“Golden Boy is Slowly Dying”
Saturday, 22nd March 2008 (by J.D.)This article is about Clothing, Frugality
In yesterday’s discussion about how to live frugally without looking like a loser, a few people chided me for wearing frayed clothing. MissPinkKate wrote, “Wearing a frayed sweatshirt isn’t a sign you’re frugal — it’s a sign you’re too lazy to buy cheap clothes that look nice, which can be done.” And Shirley said:
J.D., I promise I am not picking on you, really, but I laughed out loud when I read your comment that you “might” try to get rid of your ratty clothes over the next year. Come on.
You are a man who erased all your debt in three years, right? I think you can purge your ratty clothes and replace them by tasteful thrift shop finds in a couple of weeks at most. You don’t need a ton of clothes. Seriously, most of us end up wearing the same few pieces over and over again even though we tend to have closets full of clothes. You can do it, J.D.!
Even in your work-from-home state, you should be “dressing to the shoes” every day because we are all more productive when we are dressed to work. Words like “might” and “try” mean you’ve already made up your mind you are not going to do something. I know, I am guilty of using them at times just like everyone else.
“This is so true,” Kris told me. “I don’t think you have any intention of getting rid of your old clothes. I’ve tried to throw them out several times, but you always rescue them.” She’s right. For some reason, I can’t bring myself to purge my old clothes, even when they’re worn.
My favorite episode of Seinfeld (“The Marine Biologist”) begins with Jerry lamenting over the demise of his favorite shirt, Golden Boy:
“See this t-shirt?” he says to Elaine. “Six years I’ve had this t-shirt. It’s my best one. I call him Golden Boy. But see, look at the collar. It’s fraying. Golden Boy is slowly dying. Each step brings him one step closer.”
My wardrobe is filled with Golden Boys. The pajamas I’m wearing now are frayed at the waist. My socks have threadbare heels. And the sweatshirt I have on isn’t just frayed — there are holes torn into the seams.
My wardrobe hasn’t always been this run-down — when I was a spender, I bought new clothes all the time. But three years ago, as I began to take control of my money, I stopped buying clothes. Though I’ve purchased a few items since then, I’ve mostly made do with the things I already own. Now normal wear-and-tear has begun to take a toll. But somewhere in those three years, I must have moved from spender to tightwad. The idea of buying new clothes seems crazy — they’re so expensive!
Perhaps it’s time to strike a balance. I have $150 in Land’s End gift cards. There’s a good used clothing store near my home. I think it’s reasonable to purge some of the most run-down items from my wardrobe, give myself a budget, and buy a few pieces of quality clothing.
Otherwise, I run the risk of crossing the line from “frugal” to “slob”.
Do either of you sew? Not that it matters–there are always crafters looking for scraps to create with. That’s where my ratty clothes go–into a scrap cloth bin for projects. Even though I haven’t done much with them yet, it makes me feel better to know my Golden Boys can have a continued life.
Clothes used to be an expensive affair for me. I need to dress well for work. I used to spend at an average of 100-200 a month just on clothes. I just got sick of it. The worst is when you keep buying the same looking stuff anyway. I solved my problem now by wearing suits fashionably. They last longer, they can be mixed and matched, and to get creative I can always get something more affordable at TJ Max sales or during Target sales.
To keep them from fraying, some clothes should not be machine washed. I sometimes hand wash my clothes and hang them overnight to dry, then put it in the drier over low heat. Some argue that driers do reduce the life span of clothes, but it is difficult to get by without it.
Dressing well, knowing you look good and presentable helps in boosting your confidence and do better at the job. Worrying about it when you are talking to someone is the worst aversion you can have, especially when you are in the business of convincing someone. That is just my 2 cents worth!
maybe y’all could just drop all the judgemental labels; frugal, slob, loser. how much trouble do we as a society cause each other by being so judgmental of all the books covers??
i intentionally dress down, everyday. sharp, shiny dress is merely conspicuous or wanna-be wealth. the real ‘losers’ are anyone consuming beyond what is basically necessary.
My hunch would be that you’re backlashing against old habits - going from one extreme to the other to make sure you don’t start dipping back into your old ways. Understandable. But it’s a good point - you have achieved a major goal, and I think I’m right in saying you’ve forged the self-discipline needed not to go nuts at Brooks Brothers every weekend.
Update the threads, mate. Like you, I hardly ever buy clothes - and I especially hardly ever buy new clothes. We have lots of great second-hand stores in Eugene, and I also have an innate Capricorn sense of when things are on sale and I need them. It comes in handy
I buy a couple of articles of clothing a couple of times a year, and it’s mainly to update things that have worn out (and that get passed into the “working outside/on the house” pile.
Put your gift cards to use. Set a budget - maybe another $150, to match the gift cards - and raid a couple of thrift stores, Ross Dress for Less, and even a couple of mall stores (head straight to the sale rack). You’ll come out with a good combo on some dapper threads for when you need to snaz up a bit, and some great everyday stuff that you can score from the other stores.
As for the stuff that’s been completely worn out, you’ve got options.
- Freecycle it - crafty craftster types can repurpose old clothes into lots of stuff
- Use them as work clothes for the yard, garage, etc.
- Speaking of the garage, turn old threads into shop rags
But get some new clothes, you ragamuffin!
You should hang out at a Burger King and wait for Paris Hilton to go through drive-through. Ask her for $100 for new clothes. LOL
http://www.tmz.com/2006/09/20/paris-gives-up-a-benjamin/
Lands end clothes last at least 5 years. My husband got 12 dress shirts as a present 8 years ago, and some are just now fraying at the edges. He wears them 3 days a week to teach in. I get one pair of shoes from them every 2 years, and wear them daily for 3 seasons of each year. The Sam Vimes Boot Theory in action.
They do free shipping sometimes, just sign up for their emails. And the outlet section has been a great place to buy my husband’s suits for years.
