The Unbranded Kid: Thoughts on Marketing to Children
Published on - November 5th, 2007 (Modified on - November 7th, 2007) (by J.D. Roth) Kris and I are childless by choice. We love our friends’ kids, but we’ve elected not to have any of our own. As a result, we’ve never had to face the financial challenges that come with parenting. One topic our friends often discuss is the marketing barrage children face from infancy onward.
“Even diapers are branded,” one friend told us recently.
“Especially diapers,” said her husband.
This is no accident. Marketers know that forging brand identity early can lead to enormous profits in decades to come. Dora the Explorer, Bob the Builder, and Thomas the Tank Engine may seem innocuous — and on their own they probably are — but as part of a larger marketing engine, they’re perfect tools for teaching kids to become consumers.
Andrea recently sent me an article from The Tyee, a newspaper out of British Columbia. In this piece, Colleen Kimmett writes about the challenges to raising a brand-free kid. Though the article seems to lack focus, Kimmett makes some good points:
Licensed characters are huge moneymakers for companies. In 2005, Winnie the Pooh earned Disney $6.2 billion in retail sales, according to Gregory Thomas, second only to the mouse.
[Mother Angela] Verbrugge believes all of this merchandising is the real problem, not necessarily the characters themselves. “They’re trying to sell kids other products, from clothing to bedding…there always needs to be something else that they’re striving to buy,” she says. “It scares me when I see advertisements that showcase all these different products that show the child being engaged with a toy,” she says.
Parents want their children to be happy. If a Thomas the Tank Engine playset is going to make your son beam, that can be difficult to resist.
Verbrugge says, “I think we’re seen as consumers…how much wallet share do kids have, and how much can they influence our spending.”
[...] Finding the balance between what their kids want, what they need and what’s available is difficult, say these parents. And they are the first to admit they are by no means perfect. “The only thing we can really do is in our home environments, in the environments we choose for our children,” says Verbrugge.
But as is so often the case, it can actually be more expensive for parents to follow their principles than to give in and embrace normalcy. In a way, the branded characters subsidize the products needed to raise children.
Resisting the urge to spend for the sake of convenience or pleasure is difficult for parents as well (especially when toting around a baby or toddler). And, as all the parents pointed out, often the “best” choices — natural wooden blocks or organic hemp clothing — are also the most expensive.
“The most challenging thing about making an effort to not brand your child in what they wear, or play with…is the fact that sometimes there aren’t choices and sometimes the choices are economically out of reach,” says [one mother].
Things become even more complicated once children enter school. There they are exposed to branding and advertising in the most insidious of ways: peer pressure. Older kids, especially, feel the need to identify with particular brands in order to fit in with a particular social group.
Ultimately, Kimmett’s article offers no solutions. What solutions are there? Unless you want to raise your kid in a cave, they’re eventually going to be exposed to marketing and branding. The best a parent can hope to do is raise their children to think independently, and to demonstrate through their own behavior that branded is not always better.
To learn more on this subject, I’ve borrowed Buy, Buy Baby: How Consumer Culture Manipulates Parents and Harms Young Minds by Susan Gregory Thomas from my public library. I hope to review it here soon.
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When my daughter was about five years old, she spotted a display rack in the grocery store that had disposable cameras printed with Disney’s “Aladdin” on the box. She immediately started asking me to buy one, because she “needed” it. I asked her whether it took better pictures because of having the character on the box, and she eventually admitted that it probably didn’t.
We’ve used the grocery store for lots of branding lessons, especially when the kids were into macaroni and cheese and so many different cartoon characters appeared in pasta shapes. We looked at the boxes, checked out unit pricing, and tried to figure out whether it tasted better at twice the price just because the pasta was shaped like a cartoon character.
Parents need to be aware of their own branding habits; the kids will watch them like hawks. My husband and I are pretty brand-ignorant, and see nothing wrong with generics and store brands, so that has helped.
