I earned more money in 2008 than I’ve ever made in my life. Get Rich Slowly isn’t just a personal success — it’s a financial success, as well. Combine this income with an ongoing campaign of frugality — my spending last year was the lowest it’s been since I started tracking it — and my financial position is rosy. My plan to get rich slowly is succeeding.
Financial security
Yet despite my increased wealth, I am not happy. I love what I do — I love writing every day and interacting with readers — but I do too much of it. I spend about 60 hours each week working on this site. I’m neglecting other parts of my life.
I’ve reached a place of financial security. My income is good. I save and invest. I don’t spend frivolously. Now I find myself in the enviable position of having to decide: Should I decrease my workload, or should I use some of my income to invest in the things that make me happy?
Eight years ago, before I started Get Rich Slowly and while I was still deep in debt, I wrote on my personal blog that my goal was “to live a pastoral lifestyle”. What I meant was that I wanted to live simply, with few obligations. I wanted to work from home, to bike on errands, to squash my obsession with Stuff. I wanted to read Dickens and Proust, to spend time with my friends, to enjoy life with Kris.
This is still my ideal.
The entire reason I paid off my debt, increased savings, quit my job, and built a business was so that I could live this pastoral lifestyle. But I’m not living it. In fact, I’m working harder than I ever have before.
I love this job. It’s a joy and a privilege to do what I do. But I wonder: Am I burning myself out? Am I sacrificing time for money? Maybe there’s some middle ground. Or maybe it’s time to move to a new stage of personal finance.
The stages of money
Last month, I had an interesting conversation with three GRS readers: John, Tyler, and Victoria. Via comments and e-mail, we discussed an important question: “What next?” Each of us, in our own way, has mastered the basics of money management. We’re ready to move from personal-finance goals to the next step. Tyler suggested that we’re at the “third stage” of financial maturity.
- The first stage of personal finance involves learning the basics: understanding compound interest, reducing debt, beginning to save.
- The second stage is putting the basics into practice: choosing to live frugally, saving in earnest, and pursuing financial goals.
- The third stage — the “what next?” stage — comes after we’ve mastered the fundamentals. It’s at this point that we begin to ask “why?” Why are we continuing to save? All of our debts are paid, so what’s the point? (There certainly is a point, but what is it?)
The four of us exchanged e-mail about what this third stage looks like, what it means to us. For example, Victoria wrote:
I, too, am beyond the first stages of personal finance. I’m focusing on self-education in entrepreneurship and philanthropy this year. I believe that every individual should have a progressive plan for when they move beyond debt, have maxed out their retirement plans, have all they need and have prioritized wants. “What next?” is a question that should be planned for.
John noted that once the basics become habit, there’s a change in mindset that needs to occur. Just as we had to shift our thinking in order to reduce our debt and to establish the habit of saving, so too must we learn that there are different types of spending:
What we’re doing now is investing. Maybe I’m investing in myself, maybe in other people, or maybe in causes or ideas that I want to help grow, but it is an investment. I am taking value that I have worked hard to build and develop and I am investing it in someone or something else. It’s not wasteful spending — I am expecting a return, not necessarily monetary, but for something positive to come out of it. Spending is more of a gut reaction. You buy something to feel better or to make up for something you are lacking. When you are investing, it is a conscious act done with a purpose. There is thought behind it.
Most of the financial information on the internet — and in magazines and books — is directed toward those in the first two stages. There’s a reason for this. The fundamentals are essential. But there’s more to smart personal finance than just practicing the basics. Where’s the information for those who are ready for the third stage? Are subsequent steps entirely self-directed? Is this where a financial planner comes in? And how many stages are there?
Victoria and Tyler and John wrote a lot more; I wish I had room to share it all. (I’ll be publishing a guest-post from John on this subject during the next month.) Suffice it to say that our conversation — and recent events — have forced me to think about what money actually means to me.
What next?
The death of my friend Sparky caused a seismic shift in my value system. I’m seeing fault lines I never knew existed. I still believe in the importance of smart personal finance, and I’m as passionate as ever about getting rich slowly. But I’m ready to explore new aspects of this philosophy.