I found that it was my white t-shirts I was keeping. So this year, for the first time, I made sure I had 8 new ones, and got rid of all the ratty ones. So you might want to just try to replace what you have. Because you already know you like it, that is why you kept it. You could set up a search on ebay. I frequently replace clothing that has gotten too big or too ratty that way. (all you people selling clothes on ebay, thank you!)
Figure out what your “uniform” is. Once I figured out that what I really wanted to wear was blue jeans, a white t-shirt and a sweater, I just stocked it and now getting dressed is easy. And looking at least presentable is easy because I don’t have to wade through ratty t-shirts looking for the nice one. If I want to upgrade my look, I just use a nicer sweater.
Last year, I got rid of all my Golden Boys, with the exception of two which were still usable.
Take a picture of each and let them go!
yes! Use those gift cards to get some high quality basics. The thrift is great for coats and stuff.
You might also try ebay.
I agree with Sal#3: let’s drop these judgmental labels. If new clothes make you feel better, then acquire them. Otherwise, who cares what other people think? Trying to meet the expectations of others is what leads us to consume, consume, consume.
It all comes back to what is important to YOU. If a frayed collar doesn’t bother you, don’t fix it. If you’re working from home and it doesn’t affect how your customers treat you, don’t worry about it.
The whole “dressed to the shoes” thing was developed by FlyLady to help chronically cluttered/out of control people to find structure in their lives. If that isn’t your issue, then it isn’t necessarily good advice.
JD, I admire (and read) you because you march to a different drummer and that drum led you right out of debt and the rat race! To thine own self be true. Do your own thang, wear your own thang.
T.J. Maxx is a great place to get high quality clothes cheap. But you have to look. This weekend I got a nice long-sleeve rugby shirt made by Polo for $10. It would sell for $95 at stores like Macy’s.
Also, I’ve purchased very nice suits at the Salvation Army Thrift store for $10-$15.
Sal and Louise have a good point: I normally try to avoid judgmental labels, but I got carried away in my attempt at humor.
The thing is, wearing these tattered clothes does both me some. It’s embarrassing to make a bad first impression because my clothes are in bad shape or don’t fit well. (My constantly fluctuating weight creates additional issues with my wardrobe — if I continue with my get fit slowly program, I’ll actually have a bunch of new clothes for free, because I paid for them years ago but never wore them.)
I think the solution is to purge the beat-up clothes and look for deals on high-quality replacements.
I’m curious about the eBay thing. Have people used eBay for clothes? How does it work? I’m not a smoker, and I worry about getting clothes that smell substantially of cigarettes — is this a problem?
Thanks for the advice so far!
I have not bought any clothes since Dec’07 , I used to buy anything between $100 to $200 dollars per month on clothes and shoes. I am doing a spring cleaning of my closets and can still find pieces that have not been used, but there are also pieces that are not longer wearable …ragged, ratty … I am just getting rid of all this junk and keep whatever is in good condition.
My plan is not to buy clothes for the rest of the year, but that does not mean that I will wear anything just to cover my body.
Even frugal people can look classy and neat.
If you’re looking for clothing in thrift stores, bear in mind that many of these thrift stores take in donations from the surrounding neighborhood, and that what people throw away varies from one neighborhood to another. A thrift store in a nice neighborhood can have astonishingly high quality clothes.
“….because we are all more productive when we are dressed to work.”
I absolutely despise statements like this.
It depends on the person -and especially their generation/upbringing- whether “dressing up” puts them into some magical work-conducive trance. I’m 25 and the first thing I do when coming home from work is to rip off my tie, shirt, and pants to get into jeans and a t-shirt. Does this mean that I suddenly stop being able to work? No, in fact I often do freelance work at home. What it means is that I refuse to condition myself to associate my ability to function with a type of clothing.
My only constant rule for clothing is that it must be clean. Note that frayed or worn clothing is not dirty, it’s just frayed or worn. But even if you stain something badly you can still keep it around for yard/shop work.
ON EBAY: You don’t necessarily have to get used clothing on ebay. I got a new, top brand motorcycle jacket for $76 (with shipping) because a brick-and-mortar store was clearing out last year’s style. Original price $250. The advantage here is that you’re able to search for the exact size you want, so there is instantly a limit on the number of people that can bid on the item. It really improves the odds of getting something cheap compared to say, an iPod that anyone can use.
Don’t let these people chide you for wearing “frayed” clothes. Besides, have you seen what kids wear these days? You have to pay good money for that distressed look. Don’t fight it, embrace it.
I second Shirley. No excuse for threadbare.
You don’t need eBay. You/we live in one of the best thrift store markets in the country! Can you say Goodwill? Portland is the #1 market for them, and there is a great outlet in Milwaukee–clothing for pennies per pound. Also, for more upscale, trendy clothes try Red Light, Buffalo Exchange, etc.
I agree with Isela, too. Thifty people can be neat and look well-dressed. Geez.
I bet your “golden boys” are a reminder and memorial to how far you’ve come. There should be some happy medium, but keeping a few well loved pieces that give you your sense of [frugal] self is not a bad thing. Time, Place, Balance.
Daedala started a follow-up on decluttering clothes in the forums.
let some rookies in the game, new goldenboys will arise. The circle of life.
I know how you feel JD. I started to look a bit shabby last year and had to invest in some new clothes for work. It was hard to spend the money though. I used eBay. If you are patient you can get new clothes for very little money. I always look at auctions that are finishing at silly times, as there is not so much interest in them.
I don’t understand why people keep buying so much clothes at thrift stores. Once in a while I guess would do, but all the time means you are probably the type of person that walks into a department store and buys the stuff hanging on the main aisle racks.
I shop at the mall, dept stores, TJ Maxx, etc… and get really GREAT deals on quality brand name NEW clothes. I usually head, not just for the SALE racks, but the 50%-70% off clearance racks and stuff that’s all the way in the back not sorted nicely. On top of that, I try to get on mailing lists for dept. stores such as Macy’s, JcPenny’s, etc, since they practically give away their clothes at the end of the season. HINT: Buy your clothes at the end of the season and plan to use them next year as this is the best time to get rock bottom bargains.