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Gimme a break. There is a happy medium when it comes to this. Especially with infants, toddlers, and preschoolers. There are affordable alternatives that minimize the branding and labeling. And, I don’t see anything wrong with an occasional brand based toy for our children. We just need to reign it in. Kid’s need probably half the toys parents tend to buy them, anyway. Our children are more joyful when we give them our time than with the latest, greatest, toy. Gosh, I don’t mean to sound like a scrooge, it’s just that I have worked in early childhood for over 20 years and this topic can frustrate me. It really isn’t about the child’s wants as much as the parent’s wants.
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Money and values: Shopping locally…
This post comes from J.D. Roth at partner blog Get Rich Slowly . There is more to personal finance than…
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This is a great resource for parents:
http://www.commercialfreechildhood.org/
It’s surprisingly one of the largest concerns I have as a parent. It’s brain pollution that I have to give them tools for dealing with, because we can’t avoid it (even as a tv free family!)
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One way to reduce the impact of branding on a child is to reduce their exposure to TV, especially things with commercials. Our friends just recently got cable and noticed that when they take their 4 year old to the store she wants more than she used to. Our daughter’s relatively content to look at the cool toys and move on (relatively). As a result, she has no idea why some toys are considered fun or cool and pretty much enjoys things based on their value.
I’ll also agree with Dawn – there is a happy medium to be found in all of this. Finding it – that’s the hard part.
I like Welmoed’s suggestion of using the grocery store, especially as children get older. While generics/store brands aren’t always the best value (or worth the savings), it’s still a good way to teach children a lesson on good spending practices.
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There probably isn’t an absolute solution, but what you’ve mentioned about teaching a child to think independently, and live by example should help significantly. I’m far from being a parent, but everything I’ve read and seen has shown me that the core in parenting is to impart the proper value to your children. I believe that when you build the proper foundation such as personal responsibility, self-discipline, etc. (and your child develops and builds upon these foundation), you wouldn’t even have to teach about a specific detail subject (even important matters such as money); at the end, they’d most likely be able to figure things out for themselves.
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I read this somewhere a while ago and I can’t remember exactly where to give it proper credit.
What you mentioned regarding the peer pressure and so forth is a true issue. Even if you do raise your child/ren in a ‘cave’ and protect them from every possible array of unnecessary necessities, they will learn about them from their playdate friends, their preschool classmates, and their school friends.
So there’s this dad and his child, who wanted licensed products all the time. Granted, his child was young so it would actually work, but he buys these sheets of stickers and whenever his child demands the license box he would sneak a little sticker on there and say “look, this one also has Elmo on it” (or whatever character) and then buys the generic box, with the sticker and all.
Personally I don’t think that’s the best solution and don’t use this, but one that some parents might prefer.
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I’m the mother of five children, and my solution has been to get rid of the television. I also homeschool, so my children don’t feel the peer pressure that most children are exposed to from a very young age. Yes, they interact with other children, but for some reason they just don’t care about brands or names, such as Elmo, Thomas, or whatever.
They do like Pooh, but that’s because of the books and movies. They’ve never asked for a Pooh product.
I guess I’m doing something right, but I’m not entirely sure what it is or whether other parents would necessarily get the same result.
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I was basically raised in a cave. My parents were hippie college professors who raised me and my brother on unprocessed foods, hand me down clothes and no t.v. I had so little exposure to marketing as a kid I had no knowledge of Barbie or other universal characters. It was a great way to be raised but there was a down side of not fitting in at school.
I think its more diffuclt these days to avoid marketing but if you cut out t.v. you probably have reduced marketing exposure by 97%.
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Yeah, Anne, I think we were doing well, too. TV free is a blessing. And home schooling is smart. I sent my oldest to school.
There was a Scholastic BOOK FAIR. Books=good, right? The VAST majority of books for sale were Bratz, Transformers, Spiderman, and other not-age-appropriate movie or tv based books. Even the ‘classics’ (Terabithia, Charlotte’s Web, Narnia) had the movie covers on them. I was floored. It’s other kids, but it’s also companies knowing where their demographic is and schools letting them in.