Over the next few months, I hope to begin learning — and sharing — about other stages of personal finance. I’m going to start adding new flavors to the mix. I’m still going to write mostly about the fundamentals — debt reduction and frugality are important — but I want to write more about the Big Picture. I’ll spend time exploring the nature of social capital. I’ll try to discover the answer to the question “What next? What’s the next step after you’ve built a solid foundation?” I’m going to write about those times it makes sense to spend — or to invest — for things that make you happy.
Last summer, one GRS reader submitted a guest article about how his friend had bought a new boat. This friend had wanted the boat for a long time, and he could afford it. He knew it would make him happy. So he bought it.
I didn’t publish the story. I was worried that it would send the wrong message. I believed it might encourage reckless spending. In retrospect, I was wrong.
The boat story is about that “what next?” step I’m seeking. It’s about the third stage of money maturity. It’s an example of what is possible if we learn smart personal finance. It’s an example of the reason we work hard and practice frugality in the first place. It’s an example of the goal.
I’m not going to publish the boat story yet — I’ll save it until after Memorial Day so that it makes sense — but I’m going to publish stories like it. I see now that money is not the goal. The goal is to live a life in which we can do and have the things we want — by making conscious choices. Money is a tool for reaching that goal.
I’m going to have fun learning about the third stage of personal finance — and beyond. As always, I hope you’ll join me on the journey.
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This is a brave and honest post, which is what brought you to this point of course J.D.
But just to play Devil’s Advocate, is there not a danger than you’ll leave your readers behind?
Few of us are in this position (alas!) It may be hard to relate to you.
Really interested to see how you get on.
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Check out “Just Enough” by Howard Stevenson. There’s a whole section on incorporating wealth into larger life goals. I’m reading it for a class on life-planning and it strikes me that you’d enjoy it.
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may the Lord’s truth be revealed as you continue to seek. thank you for you honesty & humility in your company. some of the financial tips have been helpful, but your ability to be honest about what you know & what you seek is the real attraction in your writing.
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J.D. read pages 261 to 263 in The Adventure of Self-Discovery. These few pages can be read for free on Google Books. It might shine some light on the dynamics you’re talking about. Here’s an excerpt;
“A failure to achieve a specific goal from which satisfaction was expected perpetuates the self-deceptive belief that happiness depends on external factors. In this case, the individual typically presumes that success would have made a difference. When the goal is achieve, it typically does not bring the psychological results that was expected. However, this is not usually interpreted as an indication that the strategy linking happiness to success has failed. It is attributed to the fact that the goal was not sufficiently ambitious or that a wrong choice of the goal was made. The resulting frustration will then generate new plans or more ambitious ones of the same nature.“
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when I read this post I thought, oh, something must be done — you shouldn’t have to work 60 hours a week!! A number of sites that I admire take the weekend off — and GRS is certainly rich enough in stored content, forums, etc, that even we dedicated readers could probably handle not having a new post every day…
Another thought: in my mind, “Getting Rich Slowly” means more than being rich in monetary wealth, it also means getting rich in time — so one part of the third stage is to explore how we manage time, which is just as difficult as managing money… lots of room for new posts that help to combine money management and time management…
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Hi JD,
I can see a book developing out of this. Any thoughts?
Cheers,
Jeremy
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@Jeremy Day
Well, since writing this piece, I’ve been discussing with Kris about adopting my existing metaphor/framework of “building a house” to incorporate the “third stage”. This is “living in and maintaining the house”. It means you can’t give up the habits you developed before, but there are other things you do to enjoy the experience.
And I’ve also talked with my agent about using this as the basis for a book proposal. We’re exploring it.
Look for a series of posts on this subject in March. I’m going to map out what the stages are and how they relate to each other. It’s going to be “thinking out loud”, but it should be fun.
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Welcome to the first stage of investing!
JD,
As your friend John pointed out, you have made the transition to an Investor. IMO you are making a sigificant transition, instead of continuing on to the “next phase” of personal finance. Just as you have described a personal finance lifecycle, there’s an Investment lifecycle (accumulation, consolidation, “retirement” [...I hate that word...], and gifting). The good news is that you have a solid foundation of clear goals and values to provide both the “what” and the “why” as you begin investing. Some of your readers have commented how strange and confusing the Investment world is… I hope you can provide a bridge between the two worlds.