Some examples of what I pay for brand name NEW Men’s/Women’s clothing that include Kenneth Cole, Gap, Tommy Hilfigir, Old Navy Etc…:
Sweaters: $4-$12
Jeans: $9-$19
Pants: $5-$15
T-shirts: $2-$7
Looks similar to Thrift shop prices right?
I don’t like going shopping so I time the season right as well as check advertisements for deals. I also made a deal with myself that it’s OK if I don’t find anything at my target prices. I don’t have to come home with anything. That’s the key, not to get all worked up and think you need to buy something because you spent the afternoon at the mall. Sometimes you just can’t find it. Also, on RARE occasions I’ll go over my target prices by like $3-$6 dollars and that’s Ok if I REALLY like it and KNOW I will get lots of use from it. For the past 10 years I’ve been using this strategy and it has worked out great for me.
Perfect example was two weeks ago we took my son to a free easter egg hunt at the mall. After the event, we went into Macy’s and found $40 sweaters at $4.99 each. On top of that my wife had a coupon they sent us for 20% off one day. In the end we Paid $3.99 each for like 6 sweaters that someone paid a whole lot more for at the beginning of the season.
I am a fat woman and therefore typical thrift store shopping is a difficult exercise for me to find tasteful, youthful clothing. However, a friend just turned me on to a thrift/resale store specifically for women sizes 12-32 here in PDX, and I went there this afternoon. I purchased five items, thereby increasing my work wardrobe by 1/3rd (three seperates, one dress, and one pair of nylons that matches all the pieces). Grand total: $46.40 *and* I have information on consigning or trading in some of my other clothes. Plus, I have an awesome dress for Easter services tomorrow, and it was brand new and 50% off, for $11.60.
Bless working in software, one of the very few fields you can get away with it and it’s considered normal. I wear extremely frayed jeans to work everyday and if I wear a newish shirt I’m probably dressed better than average.
I’ve really come to think of wearing a hoody to work more of a right than a privilege.
Of course it does help that I’m in a steady long term relationship and that my girlfriend is anything but a consumerist fashionista. But come on JD, you’re working from home! Have a few nice outfits for going out and otherwise enjoy your worn-in favorites.
Of course, socks with holes anyone would replace. Socks are extreme consumables, I throw socks away when they get a hole and pick up another 12 pack at costco when I’m running a little low.
This does bring up an interesting dilemma I follow both here and on TSD. You both have nice stuff from when you overspent, and during the first couple years all that stuff is new, but as time goes on, you’re going to need to start replacing stuff, and I’m curious how you’re both going to handle it.
Clothes are the first to go, but what happens when a nice TV or some nice gadget goes bad that maybe was more than what was necessary, but was enjoyable none the less. Do you replace it with the contemporary equivalent, downsize to something more reasonable, or forgo it all together.
I’m always hearing about how we’re more productive when we’re dressed for work, but i find that i am uncomfortable in work clothes and that actually stops me doing my job. Tshirt and jeans gets twice as much done, for me! So it doesn’t always apply.
Hey, the big problem for me in getting rid of old clothes is that they are just so comfortable! I am much more productive at home with my old ratty clothes on because I am comfortable and don’t worry about staining them. So I wear my old clothes at home and change to go out. Definitely keeps the clothes in circulation longer, therefore saving money and resources. In the end though, they are rags!
Most of the everyday clothes I wear around the house or on the weekends are t-shirts purchased from Target (no more than $12 each) and jeans purchased at Costco (no more than $25).
I have a business casual wardrobe for work that was about $700, which included a nice suit from Men’s Warehouse. The rest is button up / dress shirts, Dockers slacks, etc purchased on sale or clearance at Nordstrom Rack and some of the typical mall stores. I’ve got easily a week and a half worth of clothes which really cost about $300, since the suit was bulk of the 700.
J.D.–I was definitely surprised to see my response front and center here today. I chuckled, especially at Chris’ concurrence, until I saw some of the other comments here. Let me add some clarification. First, sometimes I think you make things too hard and overanalyze. You don’t have to come up with some major plan and start comparison shopping on eBay, etc. Start by purging a few of the clothing items you know are really way past saving. The first time you do this will be the very hardest. Then it gets easier each time you look through your clothes again and it actually feels freeing to let them go. Let the guilt go on items that don’t fit or you’ve never worn. I always feel like crap when I look at clothing items that I own like that and getting rid of them (so I am no longer reminder of my failure to be slimmer or my mistake in purchasing them) makes me feel tons better and will make you feel better, too. They are history. (You can donate them to charity for a deduction if they are new or in good shape.) Friends have bought clothes on eBay, but I really need to try most items on unless I am buying from mail order companies where I buy classic styles and know what size I wear. Thrift shops are the very best for me. (Today, I purchased 5 men’s “like new” shirts (Geoffrey Beene, Brooks Brothers, Etienne Aigner, and Old Navy), a beautiful black full-length formal wear coat for myself, 2 plates, 2 wash cloths, and a Black and Decker mini-chopper all for $7.40. The total amount is NOT a typo. The shirts will go to my nephew who is straight out of college and working a job where he has to wear a shirt and tie daily. Last week, I bought two designer wool sport coats at $2 each for him. The last items in the list were for my college-age son in his first apt.) Go every few days and quickly go through the store looking for stuff that appeals to you immediately. You really only need to get a few things most likely. As far as my comment about dressing to the shoes, you folks are misinterpreting me, I am not saying you have to dress up. I am saying literally get dressed with your shoes on in decent clothes, not ratty ones. I absolutely believe you can be productive in a jeans and a t-shirt, but I can’t be productive in pajamas, sweat pants, ratty clothes, or slippers or barefoot. When I am dressed with shoes on, talking sneakers here, at home, my mind knows I am still in work mode—whether it’s doing real work or things I want to get done at home. The minute the shoes come off and the comfy/lounging clothes come on, I enter lounging mode. As far as old t-shirts, J. D., even threadbare ones, maybe some represent special times to you, your youth, etc. Save a few special ones, even if you stuff them in the back of your drawer. To be clear, I am not pushing spending tons of money on clothing, tons of time on purchasing bargains, or dressing in a suit and wingtips every day to be productive.