I’ve been seeing it almost like a company spilling toxic waste into my drinking water. I don’t want their trash in my water so they can make money. Likewise, I don’t want Scholastic’s trash in my kid’s school!
What I can’t decide is: “Should such marketing to kids be regulated, like pollution, or is it up to me to provide the gas mask/knowledge to live with it?” As a parent, obviously that will remain my job, but it also seems that such marketing should be kept out of schools as surely as you’d keep asbestos out of them!
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My parents raised me as a frugal child. I only got special toys for my birthday and christmas, unless I saved up my allowance to buy it. If I had saved enough, they would take me wherever and let me buy what I wanted.
I happened to love legos. So I would have to save up for the big models.
They’d even give me extra allowance if I did other chores.
So my parents taught me how to afford my wants. and how to save. And I never really cared that I didn’t have the in-things which changed every 6 months.
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In this country we are barraged by advertisements constantly, all day, every day. TV, radio, billboards, web sites. Everywhere you turn, there’s another ad.
Everyone with a product wants to make sure you want their product, whether you like it or not. Companies spend a great deal of money letting consumers know that they want something they might not have known even existed.
And it sickens me.
They go after children with this kiddie branding, and parents cave in.
Who makes the financial decisions in your household? You, or your children? Seriously. Think about that.
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Our young kids (3 & 6) like the branded stuff, because they like the shows, and see other kids with them, but we rarely buy them. They get a few hand-me-downs or gifts of branded stuff, and they enjoy them (Disney, Sesame Street, Dora). I don’t think it’s harmful for them to enjoy them, so long as WE don’t end up getting sucked into the whining cycle everytime they see something with a character on it. At the store, they ask for them, or say they want them (a Dora backpack, for example), or just say it’s cool. I’ve found that I can pretty much derail whining or pleading by acknowledging the feeling, but never even hinting that a purchase might occur. My usual phrasing is “I can see where you would like that. Could you put that back, please?”
As far as branded stuff at the grocery store, we buy very little prepared food or junk food, and so there aren’t many “branded” foods in the produce, canned goods, dairy, or baking aisle; nor in the bulk section of the natural foods store. After years of repetition, my kids rarely ask for anything off the list (…more than once…). Yes, I occasionally have to remind them that we aren’t buying a certain kind of crackers because “Elmo really isn’t IN the box, just ON the box”.
Having a DVR that the kids tend to watch their recorded shows on has helped a LOT with ad avoidance. Most PBS shows only have “sponsor messages” at the beginning and end of the program. (Helps me avoid a lot of ads, too!)
I vividly remember when I figured out that the ads weren’t about making my life better, me cooler, or whatever, but that some company out there had stuff to sell, and the commercials were trying to convince me to do something that I maybe shouldn’t be doing (buying). I figured it out after buying a lot of junk. About once a week or so, I talk to my son about commercials and buying and saving and making choices — right around the time he gets his allowance ($2/week). I have to say the allowance has also greatly reduced the “I wanna” whining, because I can give the choice back to him, IF he has the money for it. I hope he’ll figure out that commercials aren’t really about his best interests earlier than I did!
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Seeing as how most parents want to be seen as the Duke and Duchess of their subdivisions, I think it’s unrealistic to think that kids themselves aren’t going to have some image pursuits of their own … my wife and I just live in a typical middle-class suburban neighborhood, yet many people are driving Mercedes, BMW’s, Lexuses, etc. When most normal adults themselves are so hung up on image and status, how the hell can we expect little kids to be any different? I think the best thing we can do for kids is just keep them safe:
http://www.marshallbrain.com/cp/
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It’s good to see someone else has elected to remain childless. My DH and I have don’t want kids and you can’t imagine the comments we get from others.
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In their quest to be pure, many of the commercial free childhood folks in essence have become what they claim to hate – a brand unto themselves. There are few people more annoying than the ” I can’t believe you bought that for your child” crowd.