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“The goal is to live a life in which we can do and have the things we want — by making conscious choices. Money is a tool for reaching that goal.”
Dear Friend, you need to understand everything about get ritch slowly,:P happyness comes from meditation, as as you grow older you may or may not learn things that is possible to realice with meditation, there is one other way to get this gods knowlage
, and alot earlier if you want, with meditation!!!, everything you have typed on your webplace I already know, and im not to old, pleas write a story about meditation and realisation of eveything, i believe there is the connection you and everybody else are searching of, if you dont fint this message that ok, some people never find themself to, there is only one clear view of the world, and thats when you clear all thoughts and after time answers will come how you to take care of yourself and be happy. When you meditated alot and increase all chakras you know what im talking about. there is something more behind everything meditation connectes everything about money
and living into a CLEAR concious life that only meditation can make better. The world will get enlightened, some say as early as 2012, who knows, good changes are always welcome, right?
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What a great, interesting question you’re asking in this post. I’d love to hear more about this!!
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What a deep and profound piece. As someone who’s still working on the second stage of personal finance, I’ve been working hard to get myself in a situation to ask ‘what’s next?’ Good to know that others are facing the same existential quandaries.
As for the question of the third stage, I think there are many different ‘third stages’, depending on the particular people. While there are few paths to get out of debt or start investing, there are hundreds of destinations to which people wish to journey. Some people want to travel the world, some people want to take on their dream jobs, others desire the opportunity to rest and relax, and still others want to spread their wealth to the less fortunate. Each of these ‘third stages’ are equally valid, and each requires different considerations and planning, which is why there are hundreds of books on how to get out of debt or start investing, and few on ‘what next?’
Best wishes on finding your own brand of ‘what’s next’, and I anticipate a number of good posts as you find your way through this new territory.
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I strongly agree with the idea that the third stage should not be toys. It should be Giving Back. Giving at least 10% to those in greater need; substantially sharing our discretionary resources, financial and/or otherwise (and FYI, I’m an atheist). Your Money or Your Life talks about this well, if I recall.
I’m not saying there should never be toys. The 4th stage can be toys.
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Excellent article! I think this message gets lost in most personal finance blogs in the midst of savings, getting out of debt and making more money… In the end, money is just a tool to help live life…
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Yet again you have adequately expressed in eloquent words some of the things I’ve been saying, and have said before at Master Your Card. While I believe the basics of finance are important, I don’t believe that money itself is ever the goal. The goal is always how that money can improve our lives and well-being, and it’s about having satisfying and fulfilling relationships with those around us.
Unfortunately, we often get tangled up in our beliefs that we must live frugal and not spend on anything for the rest of our lives. What’s the point of that? Yes, we need to be responsible – pay bills on time, keep an emergency fund, tap out retirement accounts, etc. – but if you’re doing that already and still have funds left over, you’ve reached the “What next” stage and you have to figure out what your dream is.
I’m almost there. I’m so close I can taste it. I want to travel, and I want to do it before I’m too old to properly enjoy it. I want to write beautiful stories about the places I visit. That’s my “why.” That’s why I work as hard as I do to stay ahead of the game. Maybe that’s not a worthy goal to someone else, but it is to me. It’s what I want to do. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is why they call it PERSONAL finance.
Great post, J.D.! I look forward to the new direction as you learn what your next steps are.
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I’ve noticed too that most books and blogs are directed to people who are in debt, but never really go into detail about what to do after you’re out of debt and have begun accumulating wealth.
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Looking forward to being along for the journey.
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I’ve noticed that a lot of personal finance bloggers focus on the debt elimination. Maybe it’s because it’s where they’ve been or what they feel that their readers need. I haven’t been able to write about it very much, and I’m particularly happy about it in retrospect.
I got well into the 2nd stage when I realized that, doing what I was doing, I wouldn’t get to the third stage for a long time… too long than I was willing to spend. Also, I felt that economic factors in the United States might push me from the later 2nd stage to the early 2nd stage.
I’m sure that’s what a lot of new retirees are feeling right now. Will they get to that third stage with the way their investments have gone? I doesn’t seem like it will for some time.