I have worked from home for almost 3 years (2000 miles away from the boss and coworkers). Believe me, my work wardrobe is generally not something I’m proud of — especially in the winter when my house is COLD (between 55F and 68F)! My LA coworkers laugh when I describe my collection of t-shirts, hats, fingerless gloves, fleece, sweatshirts, long underwear, and slippers! NO VIDEOCONFERENCING!
Summer is just t-shirts and shorts. My friends laugh that I get “dressed up” to go to choir rehearsals and to pick up the kids.
However, I have a number of classic pieces I can pull together when I need to. Blazers, cotton tops, slacks, skirt, “nice jeans”, and shoes. I can get 1-2 weeks’ worth of nice work outfits if I need to.
And yes, most of it is from Lands’ End, bought online or at an Inlet or Outlet store. LE is never quite “in style”, so it seems to take a bit longer than average to really obviously become “out of style.”
I keep a running mental list of things I need and snag them when they’re on sale.
I will, however splurge for a special event dress or a good interview suit and accessories — personal attention, tailoring and all. Both usually end up being investments: I’ll wear the dress multiple times and feel fabulous every time, and the suit can boost my confidence when I need it most! I miss having a Nordstrom’s nearby!
I have several “golden boys” in my closet! My wife has threatened to get rid of a few of them, and a couple of my older favorites have been relegated to “yard work” duty only. Too bad. There are some great memories in those stains…the blood, the sweat, the tears! Oh, and I love the Seinfeld reference - I had forgotten about that episode.
JD, it’s like you read my mind. I am going through a similar situation where I really should update my clothes and purge the ratty stuff, but it’s hard to take that step financially. So I’ve decided that I need to treat this like any expense. I need to budget for it and just do it, and then not feel bad that I spent that money. Particularly if I’m careful about what I am purchasing, making sure I love everything I purchase.
I’m finding this conversation quite interesting, as someone who also works from home and whose job is all online (very rarely do I ever see the office.)
I, personally, would not be happy if my clothing was tattered, stained, and fraying. I don’t care “what the kids are wearing” — I’m an adult, not a teenager, and I’ve long since stopped seeing the point in basing my actions on “the kids.” Many of those kids also drink and party far too much, carry too much debt, and bedhop more often than is really good for them, after all! Neat, clean, and comfortable are the minimum requirements for my clothing, and in a lesser way, for the people I associate with and do business with.
Do away with the labels if you like, but someone wearing tatty sneakers and “blessed” shirts had better have shown up either to clean my house, fix my plumbing, or cut my lawn, because I expect anyone in another line of work to look like a business person. You can get clothing that meets all those minimum requirements without spending a fortune, so why wouldn’t you?
Shirley wrote: Sometimes I think you make things too hard and overanalyze.
Kris calls me Mr. Overanalytical. It’s bad news if it’s starting to show on the blog!
Thanks, Shirley (and everyone else). Don’t worry — I’m not planning to make a big production out of this, and I’m not going to go into a spending frenzy. I can still wear some of my Golden Boys around the house when I’m working from home. But it would be nice to have a few nicer pieces of clothing for when I go out to meet colleagues, etc.
Sometimes blog entries make it seem like I’m being more overanalytical than I really am. I’m not sure how to fix this. Golden Boy, etc. seemed like a good Saturday topic — I didn’t mean to make it sound like I was having a wardrobe crisis.
I have a couple t-shirts which are half as old as I am (which isn’t as old as all that, but still). They’re incredibly comfy, so I’ve relegated them to “dirty duty” and sleep. I’ll put one on if I’m going to clean the house, work up a sweat, paint, etc. Then if they’ve undergone strenuous duty they get re-evaluated to see if they’re allowed to continue or go in the rag bag.
At least you have those nice thinner clothes waiting for you! That’s exciting.
I’ve realized I have plenty of clothes for my current lot in life, and need to wear things out before I think of replacing them. I am an admirer of Henry David Thoreau and “Walden”. In fact, in my online personals profile that my now-fiance responded to, I mentioned Thoreau. My fiance appreciates simplicity and frugality as I do (though we both have areas of indulgence).
For the single folks who think you must dress to impress, sure we want to look nice the first time we meet someone. But we will attract people with similar values if that is not the focus. You can look nice without going out and buying something new each time you have a dress-up occasion.
Walden has some thoughts on this topic:
As for clothing, perhaps we are led oftener by the love of novelty, and a regard for the opinions of men, in procuring it, than by a true utility.
I am sure that there is a greater anxiety, commonly, to have fashionable, or at least clean and unpatched clothes, than to have a sound conscience.
But if my jacket and trousers, my hat and shoes, are fit to worship God in, they will do, will they not?
Perhaps we should never procure a new suit, however ragged or dirty the old, until we have so conducted, so enterprised or sailed in some way, that we feel like new men in the old, and that to retain it would be like keeping new wine in old bottles.
I think it’s fine to dress down or frayed as much as you like in personal and casual time. When it comes to the workplace, though, I feel that it helps to put the extra effort into clothing - clean, ironed if needed, no holes or fraying, relatively well-fitting.
It’s unpleasant but true that we tend to judge on appearances, and neatly dressed people create an image of care toward detail that connotes professionalism. Your work might speak for itself, but it’s completely hamstrung if your clothes speak against you first in the eyes of a client or customer.
J.D., I have several t-shirts that should be only worn on Sundays because they are getting “holey”! While I didn’t wear these out much once they wore out, they were always being worn under a dress shirt or around the house. One of them, a Metallica t-shirt, I kept vowing to replace and got a new nicer Metallica shirt as a Christmas gift. Despite this, I still wore the shirt for at least 6 months until it mysteriously disappeared. Either my wife finally got sick of seeing it and threw it out or it simply disintegrated into dust particles, I’m not certain.