There is nothing inherently wrong with the concept of branding. They key is to teach your kids how to distinguish between real differences in products and the marketing fluff. Sometimes, the more expensive product is more expensive for a reason. It’s better made with higher quality materials.
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Avoid television!
Avoid television!
Avoid television!
It is probably not practical for most families to eliminate tv viewing altogether, but getting rid of cable made a huge difference for us. The Disney channel for one is designed to do one thing: sell to children. Thankfully, it’s been about six months since cutting cable and my child no longer requests to go to the Disney Store or the American Girl store in the mall.
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simple solution: don’t have cable. Then your kid can’t watch thomas the tank engine. problem solved. next.
of course, that means you’ll have to get a more expensive baby sitter than the rectangular cyclops in your living room.
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One of the biggest issues I have with branding is the tee-shirts advertising box stores or beer or television characters.
I home-schooled as well, but you still have to fight the battles. I made the decision to be a Disney free home, and a Barbie free home by the time my daughter was 2. It was tough but we did it.
The toy budget was spent on Lego and Playmobil and we still have those toys! But I never saw an ad for either of them. I just knew they were worth hours of fun! And I was right! We are still a pretty brand-free home!
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“In this country we are barraged by advertisements constantly, all day, every day. TV, radio, billboards, web sites. Everywhere you turn, there’s another ad.”
Do you live in a city? I live in a small town. I don’t have cable TV (by choice), there are no billboards at all, I don’t listen to the radio (mostly because radio here is worthless), we throw out snail mail with ads in it without even opening it, and I use an ad-blocker on the web (sorry JD).
You have choices. The default choice is to live a life filled with advertisements. I simply don’t subscribe to that.
The unintentional side-effect of this is that whenever I do go to a city, I usually ignore the ubiquitous advertisements and focus on the things we don’t have here: the cacophony of noise, the grime, and the sheer numbers of people out and about.
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I also very much noticed the Scholastic marketing machine Bryn mentioned. I have the extremely fortunate situation of having a library within a 5 minute walk from my home. So the excuses to not purchase the myriad of Dora books is very easy to avoid. We have a “No Bratz” household, so those ones are easy too. I’m also starting an allowance this month with a contract to have her Save a potion and keep track of her spending.
When we moved to our new home I made an executive decision to not hook up cable/satellite so we had no TV for the first few months. My S.O. has now given in and got rabbit ears which puts us to 3 channels. During the summer when we had no TV it’s been the best summer I can remember. We spent far more time outside, way more family time, never once was the sentence ‘just give me a while, my show is on’.
After the TV was cut off, I noticed an ENORMOUS decrease in the amount of begging and asking for these ‘necessities’ that the kids were being sold.
Now, my Son still has a Bob the Builder shirt, and my Daughter has a That’s So Raven book bag. I’m no stooge, but he needs clothes and she needs a book bag for school. If the price is within a few dollars of each other then I see no harm. I just make sure I point out that the reason she has this bag is because the price was similar, because the quality was similar, and then because she liked it better . . . In that order only.
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@Bryn –
Regarding the Scholastic book fairs, I don’t know how they are organized exactly, but my experience differed vastly from yours. My daughter’s school just had one last month, and while there was a fair amount of branded or tie-in stuff there, it was perhaps 10% of the what Scholastic supplied (and the poorest selling, btw, over the week of the fair). So, I wouldn’t be so quick to judge Scholastic harshly — overall they do a fairly good job providing a mix of titles that are good for kids to read. If your experience truly wasn’t a good one, you need to make that known to whoever organized the fair. Perhaps you can help organize the next one.