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Congratulations! I envy you. We were moving swiftly towards this third stage before I lost my job last year, and now we’re running through our savings like water. I feel like no matter how much we sacrifice and save, something always comes along to tear us back down to square one.
@Frank, if you’re a regular reader, you’d know that JD and Kris aren’t worried about saving for their kids’ weddings. Neutering took care of it. :p
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I am way behind on my feed reading and just came across this.
First, congrats. Quite the accomplishment.
Second, I completely agree. Too often we focus on the process and the frugality. It reminds me of the 93 year old man that froze to death in his own home recently — while leaving $500k to the local hospital.
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First, thank you for being so open and honest about some monumental life questions you have started asking yourself.
I think you’re saying that Money isn’t everything. I agree. Money can’t buy happiness.
But Stuff can’t buy happiness either.
Once we have our own house in order, I think it’s time to start looking outward.
Maybe it’s time to have kids. Or start funding your favorite charities. Micro-lending is really cool in how it not only helps people but also makes connections between them. See kiva.org
Giving like this will be much more fulfilling than just amassing more Stuff.
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JD,
Thanks for the great post and welcome to the rest of your life.
I’m in the same boat I’ve nailed the basics and have put in place 95% of my plans. Yet there’s one problem, I might just complete redo my plan to retire at 45. Perhaps I just semi-retire instead at 40. I’m no longer sure, but it should be fun figuring it all out.
Best of luck,
Tim
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I would submit that we have it backwards; the third stage should be the first stage. Stages 1 & 2 are about learning the what the tools are and then making a plan. The third stage is about why we do this. I believe we should start there. And the “why” can and does change; people marry, divorce, have children, suffer great losses and great joy. All these things affect that third stage. How we do things (our values) often stay the same but why we do things (our purpose) can and does change through life’s journey. An example; if one was an honest accountant and they chuck it all to be a winemaker, they will likely be an honest winemaker. Also, the why informs the how. If all I want to do is pile up money with no purpose, I may not be concerned about how I pile it up.
Thank you for your feed. This is great stuff and I think warrants serious consideration.
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Excellent post! The third stage is what I like to call Leaving a Legacy. What will your legacy in life be? Will it be that you were a penny pincher and never helped anyone? Or will it be that you were a highly organized person are were able to help others through your success? Getting to a point where you can start worrying about society as a whole instead of your own little world is so important! Bill Gates with the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation and Warren Buffett with his huge personal donations are both great examples.
So, the third stage is giving. Giving of yourself and your time. Making this world a better place.
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The first two stages make sense to me, and I’ve pretty much passed through them. However, in my case at least, there’s a third and fourth stage.
The third stage does involve going beyond the basics, but requires that I remain actively engaged with them lest I lapse somehow or get too comfortably in a rut. Though I’m past the basics, I’m still trying to build wealth and get to a point where my assets and net worth will sustain me. There is a bit of the “what now?” in all of this, but the question is also “how do I keep it going and enjoy life more fully as long as I have to work for an income?”
Stage Four for me is more fully the “What next?” stage as described above. For me, this will happen (I hope) when I retire, after I’ve built the wealth needed for financial independence. The basics will still be important, but it will be in the context of living off of what I hope to have.
In any case, I agree that once the basics are covered, it’s good to develop a bit more fun into the budget. But as far as actually building wealth goes, that’ll take a couple of decades or so.
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I agree. It’s all about finding the right balance. Knowing when to and when not to spend, knowing when to work and when to socialize etc. Look forward to reading more on this.
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JD, this is a great post and I’m really interested in following what you and other GRS readers have to say! I think you got it spot on that the three high-level steps you’ve highlighted sets a great framework to live a meaningful life.
Keep up the great work!
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There is a dearth of 3rd stage information on the internet so you would be helping a great many of us by focusing on 3rd stage issues!
I’ve been looking for 3 types of 3rd stage articles:
1. “My Story” or “Our Story”. I devoured 2nd stage stories on how people got through the 2nd stage, the problems they overcame, how they overcame the problems, what to expect, how they wish they had done things differently, etc. I had simply never fathomed a different way of life so I needed some examples.