Most of us have a closet full of clothes but have our favorites that we wear constantly. Don’t be guilted into a shopping spree, I’m sure what you have is fine. Do use the Lands End gift cards, however. I still have several gift cards that I never seem to get around to using for some reason.
Funny thing about Seinfeld’s “Golden Boy”, he had it 6 years and we never saw him wear it (or any other t-shirts for that matter).
I hate getting dressed up. I wish I could work from home so I could wear what I want. I will have to say, 99% of my clothes over the past year have been from different thrift stores- Goodwill mainly. I love going to different Goodwills! Normally I will go in the good areas of town because a lot of rich people donate their clothes there. Also, consider going to consignment stores. There seem to be a lot popping up lately! Don’t forget ebay, either!
Had to chuckle at this article. I’m on my third career, currently SAHM, and have an extra closetful of clothes ranging from business suits to business casual including formalwear in a variety of sizes.
My guilty pleasure is reading Vogue magazine cover to cover. (Unless you are above reproach, please refrain from comment
So what is my current wardrobe - very worn t-shirts and sweats. Of course, if my children and I go outside I have to change into something a little better but then I change right back once I’m inside. Sometimes several outfit changes a day!
Yes, I know how to recirculate clothes - consignment shops, garage sales, charity drop offs - heck, I’ve even organized a swap among friends.
But I too have decided to purge all my ripped, stained clothes this spring. Here’s to the simple life!
JD — Here’s what you should do. Wash all your clothes so everything is clean and in the closet. Then go through your clothes mercilessly and toss it if it doesn’t fit or is getting tattered. Disregard whether it’s tattered but you love it. Just discard it.
(if you want to set aside select items for a leaner stage of get fit slowly, that’s ok, but try to be ruthless in analyzing that something fits or not.
OK — all done? now take a look at what’s left? where are the gaps? Do you still have enough serviceable pants for your needs, but need shirts? etc….
Now, take your Land’s End gift certificates and start shopping to fill the gaps. Spill over to cash if needed.
Just do it.
P.S. — I also advocate thinking a little about your basic look (and keeping it fairly classic). If you know that dockers and Tshirts fit the bill most of the time, that’s your look. If you know that having white and black tshirts on hand is all the really matters to you, don’t worry about having a rainbow of colors, just get several in white and several in black. Etc.
On the other hand, if you’re a suit-and-tie guy (not that I think you are), invest in a handful of great suits and disregard worrying about your casual wear so much. You get the idea
I find that TJ Maxx stretches my budget quite a ways. And you can get some good name brand clothes.
Glad to see you’ve come to see things my way
Now get shopping!
I recently made a major career change, I was sick and tired of my old job, I went back to school and finished my degree and started working at a large company. My old job was construction, so I only had one suit and a few awful ties that people had given me over the years, the place I ended up working is a real old school financial services company that required suit and tie every day…I had a problem, I was taking a pay cut changing careers…and it was costing me money before I even started! So I had to get creative.
Now my secret weapons are a great thrift store and e-bay. I bough a pair of slightly used Allen Edmonds shoes from ebay for about $30. These shoes cost around $400 new, with shipping they cost me $40. I found a few old suits in great condition at a thrift shop and took them to a tailor to have them altered, actually the tailor was the most expensive part of the process, but the suits were all imported from england and italy and I got them for $8 each, it cost about 70 to have the alterations done by a professional, but I had a decent work wardrobe for just a little over $130. That’s three suits and a pair of really nice shoes …I had a belt and a few pairs of dress socks …and the suit I had to begin with so I was good to go to work for a few months till I saved up a little money and bought two new suits that were on sale for $200. Now I’m probably one of the better dressed guys in the division, someone told me that the other trainees all thought I was a millionaire the way I dress, I had to tell him the truth and how I did it…it’s important in that industry to look very professional and polished…and I’ve pulled it off for a little over $300! But I haven’t shared with anyone the location of my favorite thrift store yet, after all,a guy has to retain some mystery!
My boyfriend’s mum handwashes all her clothes,including jeans, very gently with mild detergent.
Most of her clothes are more than ten years old but looks brand new.
To cyberspending who goes shopping and gets great deals at stores, I say fine if that works for you. My mom does that, but there are several reasons that does not work for me most of the time. I am in a rural area, 30 miles from such stores. I hate shopping and all you have to do to get to the shopping. Those types of stores mean lots of traffic and hassles. Frankly, I am the type of person who does better with limited choices. You know the whole concept that we have too many choices today? I agree wholeheartedly with that. For example, I preferred the small mom and pop grocery rather than aisles and aisles of products to go through. Likewise, unless I am looking for something very special, I prefer the small thrift shop or a catalog I can flip through in minutes (with discount codes and sales). I can get in and out of the thrift shop in 10-15 minutes (it’s 5 minutes from my house and there’s another one 5 minutes from work), sometimes with nothing, sometimes with several amazing purchases like yesterday. My costs are way below what you quoted. The most I have ever spent for a single item was $5 and that was for a waist-length mink coat–no kidding (and no anti-fur comments, please). My sister and I have worn it to teas and costume parties for fun. Usually I spend .50 or a $1 on each item. Leather coats cost $2. If I decide I don’t like the item that much after a while or get tired of it, I just donate it back. I only go when it’s convenient for me or I am looking for something. The one close to home is open only Sat. morning and the one close to work is only open Thurs. morning. Still works out fine for me.
Wayne-Awesome job on getting prepared for your new career. Love the millionaire comment!
Louise, you’re right that Flylady promotes getting “dressed to the shoes,” but I am pretty certain she said that comes from Mary Kay as she was an MK consultant many years ago. MK taught all her consultants to be dressed with their shoes on before they made telephone calls, etc. because they would feel ready to work, promote confidence, etc. I don’t feel you have to be lacking structure to benefit from it, but to each his own. BTW, it’s often the concept that Flylady members fight the most and then later say it made the most difference.
Lots of great comments. Always love the discussions here.
You should not buy new with the gift cards, unless they’re things like underwear and socks that you can’t really get used (and might not want to).