As for regulating advertising to kids — While I would love to live in a commercial-free world, I also know that regulations made “to protect the children” often reduce the parents (along with all other adults) to children as well. As a parent, some of the best things I can do to mitigate the influence of advertising on my kid have already been discussed here. However, I would also add that having real, age-appropriate conversations about what advertising is really about is perhaps one of the most effective things I’ve done with my daughter. Kids are smart — they can grok stuff like “commercials only care about getting our money” and “if I bought everything on TV we’d have no money to go on vacation” if it’s done in context and not spat at them out of frustration.
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I don’t have kids so I haven’t done this analysis myself, but I think I remember reading somewhere that belonging to a diaper service costs about the same as buying disposables. And that it’s far cheaper to go the cloth route if you launder them yourself.
Less money, no cartoon characters, and you have the peace of mind of knowing you aren’t putting all those diapers in a landfill. But people are all about convenience…
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I think this is kinda silly. Even if you don’t have a tv in your house your kids are going to see this stuff everywhere anyway unless you are holding your hand over their eyes! And also to asume that all the branded stuff is more expensive just plain isnt true. The diapers we by are not the generic (I’ve tried them and they leak) but the next cheapest brand happens to have Sesame Street characters on them. If they want to put Elmo’s face where my daughter poops, I coundn’t care less as long as they keep their price in my range.
I grew up with just as much TV and marketing as anyone else. We don’t need to hide our kids from it and pretend its not there – my mom just did this:
“Mom! Mom! Mom! Can I have this?! PLEASSSSEEEEEE!”
“Nope.”
She said that enough and I quit asking.
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I agree with JerichoHill, giving a kid an allowance and letting him make his own decisions is a good solution and it allows you to budget a portion of your income for your child as well. So if you’re grocery shopping and your child wants something name brand you could tell him he has to pay the difference between the generic product and what he wants.
You could also take your child thrift store shopping since he’ll probably get more bang for his bunk. Kids often get bored with the toys and books they have, they always want more. I don’t really blame TV, I think they’re just like that and you have to deal with it one way or another.
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Why aren’t you planning on having kids?
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Oh, one more comment, and this one will be sort of on topic even.
You know what I really can’t stand? I have two nephews that are about 5 and 7, and during the school year they are (or rather their school is) constantly sending me crap where the kid writes his name on a form, then some company fills in around it something like:
Hi ________ (uncle icup, written in child’s hand), This is ________ (nephew’s name written in) and I really want to get this T-shirt with some stupid cartoon character on it. If I sell enough of this truly worthless crap that nobody would buy if it wasn’t pimped by 7 year olds like me, they will give me this $2 T-shirt made in some sweatshop in the Dominican Republic. This stuff was literally picked out of garbage dumps and made into stationary, just so you can buy it at the low low price of $20. I will be the happiest kid ever if you buy it and I get my t-shirt, that you could probably just get at walmart anyway for about as much as this company is spending on postage to mail these things to all my relatives. But if you are too cheap to drop a Jackson on me, I might grow up emotionally stunted, but I’ll eventually understand, after enough therapy.
Love _______ (nephew’s name written in, perhaps cutely misspelled with a backwards R)”
Of course, I can’t remember what it says exactly, but that is the gist of it.
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//And that it’s far cheaper to go the cloth route if you launder them yourself.//
How much is your time worth? That’s a lot of a laundry you’ll be doing. That’s a lot of extra water and electricity. A lot of detergent being dumped into the water system, or septic tank. A diaper service has trucks driving around burning fossil fuels.
There is a lot more to the cost equation than simply the retail price tag. Bringing this back on subject, one of the ways branding reduces cost is to help the consumer quickly segregate his options based on personal needs and wants. If you want cheap transportation you don’t waste time visiting the Mercedes dealership. However, if you want a car that will last 200,000 or more miles, maybe you consider the higher up front cost of a ‘Benz. It’s all about having choices, and any government action to minimize choices “for the children” will have the reverse effect of raising costs for everybody.
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I’ve done some more thinking about this.
I want to make it clear that I don’t hold it against parents if they choose to purchase branded items. Why should I? My main concern is with the companies themselves who are marketing to children.