The 3rd stage stories I find are not detailed. They simply say, “I’m happier now. I now volunteer 5 hours a week.” Ooh. What are some of the problems you’ve encountered? How did you slip back into Stage 2? How did you getting back out of Stage 2 this time differ than the first time? What are you doing to ensure no more slip-ups? How do you spend your time differently? What are your extracurriculars now? How do you give more (time/money)? How has your budget changed? How has your cashflow changed? Are you less worried now? Or have your worries just shifted? How has your emotional well-being changed? How would you have approached your first years at Stage 3 differently? What are problem areas to be prepared for (aside from the common problem of slipping back into your old spending habits)? A very important one: What is your definition of 3rd stage? (Mine is being debt free including the house with a year’s living expenses saved and 2 newer cars. Stage 3 for me is not being independently wealthy). What are your 3rd stage goals? What motivates you now? I’m having trouble with this one. I don’t want a negative motivation such as: “If I spend too much money, I’ll end up back where I started.” There has to be a positive way.
2. 3rd stage self-talk. My Stage 1 self-talk was “Wow. I really can do this. It IS possible.” My Stage 2 self-talk (I was worried about not having enough retirement savings because I had waited so long to start saving) is “Okay. If I buy this Apple product, I will have to raid the money I would normally put in retirement, which will mean I’m not only paying $300 out of pocket, but $300 plus the amount I now have to pay Uncle Sam plus $300 that my company won’t match (My company matches dollar for dollar up to $900 a year. Then nothing.) Do I really want to spend $650 (or whatever the amount is)?” or “Buying this item will delay my getting-out-of-debt date by X number of days. Is it worth it?” Sometimes it was worth it, most of the times not. I desperately need different self-talk strategies to stay in control and to stay on target.
3. How does your perspective change? My Stage 1 perspective change was realizing my debt ways was not the only way to live. My Stage 2 perspective change was just being aware of how my small actions affect my money and my happiness. I felt more in control. For example, getting rid of the clutter put money in my pocket from its sale and from me thinking in the store “Will this be clutter or will I love it?” Having less clutter made me feel less stressed and claustrophobic and much happier.
There is so much more I want to learn about Stage 3! You have a great website. thanks for your hard work!
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I guess my blog could be construed as a 3rd/4th stage blog and people are right: There are not as many of those blogs, at least compared to the credit card/debt/index investing/coupon clipping blogs
It is somewhat difficult to order the stages the way I think you want to do. For instance, if you are in debt, there is only one way out: work. Once you are out of debt, you have more than one way out. To pick one path though, my path, I would say stage 3 is decoupling yourself from your job. You say you work 60 hours a week. Is it possible that if you worked less, your blog would not be as remunerative? Decoupling from the job means financial independence, so the next step is supporting yourself entirely from passive income.
It also means that you do not identify yourself with your job and that can be a tough transition. It means that you have to find out who you are … rather than what you do from 9-5.
Being FI means that you are not in debt to your stomach so to speak, that is, you would not need to work to live. The 4th stage is decoupling yourself from money. You can do that by either having a lot of money in which case you have to battle the when is enough enough monster or you can find ways to live that does not require money in the same way that most people are used to. Stage 3 and 4 can be pursued simultaneously.
I think there are stages beyond this. I will think about it.
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I never bought anything for which I didn’t have money for. I managed to save 50% of my pay check for quite some time before losing interest in savings. Since I am not much of a risk-taker, I never invested in stocks other than my 401(k) to match my company fully. My car is paid off, I am in my late 20′s and I live in a rental apartment. I don’t have a specifically named emergency fund, but my healthy cash reserve that I have should be enough for surviving at least 3 years in the current scenario. For the past few months, I have been greatly debating why I should save any more, even 10% or 20%. Numbers in the bank don’t bring me any more happiness. So I have gone all out to spend 10-15% of my income on things that I currently think I enjoy. I guess I am in the third stage as you say. One strong debate I currently have is, if i don’t spend money on things I enjoy now, later I might not have the age to enjoy even though I accumulate money. All the blogs out there say about the first two stages and I am really really interested in knowing about the third stage. Looking forward to your posts JD…
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JD I lost my mother about a month ago. I’m out of debt and about ready to start investing in IRA again. I’m inheriting money … enough that I’ll be at the third stage very, very soon. After all the scrapping I’ve been doing over the past several years, I’ll be at a place financially I’ve never been before. It’s a little scary. I know what to do with $10K-$15K of it. The rest, I have no idea …
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I look forward to hearing more about the “next stage” as that’s where I am at right now. On a side note, something I’ve been looking into is putting our emergency fund into a conservative mutual fund. I did some searching on your site, but didn’t find anything addressing this. Have you considered this? Is this a bad idea for any reason? We still plan to have a few thousand dollars in our regular savings account for immediate emergencies, but most things we thought of that would require using this money would allow a few days to get at it. Any thoughts would be appreciated.