If you can bring yourself to, sell the gift cards, buy thrift store clothes, and invest the rest. Buying new is rarely worth it, because there are so many alternatives that Madison Avenue successfully convinces people to disdain that there’s not much competition there.
I’m another person who believes that how you are dressed has absolutely no effect on your productivity. I’ve been working at home since 1994 and am just as productive when working in my underwear on a hot summer day as I am on the two to three days a year when I have to work in my company’s headquarters and dress up. I wear clothes until they are practically falling off; I have a few favorite old Patagonia flannel shirts that I bought in the 1980s that I still wear; they are tattered but incredibly comfortable. In fact many of my shirts and trousers are more than 10 years old, and some are more than 20. I do own one suit (that I bought in 1992) that I use for business travel, and I have a few nice shirts and a nice pair of trousers that I can wear when meeting clients. But the rest of the time, comfort and casualness are my priorities; if someone thinks I look poor or unprofessional because my clothes are a little worn, that’s their problem not mine.
I’m a young fashionable girl supporting a mortgage alone, so the first thing that went to the wayside was clothing (once i started getting rich slowly with the help of this site). I rekindled my teenage love for thrifting, which has been a lot of fun. I probably spend max $50 a month on clothes - including heavy use winter items like tights and shoes. I work in a high-end sales position, but my outfits always look nice, because i’m careful about quality of the fabric and the original label. I’m always proud when i find some ridiculously fancy label at good will and it’s 7 bucks and it fits!
though, jd, i’ve been doing the get fit slowly routine, too. now i don’t have much of anything that fits, so i have a little online savings account growing and a lot of safety pins tailoring what’s left. i’ve bought a couple transition items until i get to my goal weight. when that happens i’ll have a couple hundred dollars and i plan to come out looking couture, in clothes that fit my new body. I bet i can come out with a whole seasons wardrobe for that, now that’s a challenge for a fashionista!
(i know you’re in pdx - so check out the goodwill on tenth - opposite the library downtown - great quality - a bit spendier but well worth the time savings.)
I have a “golden boy”; it’s an old black nike hoodie that I got off a clearance rack. The neck is torn, there are bleach spots and the string on the hood is long gone. I can’t wear it in public, lest I face public ridicule.
I. Will. Not. Give. It. Up.
That being said, when I’m going to work or even to the grocery store, I always ask myself whether my mother would approve of what I’m wearing. She was never dressed to the nines, but she always insisted on looking presentable; e.g. clean clothing in good condition and good grooming.
It’s okay to shop at thrift shops, Land’s End, LL Bean (great long lasting stuff if you can handle the lack of style) or any other store known for high quality clothing as long as you’re willing to wear it a long time and take good care of it.
I too always find new clothes for cheap on eBay, like Levi’s at 52 euros rather than 90-110 (price in stores)! Of course I try them on at the mall before…
Otherwise, it’s a bit risky - I’ve bought nice, cheap things on websites but sometimes had surprises when they came. Shirt not fitting perfectly, shoes a bit too hard… Better to shop offline - only for clothes which really strike me as great.
FIRST, mend your clothes. Holes on seams are pretty easy. There are good instructions online. Also, if you invest in good wool socks, you can darn them pretty well with a bit of appropriate thread or yard.
THEN: the stuff that’s beyond mending, I hope you’ll reuse as cleaning rags or something.
And I do hope you buy at least some of your new clothes second hand. There are good almost-new or new clothes at second hand stores.
Also, I wear frayed clothes often, though I have a few “good” shirts and pants for meeting. Part of my job is outdoors and grubby. There is no reason to dress up for that and infact, by the end of each work season, very few people are wearing clothes without holes, stains, or frays. Mint-condition clothing is seen as a sign that someone isn’t working hard enough.
So also think about your job and the expectations. It will vary. If you write and do that better in frayed jammie pants, why not wear them?
Seriously, as much as I understand trying to save money AND holding on to clothes that “are still good!” I purged a couple years ago and I’ve been glad to keep purged since then. I kept many clothes I didn’t need and just kept stuffing & stuffing my drawers.
You’ll get a good feeling from the simplicity of it all when you see your nearly-empty drawers and know you only have the clothes that you really need and will wear.
Clean out those drawers!
I’m frugal but I purchase my clothing new. The smell of thrift shops and consignment shops makes me ill. I just can’t do it.
Here in Australia we have ‘direct factory outlets’ and its where i buy all my clothing, usually a maximum of 2 times a year. Different clothes age at different speeds.
If you start without anything and buy a whole wardrobe for $1200 you can from then on get by with $400 a year. This means that roughly every year you’ll have about 1/3 of your clothes to give to charity.
I buy a lot of my clothes at Target. I hear the women’s section isn’t all that great, but you can generally get pretty good deals on some name-brand clothes in the men’s section. And some of the Target brands seem to be pretty high-quality, although it’s hit or miss. Other than that, I shop at factory-direct outlets. My mother lives near one so sometimes I’ll stop by when I’m visiting.
Otherwise, I run the risk of crossing the line from “frugal” to “slob”.
Oh, it’s always such a fine line, eh?
I could use a run to the used clothing store myself.
people always give that “dress to the shoes advice” - flylady says that, too. one of the things i *love* about working from home is working in pajama pants. and i think i write *best* when i am completely comfortable.
I think the key is to choose your favorite golden boys. There’s nothing wrong with a frayed shirt around the house or if you’re going on a walk.
Take inventory of what you have and what needs to be relaced. Check your local thrift stores, discount stores (Ross, TJ Max, etc), and use the gift card to slowly replace the not so golden boys.
three things: 1) I think that hanging on to clothes may be a particular subset of hoarding complex. clothes are a really personal set of items, so discarding them can be like giving away or rejecting a part of yourself.
2) acquiring new clothes can be really painful. My husband is smaller than most American males (5′8″ and under 140 lbs) and finds it really hard to shop for clothes and while, sure, things can be tailored, he finds the whole experience of shopping completely unappealing. And I’m sure I speak for many women who ends up buying shoes and hats because after a few hours of trying things on that don’t look good on me, it’s a relief to find something that fits!