As I’ve written before, I believe that marketing and advertising are insidious forces working in our culture to undermine our volition. You can preach personal choice til the cows come home, but the fact remains that advertising and marketing work, and the way they work is to circumvent our choice. Or, rather, to lead us into choices that we otherwise would not make. Some people don’t have a problem with this. I do. I believe that that the consumerist mindset plays a huge role in leading people to debt.
So, my problem with advertising to children is that it encourages them to become consumers. The companies know this, too, which is why they’re willing to spend the money to do it.
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When my kids were little we subscribed to a magazine called Zillions which was produced by Consumer Reports. It appears to be online now, by subscription, but I couldn’t get into the site. It was fabulous – explaining in a funny, clever way all the ways marketers make products look good. Great education. You can apply the analysis when you look at TV commercials with your kids.
Gift giving is also very challenging. I’ve just posted “Ten Gifts Least Likely to End UP In the Landfill”, and none of them are branded, of course.
http://moneychangesthings.blogspot.com/2007/11/ten-kid-gifts-least-likely-to-become.html
Tomorrow I am going to post some of the worse gifts my kids received!
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Another television-free (three years) family here, and it has dramatically decreased the “gimmes” in our household…for the adults, too! Now when my children express an interest in something, I know it’s genuine.
As far as the public school fund-raising racket, I make a cash donation to the school. They keep 100%, and my house stays free of junk. Problem solved.
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Yeah, we’re almost TV-free. Most genuinely good stuff on TV will eventually come out on DVD, so we watch almost exclusively videos when we watch at all. And our kids are very unwhiny for branded stuff, as a result both of small exposure to advertising and of copying how unconsumerist we act.
The last thing kids need is never to be exposed to this as kids, because they’ll overreact the other way when they get big enough to make their own decisions. You never develop an immunity that way. Inoculation by small exposure is what’s required.
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I am with the get rid of the TV crowd. When we moved to the country, we told the kids there was no reception (which is true, though easy enough to get with a satellite dish) and thus, no need for a TV. Out it went, and as time went by, we were surprised to hear from the kids’ teachers about how much better the kids were doing at school! Since then, we’ve researched it quite a bit and learned about how damaging TV (and all forms of media) are to the developing brain. No loss there.
It also helps that our children attend a Waldorf school. The dress code specifically prohibits any obvious branding, which they feel distracts children from their studies.
No TV and a school community that minimizes branding exposure at school makes it much easier to keep our kids out of the grip of corporate marketing. When they get into high school, they will have a strong foundation of sense of self and, along with our guidance, be better prepared to withstand the onslaught.
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My solution has been really effective: My kids watch an hour or two of TV a week, tops. There is one show on PBS that my four year-old enjoys and watches maybe one of the four times a week that it is shown. We might watch Wheel of Fortune once a week. And the local sports, maybe. As a result (IMO), trips to stores are a quiet pleasure for me. My child walks right by the toys and doesn’t ask for any of them. We have blocks and Legos at the house that I bought at garage sales, as well as shelves of used books that my two girls can peruse at will. She recognizes characters, and we found Pooh bedding at a garage sale, but I can count on one hand the number of times that I have been asked to buy a certain brand of “thing,” and we only buy things when needed.
And when she goes to school, she’ll be going to a school with uniforms, which diminishes (but I admit does not eliminate) some peer pressure from the other kids.
Marketing is insidious, but your kids can avoid it the same way you do. Turn off the TV, read real books (magazines are mostly advertisements), and live a simple life focused on a more worthy goal than acquiring things. No is a word my kids hear often, followed by age-appropriate discussion about why. It’s difficult, but it can be done.
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Kids need to learn how to deal with this stuff, but just as you don’t teach a child to drive at age 5, I believe that children can wait to learn about dealing with media until they are more mature. One of the saddest things I see in the world today is that children are stripped of their innocence at such early ages. Such a mad rush to learn to read and write and deal with the real world when they really should be allowed to stay playing in their magical worlds longer. There is so much important physical, emotional and mental development occurring as a result of their imaginative play that gets lost in the rush to make them into little adults.