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when I was in the lowest of my life, I was asking ‘whats next?’ when things are all settled, I ask, ‘which next ?’ This slight difference way of asking may completely put one into a totally different paradigm, good luck finding your nexts.
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Regarding step 3 I feel like I am just trying to get back to the path I was on when young. When young I was an unconscious “frugal” person. I was fully involved in my work and hobbies and consequently spent very little but had a very full life. But stuff happens. Over a space of 6 years 9/11 happened, I had a medical situation, had a child. Lost my job, got a new one. Had a great boss who died. Had a second kid, another job. I felt I did not have the energy for my original hobbies, so basically web surfing and shopping substituted for those passions. I’ve come full circle, weaned myself off most of the bad habits, as of this week paid off the debt. I am like a baby having to relearn the good habits I originally had that I had forgotten. But once those habits are automatized, it gives one the freedom to move onto something else. And I’m looking forward to whatever that may be, because with life, once something is resolved, the next question is, what’s next?
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I’ve often wondered what I would do if suddenly tomorrow I had my six month emergency savings in the bank, a comfortable retirement savings started and all that. The only thing that really appeals to me, I confess is that I would really love to switch to an “easier” lifestyle and spend my days drawing, taking photographs (something I haven’t had time for in years, really) and just relax and live how I want to live.
Unfortunately it doesn’t always work that way so in the meantime I’ll just work and save and get there slowly but surely.
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I am not sure where you are heading with your “What Next?” article. It seems you are looking for meaning in your existence. At least that is the impression I got when I started reading your article. However, later on, you qualify it and talk about “What next after you have mastered the basics of personal finance?”
I have always looked at mastering personal finance as means to achieving my goals. It seems for you it became your ‘end’ as well.
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JD – I’ve been following your blog for the past week, and I’m thrilled to have found it. Considering personal finance consulting myself and would enjoy talking with you, as I believe you’re in Portland. I too am at Stage 3, despite my current unemployment…ever thought of hiring someone to help reduce your 60 hour work week?
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Over the past year or so I have felt something shift within me as I began to understand that there is a stage beyond acquisition of money and a lifestyle of frugality. It all has to have a purpose. I picked up “The Seven Stages of Money Maturity” by George Kinder to help find answers. I thought that there was something wrong with me for feeling this way. Then I realized that my feelings were all about changing philosophies about life and money. I recently published an article on the internet about this very thing: developing a sustainable philosophy about money. I am so glad I am not alone.
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I love this post! I am not at the third stage yet. I am preparing for it in seven years. My goals are to pay off my rental and retire from the military at 45 years old. Once I am there, I can take a sabbatical and travel and/or work PT (for health benefits).
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Can you post the link to the other 2 “stage” articles connected to this ‘what’s next’ article
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Great Post!
For me I think the third stage will be dropping down my hours at my day job (or if I’m lucky, my hours in my self employed life) to spend more time focussing on what I call my “life’s work” – the projects I do because they make a difference and I find joy and pleasure in doing them. For me that’s the ultimate goal. I am a hard worker by nature and would go crazy without a project .. but I’d like to spend less time earning a living and more time on my projects.
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I have read your column for quite some time now. My partner and I are still in the second (and sometimes we slip back to the first) stage of pf. It’s all about learning. Continually. I look forward to seeing what stage 3 holds for us…and I’m going to enjoy being motivated by what stage 3 holds for you.
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