3) So, I do have an expensive hobby of using mail order. I find that the Sierra Trading Company catalogs are a good source for brand name discounted clothes and shoes, but even then, I send things back after trying them on…
Now into my 5th year of being a SAHM and having just given birth to my third daughter, my wardrobe was rediculous. Nothing fit anymore (and I mean virtually -nothing) I just went and spent a fair chunk of money on new (brand name) clothes. I don’t have any debt and the money was there. I also went to factory outlets for this shopping spree. Basically I live 2 hours drive from decent shopping - but there’s no such thing as “cheap” shopping there either - we had to go 1000km for this trip.
But you know what? I now have 7 new outfits, and 7 old outfits, they all fit, all look good on me (which makes me feel good about myself) I “work” from home, but just getting dressed in good casual clothes makes me feel better. I can answer the door, run out to the shops/pick up the hubby/swimming/dancing/school/daycare at a moments notice and not stress about what people are thinking of me.
And the best part of buying all these clothes together? They ALL mix and match. I have 14 bottoms and 14 tops, and any top can go with any bottom.
But even though I normally buy cheaper clothes a bit more regularly (every couple of months or so) I’ve had NO desire to even look at new clothes. My favourite online shop has 25% off this weekend and I haven’t even gone to look. My wardrobe is now one area of my life/budget I don’t need to think about.
While we were there we also did hubby’s and the kids wardrobes. There’s no clothes needed now for probably a year or two.
Ha, to me it’s all about the image you want to project. I want to project that I don’t care about what brand of clothes or how nice my clothes are, because… I don’t. Comfortable and clean are most important. I also like be-friending people who are the same way.
This is outside of work, of course… But like Red said, you work from home! Do what you like. You can look nice frugally, or you can look “relaxed” frugally.
If you wait for the end-of-season sales, buying new clothes at certain stores is even less expensive than used clothing at thrift shops. For instance, I recently bought a pair of new cargo-style jeans at K-mart for .39 cents. Admittedly that is my best bargain in a long while, but I also got a new down jacket at the same time for 7.00. It’s been a heck of a long time since I’ve paid more than 5.00 for a new shirt. Best stores I’ve found for end of season bargains: K-mart, Kohls, Target(occasionally).
Celina – those Lands End shirts lasted 65 wearings each. I don’t know but that doesn’t seem like a lot to me. I got a pair of Eastland shoes and they lasted me 9 years, wearing them about every other day, so your 2 years again doesn’t seem like a lot. But your overall point of spending a little more for quality clothing that lasts longer is a good one.
Interesting exchange. I’m still waiting for somebody to post a good reason for wearing so-called “nice” clothes. I can see the point if we’re talking clean, but beyond that I’ve never understood dress codes and fashion police. If you want to, sure - go for it but count me among the slobs :-). A few years ago, I used to work as a PC tech for a local company and the dress code was shirt and tie, no jeans, no sneakers. Tell me I was working more efficiently crawling around under peoples’ desks running cables and choking on my tie. No, I was sweating bullets and ruining a lot of “good clothes”. All part of the game, I guess. These days I’m the one sitting at the desk that PC techs have to crawl under. I wear whatever I feel like wearing - as long as it’s clean and gets the job done, why should anybody care?
Guys, about the dryer thing: you can put clothes in the dryer for a few minutes, then take them out, and hang them up on a hanger to air dry. That will keep them new longer and the few minutes in the dryer gets most of the wrinkles out. If you have a home dryer and turn it off early, it will save electricity, save on wear and tear on your applicance, and is good for the environment. Right now, I have to go to the apartment laundry room so I put in my wearing clothes on delicate for a few minutes, then take them out and replace them with my sheets and towels on the heavy dryer setting. (When I put my money in, it will go for the full hour, you can’t stop it, so this is how I keep from running an empty dryer for 40 minutes or so.) What few wrinkles are still in my clothes, I can spray out either with spray starch or a generic version of that wrinkle rid stuff that comes in the plastic spray pump bottle(I get it at the dollar store, it’s cheaper). My friend Allison uses the wrinkle rid stuff but she waters it down and says it works just as well as full strength.You can also put a clothes rack over your bathroom door and hang a couple of garments in there when you take a steamy shower and the steam will help de-wrinkle them.Finally, when you go shopping, a cotton blend will wrinkle less and shrink less than anything that is 100% cotton. One advantage of second hand clothes from thrift shops and garage sales: they’ve already been washed and shrunk so you know they will stay that particular size (try it on or hold it up against you so you know it will fit — size labels are often wrong.)
You “dressed to the shoes” people would be proud. I have a big day ahead today, mostly working from home. I have a phone interview, I have to finish an e-book, I have to do my taxes, etc. To get myself in the right frame of mind, after I finished working out, I showered, and put on my best non-ratty clothes. I almost look respectable!
I am one of those people who has just a few favorite outfits and then wears them to death. I do go shopping at thrift stores, but often I will be looking for something specific and can’t find it. Even if I find stuff it’s not what I’m looking for and not sure I want to get a bunch of extra stuff filling up my closet space (very limited). I really like Land’s end. The stuff is not exactly cutting edge, but it’s well made and I know my size, so it’s my go to place when I need to fill in a hole in my wardrobe. Thrift and TJ maxx are good when you are bored with your wardrobe and want something new, and are open with trying something different, not if have a list of something very specific you are looking for.
I always look like a semi-bum too. I think it just comes from being Gen-X. New clothes from Banana Republic don’t look cool to me. Concert t-shirts do and I’ll wear them till they fall apart, go figure.
I’ve used ebay! And very successfully I might add (for clothes and shoes). Here are my tips:
The best deals out there are from other people just like you who are cleaning out their closets. Their clothes don’t fit, or they’ve overspend and need some cash. I hardly ever buy from ebay businesses… they mark up so high that it’s hardly a deal.
Buy brands that you already own/have owned… that way you know that the size will fit you.
