places we wouldn’t ordinarily go. It makes a big difference to get the the price of an entree (or more) shaved right off the top of the bill. We’re pretty big on leftovers too; why just have dinner when you can have dinner AND lunch (or breakfast)? All in all, I think there are smart ways to go to a fancy place without overspending.
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[...] How to Eat at a Swanky Restaurant Without Blowing Your Monthly Food Budget Get Rich Slowly gives some tips to lower costs of eating out. [...]
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[...] Rich Slowly tells us how to eat at a “swanky” restaurant without blowing the budget. He also writes about how to escape from minimum [...]
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If I spend less on food, I can afford to tip more. There you have it, waitstaff. If I can’t afford to tip nicely, I don’t eat out or I do fast food.
But if you treat me like crap because I didn’t spend much–you may be getting a very sorry little tip. Not because I’m a cheapskate but because you did a godawful job of it (and it has to be pretty bad for me not to leave at least 15%, which is what I leave for mediocre service).
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[...] article on the Get Rich Slowly blog caught my attention recently. It was entitled How to Eat at a Swanky Restaurant Without Blowing Your Monthly Food Budget, and it gave 8 tips for saving money when dining out. To summarise, these [...]
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I’ve been reading this blog for a while and wanted to add something. A lot of bars and restaurants have special nights where drinks and sometimes food are a lot cheaper. I run a site for Baltimore, MD residents that keeps track of all the current specials, happy hours and the like. If you stick to the special and don’t order extra stuff, this is a great way to save some money!
http://www.baltimorespecials.com
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“The wait staff I’ve known and endured were very much an “in-one-ear” group, and not predisposed to changing the racist and ageist assumptions that they’ve developed and cling to like a security blanket.”
Sadly, as one of my coworkers pointed out, they are stereotypes because they are true. While I treat everyone the same (not EVERY person in a particular group is a poor tipper), it isn’t unrealistic for people to come up with an assumption when a particular outcome results 85% of the time. It doesn’t have anything to do with the service in general, just the person’s perception of what an acceptable tip is.
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I refused to go out with a particular friend. She does not cook, so she eats out consistently. We take turns in paying the bill, but she normally would order the entire menu from several alcoholic drinks in addition to another beverage such as sweet tea, to an appetizer, to a dinner entree to dessert. I, on the other hand, is a light eater and is satisfied with just water (I don’t drink alcohol or sodas) and an appetizer or a small entree. In the end, her meal cost about $60 whereas mine only cost $25. This friend makes over $100,000, which is considerably much higher than my salary, but expects me to pay her meals. Cheap bastard!
By the way, just because I order water and a small meal (I eat light) doesn’t mean I’m a bad tipper. In fact, I tip well when the service is great.
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I love to eat out. My husband and I save money by doing a few things. We eat out for lunch instead of dinner and we eat at ethnic restaurants which tend to be cheaper. I think that if you’re eating with “friends” that expect you to cover their $100 meal and you only had $30 meal then they aren’t your friends. Also I hate rude servers. If I go to a restaurant where the server is rude I’m not going to tip you and if the restaurant is willing to do something simple as split a check for me I won’t return. And all those waiters I usually order the cheaper dish so I know I HAVE enough money for your tip! I always figure out tip when I’m ordering so don’t assume I’m not going to tip you. If I don’t tip you it’s because you’re rude or you ignore my table.
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I have a friend who was a server in a high end restaurant. A big group of us were together Apres Ski for drinks. The first time the server came to our table to take our orders Jess handed her several bucks. This was an indication that the more she came to our table to serve us the more she would make. I have never gotten better service. “Tips” means “to insure prompt service”. I can’t think of a better way to do that than to start out at the beginning.
Oklagirl has a lot of great ideas also.
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me and my daughter eat out every day because i dont cook i leave a tip when approprate to do so because i dont want to come next time and get less then best service on the other hand i thank if it is reall bad service and you did not get the attention to your table that was need you should not tip and not eat there again that just my oppenion and i eat out alot and not a mcdonalds either
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@ Daniel (#50)
Tell me about the special wine and maybe I WILL give you a big tip because it was so tasty.
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If you know you take leftovers home often, I suggest bringing your own tupperware. I have a nifty tupperware container that can collapse. I keep it in my purse when we go out to dinner, and I can then pack up leftovers. It doesn’t save any money, but it does save a bit of trash. I also find my tupperware is less likely to leak than cheaper takeout containers, and that does save me time.
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