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“It really isn’t about the child’s wants as much as the parent’s wants.”
That is exactly right. It’s about our need to give our children the “best things.” (i.e. Branded things) Before we wonder about how our children are being manipulated, we’d better take a long hard look at ourselves….
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When I was a child when I demanded things in stores, my mother would say that I was suffering from the “gimmees.” It taught me that unbridled consumerism is a malady. I have seen people around me with kids spend entirely too much money on things just because Disney/whatever has put a character on it. Why? Sure, if something is irresistable give in occasionally. No one wants to live in a cave as an oddball.
But one of the best gifts my parents gave me and I think one of the best gifts you can give any child is the ABILITY TO THINK FOR THEMSELVES and to consciously avoid being manipulated by the media in whatever form they take. Then they we be freed from the compulsion to buy over-priced junk on credit cards and won’t have to learn those painful lessons later in life as they struggle to undo the hidden consumerist programming in their makeup in order to live more financially responsible lives.
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It’s not just kids. How many billions are spent each year on hair care products for pets? Does your dog care if he smells like lilacs? Actually, he probably rather not!
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Lilac shampoo for dogs? Who knew?
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@COD – I would like my dog to smell like lilacs.
However, I see your Lilac Dog Shampoo and raise you one Doggy Sleeping Bag for Doggy Sleepovers. I’m not kidding. That is a real thing you can go down to petco right now and pay $25 for. If anybody doesn’t know why this is a waste of money, I will give you a hint: dogs cannot work the zipper on a sleeping bag, and wouldn’t stay in it if they could.
I wish I could find it on the site, but I’ve only seen it in the store itself.
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We talk ad nauseum with our 6-year-old about commercials. So much so that at Target recently, she was looking at the robot pets (“fur real” cats, dogs, etc.) and even though she thought they were really cool, she immediately agreed with me that we don’t need one because we have a real dog.
Then my mother told me the other day that she already bought one for my daughter for Christmas. How to tell her that the kid doesn’t even want it, and for the hundredth time, we’d love a contribution to the college fund instead?
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@Cheap Like Me
Give up. Grandparents seem to hold some unalienable right to blow money on stuff they never would have bought you as a kid
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My kids watch some TV, but I generally rely on the old-fashioned “no you may not have it” approach. At this time of year I might say, “I’ll put that on your Christmas wish list” and so far the kids have never complained that a specific toy didn’t show up on Christmas day.
I’ve also started explaining the purpose of advertising and marketing to them. The seven-year-old sort of gets it, but the four-year-old hasn’t a clue yet. I’ll keep fighting the good fight.
Our rule at the bookstore, Scholastic book fairs, etc. is they can each pick a book that is NOT based on a TV show or movie. It’s okay if it was a book first, of course, or we would have missed out on Little House on the Prairie. Luckily our library has very few commercial books, so the kids get free choice there.
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“Kids need to learn how to deal with this stuff, but just as you don’t teach a child to drive at age 5, I believe that children can wait to learn about dealing with media until they are more mature.”
Here is the trouble with that, they don’t HAVE to drive at 5 . .. but they do have to deal with the constant bombardment from advertising. Every day they probably are told that they need to buy things over a hundred (maybe in the thousands) times. If you can cut this in half it’s far easier to teach self control and responsible spending.
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I can’t remember my childhood too horribly well, as far as this is concerned. I can certainly remember asking for things, but I can’t remember if I ever pursued them after a negative answer. I do know that I eventually ended up about the opposite of the ideal consumer, so I guess something was done right. In fact, while I don’t remember any lessons about not spending for branded products, I do distinctly remember once when my mother was buying mayonnaise, and she grabbed a name brand that was more expensive than the generics, which is what she would usually buy. When I asked about it, she simply said, “Sometimes, the extra money is worth it.” And that’s the lesson that I truly take to heart: Comparing an item’s PRICE to its VALUE. It’s only a bad buy if the first is higher than the second, not necessarily because there are cheaper (but also less valuable) options.