Or, ask them to take measurements, and use that to try and guage the fit. People who sell from smoke free homes will usually mention it, but it never hurts to ask either.
Good luck!!
There are 2 tricks to buying clothes in a frugal manner:
1. Spend a lot of money up front, but only classic styles (i.e.: those that don’t go out of style) made out of high quality materials. While the initial cost here is very high, you are buying high quality, classic clothing that will last and serve you well for years to come (so long as you don’t gain or lose a lot of weight but, even then, you can usually get the clothes tailored for cheaper than “re-buying” the same item in your new size).
2. Go to thrift stores. Try your best to go for high quality, classic items. But, even doing this, odds are that you’ll have to replace the clothes sooner than if you’d bought them new, so the long-term costs might not be much lower. Then again, you can often find things in thrift stores that have obviously never been worn before.
I would recommend doing something that seems contrary to frugal living: throw out ALL of your ratty old clothes. You might not be left with much, but by forcing yourself to buy new clothes, and to spend money on them, you will carefully select the clothes that you think are of the best quality, and that will last you the longest so that you won’t have to spend money on clothes again for a few years. Whether you buy a few new items, or a slightly larger selection of quality used items, it will be worth it in the long run.
My line of business (real estate) requires that I dress well. I put my my business wardrobe together several years ago and it was not cheap. Shoes are $400/pair, suits $1200, and shirts $160/each tailored.
While it may seem expensive (it is relative to some of the prices noted here), the quality is unsurpassed and the fit to off-the-rack has no comparison. For me, this was money well spent.
As a corollary to this, my colleague purchased similar shoes and shirts, Alden and Brooks Brothers, respectively, about 12 years ago. He still wears the shoes (they’ve been refurbished twice) and shirts on a daily basis. That sounds like a wise use of the money.
Land’s End gift cards?! They’re a frugal dream: the Overstocks section of the Land’s End site dresses my kids almost as cheaply as used clothes.
(But don’t buy the red twill pants. They’re ugly at any price.)
#58 nails it on the head. No offense JD, but you do collect comic books and collecting is a form of hoarding if it’s unchecked. You might want to ask yourself why the attachment to a material item. Frequently I find the emotional attachment to an object keeps it from getting tossed out when there is no other practical use for it. Trust me. My ‘Golden Boy’ is a TWEEDS mock turtleneck whose neck and cuffs are frayed through. I know it’s next life is in a memory quilt of some kind though…
Lands’ End OVERSTOCKS, baby! Your $150 will go quite far there. Check on Wednesdays and the rest of the week to watch the prices and inventory go down. Don’t wait too long though or the good deals will be G-O-N-E.
New to this site but love the feedback already. Just to add to the list………my hubby got a promotion in his job recently. He went from wearing a company uniform daily to business casual. Needless to say he needed an entirely new wardrobe. Within two weeks of shopping several local thrift stores I had him completely outfitted. Often the the items still had tags attached, brands like L.L. Bean, Land’s End, Docker’s, Tommy Hilfiger, etc.
In fact we almost completely shop thrift form my family of five and it always gives me a big smile when people stop me to comment on my cute jacket or awesome necklace that I only paid a
$ 1.00 for!!!! Even my daughters get a kick out of wearing a Roxy or Aeopostle shirt or hoodie they paid a buck or two for and their school mates are paying $20.00 to $ 40.00 for the same thing. Even as teens they realize what we save in clothing budgets can create travel opportunities we might not otherwise afford.
Last year I ran into a consignment store that was closing their business and bought 3 business suits for me, and a prom dress for my daughter. Each item was only a dollar!
Our local thrift consist of Salvation Army and Goodwill. We also have one or two decent consigntment stores close by.
I also subscribe to reusing and recycling clothes into cleaning rags, crafts, etc.
Dear Friends, Not to be contrarian, but the men I know who have the oldest shirts with wear at the neck are members of the “British Priviledged” class. They buy good shirts and literally wear them to rags. The son may be chauffered by helicopter to school every day, while the father wears shirts which are worn at neck and cuffs. The shirts are bespoke (custom tailored) and they’re expected to last forever. It’s a symbol of pride with the British upper class, the women wear the same dresses and suits for decades (with knock your eye out family diamonds), and the men never part with their shirts. These people could easily buy new, but they don’t, it’s a badge of honor for them to buy the best and wear it forever. It’s an old money look and you have to have an old money aura to pull it off. That said, it doesn’t extend to sweatshirts, cut off denims and tees. It’s a hard look to carry off if you’re not with the Brit or Boston Brahmin upper crust, but if you’re that type of man, the worn shirt gives you cache.
Although the idea of a “disposable culture” is kind of sickening,it does have some up-sides. I’ve seen clothing in thrift stores only 4 months after they were in stores, sometimes still with their original tags attached!
Last week I picked up a brand new pair of pants from The Gap in a thrift store for only $5! In the past year, through the powers of Ebay, thrift stores and clothing swap parties with friends, I spent $75 on clothing (not including underwear) and I got loads of compliments on what I wore to work. I think you just have to shop smart.
Maybe some of these clothes are repairable? For instance, wearing out at the seams is definately re-sewable. The question is does it take more time to fix them than they are worth?
I volunteer at a thrift store ..we open bags of clothing ..skirts tops shoes ..Tights..The Tights go straight in the rag bag ..they are shredded and used for used for stuffing or sent to Fistula Hospital ..so throw out your tights ..especially “Thick” Black ones
“sharp, shiny dress is merely conspicuous or wanna-be wealth. the real ‘losers’ are anyone consuming beyond what is basically necessary”
Good thing no-one’s getting all judgy there, right, Sal?
Working from home at the computer I wear jeans and t-shirts/ or shorts & t-shirts/ or jeans and sweatshirts - depending upon the temperature! All these are clean and mended neatly, if necessary. You all should learn how to mend clothes! A needle and thread and proper washing and prompt spot removal do wonders. (But I also do have dressier casual clothes I would wear, say, to a choir rehearsal! There is a hierarchy - things start “good” and go down the scale as they age!)