Thanks……I used spell check but maybe I should upgrade to a better version!

I appreciate your point. I wrote this article about an isolated event that happened several years ago. Your story is similar to my own. This type of thing can happen to most any of us.

To your point. I find it fascinating when a few folks find little value in certain posts. I have enjoyed all the guest posts. Even though I may not relate to the specific example of each writer, I certainly have learned something from each one – and even more from the comments.

Having said that….it’s not a point I’ll argue. To each his/her own. But I agree with your sentiments….

I really think that’s the true “gold” at GRS.

I was in a similar situation specifically one time, all my friends are frugal like I am, but I was out with my husband’s friend who is a big shopper. She was purchasing this and that at the mall and I got tired of just walking with her and watching her buy things, so I started buying things too. Very unusual for me since I usually shop at the Salvation Army and so anything for over $15 gives me sticker shock, clothingwise. She seemed pleased and said “quinsy, I never knew you were so into shopping.” Well, I’m not… I got home and realized my mistake, and that I already had plenty of clothes, and that I could buy similar things just as easily at Salvation Army for $5. I snuck back to the mall the next day and returned everything.

I think if you realize you’ve made an error, be sure to hang on the receipts and you can always return items so you don’t lose face right in front of your friends (if like me you were silly enough not to just stick to being frugal all along). Also, if you end up at a restaurant that’s too expensive, you can split a meal with your spouse or say “oh, what a shame, I just ate or I’m not feeling well right now, so I’m just going to stick to a soup or salad.”

For those commenting just to say that “they’re not interested in any of these posts.” What are you doing on this blog then? This is the kind of thing we talk about. If you don’t like it, move on. Or at least provide constructive feedback about what you would like to see on the blog. Come on.

None of us need to be cowering in fear of what our friends might think of us if we dare to reveal that we can’t afford to keep up with what may be nothing more than a spending contest.

Going along to get along is a poor way to live life.

If you can’t help but give in to peer pressure, make sure you’re associating with the right peers.

When women would come in (it was an all-women’s shoe store) with their friends, they made much better choices. They probably also purchased more often. But they didn’t buy uncomfortable shoes, ever. They also looked better in the shoes they did buy. Probably, if they were browsing with others in tow, they only asked to try on shoes they were truly interested in buying (whereas the shoe salesgirl’s worst nightmare is the woman who wants to play triesies on 6 different pairs, or more, with no intention to buy — no joke).

#62 + #64 — can you explain why not?

I’m sure your friends wouldn’t do this, but for any con man worth his salt it’s easy to mark their card and ensure it’s in the middle of the stack so they don’t end up paying. If they only do this once out of 6 times, it cuts their bill by 17% over time. If they “shuffle” every time, they never pay!

I’d recommend cutting out the payment game, and pay only for what you eat and drink.

I really hate it when that happens. How have you dealt with those kinds of situations in the past?

It can be worse if you have kids and say you and your buddy go out to the ball game with the little ones. Your friend buys his kid a jersey at the stadium, and your kid likes it, and wants you to buy him one too, but you know you can get it much cheaper at the local sports store or online. Yet your kid is insistent and your friend sees this and says something like, “give the kid a break he’s a fan.” If you don’t buy it you’ll look like a cheapskate in front of you friend and to your kid as well.

Situations like these are really tough to deal with.

When I’m out with this same friend at a bar, we drink whatever is on special. Period. I don’t bother with most drink specials when by myself or with others.

So I think I need to spend more time with her because I come away having a blast but without spending much or any money at all. She’s a good type of friend to have.

With regards to the dinners-out with friends: we usually all pay for ourselves and go to inexpensive restaurants.

Last year, I quit my job to go back to University. My old colleagues had a dinner a few months after that and invited me along. I talked to the organizer about my finances and we agreed that I would pay for myself and that the rest would share the bill. I had fries and a coke. As the rest were drinking cocktails and specialty beers, this saved me around €30 ($45)!

But I grew up dirt poor and was mocked for it on a regular basis, so I learned at a young age to not care about other people’s opinions.

If my friend wasn’t into watches, I would NEVER dream of spending more than $500 bucks on a watch! Rich friends blow holes in people’s budgets. Beware!

Rgds,

RB
RB30RB40

I have since stopped hanging out with that crowd. My good friends and I like to just sit around, watch bad kung fu movies, and drink beer. Good times, though we do splurge on the good beer.

Of course, all of my frugality goes out the window when one of my family members wistfully sighs that they’d love that new dress/expensive sushi dinner/random thing. I won’t do any of that for myself, but I am a sucker for them and they know it.

When we would go shopping, we’d head straight for the designer department at Saks. She would buy designer outfits–NOT on sale–like they were thrift-store specials. Being the malleable type, I would end up trying some of the stuff on and ultimately (because it DID look good on me) buying far more than I could afford.

Then when I got it home, I’d think “what on EARTH were you doing?” And I’d wrap the stuff up and take it right back to the store.

This would give me the social shopping experience at, unknown to my friend, no cost.

Often the stuff I’d returned after having bought it at full price would later show up on the sale rack. At the sale prices, I could afford it. I still have a couple of outfits acquired in that roundabout way…she has no idea I didn’t pony up the full price for them.

This is a situation where it may pay to be a leader!