I do think that completely shielding children is not a correct course of action. Especially in marketing, where the strongest impulses, such as peer-pressure, only become stronger as the children age. Even into the college years, you merely have to read an article on binge drinking to know that peer-pressure still lives on. Even into the adult years, with “keeping with the Joneses” syndromes. It’s not something that goes away, and it’s not something that they’ll magically become equipped to handle if you shield them long enough.
The best way to handle it is to expose them to it, while at the same time giving them the tools to overcome it. I think the allowances is a great way to do this, since it gives the kids a great sense of the values of money and of saving, and forces them to make the decision of whether that item they want really has enough value to justify its price. By forcing the practice, it becomes a habit. My parents did this even in restaurants; not all the time, but if I wanted something more expensive than average. They would give a fair price point, and I could then add to that if I wanted something else. Or I could play within the budget, such as getting water instead of soda, so I had more for the entrée.
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I grew up in a household where both parents worked in marketing for multinational corporations, so I learned from a very early age the kinds of tricks that companies use to sell items and entice people to buy things. (One particularly insidious and utterly meaningless word is ‘fresh’, especially in the context of packaged food.) I grew up reading Zillions as well, and my parents and I used to watch the Super Bowl commercials purely to dissect what new gimmicks were popular in advertising that year.
Talking to kids about commercials is actually quite a good thing to do. If you help them pick apart a commercial for the latest toy or sugary snack, asking them why they think the item in question looks ‘cool’ or ‘yummy’, it’ll be a more memorable lesson than simply saying no. They might even feel like they’ve learned a secret, like they’ve managed to outsmart the people who are trying to make them buy something they didn’t want until just a few seconds ago.
And always remember this: if you remember the commercial but don’t remember the product being advertised, the commercial has essentially failed in its purpose.
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[...] The Unbranded Kid: Thoughts on Marketing to Children ? Get Rich Slowly (tags: parenting money) [...]
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I think I’ve done a fairly good job keeping my kids away from toys/food just because it has a character on it. I notice it a lot more since this spring – but maybe just because I started paying closer attention?
I hope I am able to keep doing whatever I am doing because at a recent birthday party the girl got nothing but Barbie items – and I mean everything was Barbie, the gifts, decorations, etc. My kids and one other girl gave her something different and she liked them but you could see she wanted something Barbie. What happens when she outgrows that phase?
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We give our son the option to buy the coveted brand item with his allowance. 99.9% of the time when we say, “You can buy it with your money,” he says, “Um … never mind.” The rest of the things (Legos, mostly) he saves up for. He purchased a Lego set recently with his own money and was happy as a clam. It’s a lot easier to spend someone else’s money.
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Our daughter became indoctrinated to the machine in preschool and Kindergarten, largely by the other children. It started innocently enough; the kids were allowed to bring things in for show-and-tell, or otherwise to comfort them while away from home and family. When the Barbies, Bratz and Polly Pockets started appearing in the Dora backpacks, competition for popularity started to rise. At home, things escalated because she was so worried about how she looked or what she would bring to impress the other kids, that we would leave each morning later and later, and of course tempers heated up. Also, the other girls were wearing pink miniskirts and similar skimpy attire, which likewise caused the gotta-have-it mentality in these youngsters. The toys, clothes, even the desire for blonde hair and thin bodies all became social currency for them (at ages 4-6!). Even after we changed course and stopped buying high-demand items, disallowed bringing toys and the like to school, etc., obviously the rest of the population in our child’s world was still watching cable TV and getting the goods. It was our fault for allowing her to be exposed so thoroughly, now we are having a very tough time teaching her not to be materialistic. Our daughter has come to believe that her things make her likable, and when she doesn’t have the props to hide behind, she feels like a complete loser who hates her life. Wish us luck!
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