I can’t afford to buy for a lot of people at once, so I make a point of not giving christmas gifts to many people. They will get enough stuff at christmas to drown in, without my contribution. I do place importance on birthdays, especially the ones near christmas, which get submerged.

However, I take my nieces to the pantomime every year. They’re talking about it for weeks, sometimes months afterwards, and it’s the kind of treat their harassed parents don’t have freedom to give them. Nothing I could afford to buy would make that big an impression on them.

Sometimes it goes wrong, though: I once bought entrance tickets (wedding present) to an attraction I knew the recipients would really enjoy. Weeks after the tickets expired, I got a polite thank you for the tickets to the recycling centre. It could have been worse: they could have mistaken it for a sewage farm.

I once gave my (now ex-) husband a balloon ride. That was a hoot! Later I gave him a ride in a glider, which he also seemed to enjoy.

When asked what he wanted for Christmas, he would invariably say “money.” Grr! So, one Christmas I took my paycheck to the bank, had it cashed out in one-dollar bills, packed it into a box, and wrapped it as his present.

That was the last time he asked for money. Then he started asking for real estate.

Agreed with Marie about the passive-aggressive uses of charitable donations. Really: who are we to decide what will be donated in someone else’s name? Unless you know the person has a favorite charity, it’s better to ask her or him where to donate. Some people’s favorite charity is their bank account…

The experience and memory is worth a lot more than STUFF to me..

But there are others who clearly don’t feel the same way

And I’ve also highlighted the Major Holiday Busters Part 1 that most people experience. (Part 2 coming)

I have been scanning old photos (you know, before digital camaras?). I also have very old family photos. When I am done scanning, I am planning on making (or having made) photo albums for the rest of my family. Before digital, pictures weren’t shared quite as much. They will enjoy having pictures of when we were kids, or their own children, or of their great grandparents.

As someone who just graduated from college, I have to agree with the coffee, consumables gifts for students.

As a foodie I would love to recieve food items that I normally wouldn’t buy for myself. Good quality balsamic vinegar, olive oil, saffron, etc. Things that when I look at the budget and the grocery list I have to make choices about. No, it doesn’t have to be the $100 bottle of balsamic, since I’m only buying the $5 bottle…pretty much anything would be better:)

Gardeners appreciate gift certificates too! We don’t always have a use for plants, seeds, etc. If your buying tools make sure they are good quality and not something they already have,or they will turn into “stuff.” We used to buy my grandmother GCs to her favorite nursery. They were her favorite gifts! Every year she turned them into flowers for her garden. At past 80 she had all the stuff she needed, but had to watch her budget. It helped her to afford what she still loved.

We do like to teach our kids about giving, so we chose to start a new tradition where everyone buys a gift for each member of the immediate family. This year they are saving their allowances to purchase gifts. It’s wonderful to see them choose something so thoughtfully for each other.

I like to give a receive consumables like food, craft items for the kids, etc. or memberships since we can use those again and again.

We also shop for a child or family in need each year.

The gift I really want? To be debt-free, but I think it may take until next Christmas to get there.

Some examples of experiences that I’ve been given:
Membership to the local Aquarium
Adopted Zoo Animal — I was a llama mama!
Cowgirl Creamery Cheese Club Membership
Wine Club Membership — This one was awesome!
Concert Tix
Safari Trip for 2 at Safari West — Perhaps my favorite!

An idea that is always nice and from the heart is making a donation to an organization that is meaningful to that person on their behalf. One year for Christmas I adopted animals for all of my friends through the World Wildlife Fund and another year we purchased animals through Heifer International and gave that to all of our long distance family members.

Perhaps the best experience I ever gave was surprising my mother with a trip to Disneyland. She was 57 the first time she ever stepped foot in a Disney park, and even though it rained on us most of the time, we had a blast and she had the biggest smile on her face the whole day!

My mother was always putting things “someplace special” and then forgetting where the special place was. One year I was desparate for a gift and out of ideas. The lightbulb went off. I wrapped the biggest box I could find, in the fanciest manner I could manage, and labeled it “Someplace Special.” She used it for 15 years before it finally disintegrated. I don’t usually get that lucky with ideas, though.

My family has a tradition of sometimes giving money. The recipient is to use the gift for something special – no paying the electric bill – and then telling the giver all about the special thing. One year my special thing was a 3 day group lecture-and-tour of a historic battlefield. Not only did I thoroughly enjoy it, I now understand US history better.

Several other times we tried to get together (sis lives 1 and 1/2 hours north of us and mom lives 1 and 1/2 hours south of us), but since my sister has 2 young kids under 5 (my youngest is 9), she always has a sitter problem; to make matters worse, someone always gets sick at the worst time (flu at Christmas, New Year’s, what have you). My sister’s husband travels a lot and my husband works shift work, so their schedules are often conflicting!

There are also so many other obligations during the holidays like work parties, school concerts, piano recitals, fundraising events, church events and planning, decorating, shopping, cleaning, baking; it’s way too much for one person to have to do in a month or so (our husbands tend to do the bare minimun all year long!).

So many good intentions that never pan out is what frustrates me–not to mention the hundreds of dollars to have to spend for that ‘experience’. This year we decided that we would only give the kids gifts, no adult gifts…we’re old enough to buy for ourselves and are satisfied with just spending a holiday together at last!!!!

BTW where did you get the picture of the cat? it’s a spitting image of my moggy, Milo!

Now that I’m married, I let my husband do most of the giving because it still feels awkward and unnatural to me.
Of course, it feels just as weird receiving gifts from people who aren’t my parents (I don’t even receive gifts from my parents anymore since I’m not a kid anymore).

And I have to say I’m not the type to like giving something because it’s the proper time to. When I see something a friend or family would enjoy, I get it for them right away. It could be December, I’m still not going to wait until Christmas to give it to them.

Anyway, I realise my personal experience is different from most. And I do think the gifts you mentionned really are great ieas that people would enjoy more than gifts that were bought because “you gotta buy something”.
I do agree with what someone else said though, that most of these are kinda expensive, and might not be in everyone’s budget (especially if you need to get one for everyone you know).

Like Cara, I have in-laws who are all about the stuff. They seem to take it personally if I say I don’t want any THINGS. In the interest of family harmony, I’ve decided to drop it.

We finally came to our senses and realized we could spend all the money in the world on each other and it wouldn’t bring us closer to one another.

Since then, we give each other the gift of time. There is nothing more precious in either one of our lives, so each Christams, we plan dates throughout the year that come hell or high water, we will spend those dates together.

It has really strengthened our marriage

As a variation on this, I have started a Google “wish list” for our family of 4. Each of us has access to it and can add or delete items from this list at any time. That way, I’m hopeful that if we do opt to shop, we’ll be getting items that the person truly desires rather than something that turns into dust-gathering clutter (like the digital photo frame from last Christmas…)

My favorite family Christmas tradition is Bingo where there’s very little money spent up front, loads of laughs, every single person can participate, and we’re all enjoying time together. Nothing can beat it!

I’ve given gift cards to local movie theaters for families of employees, with gift cards for soda and popcorn.

I’ve taken my parents out to dinners and shows.

I’ve bought ballet tickets for my entire family to see something special, from “Nutcracker”to “Swan Lake.”

This year, husband and I will see a Broadway show (we live in metro NYC) instead of getting tangible gifts.

As for myself, last year I told everyone that I wanted to take cooking classes, and said that if they didn’t know what to get me, money to go toward the classes would be great. All my siblings and my mother-in-law gave toward the cause, and I don’t think that any of them were affronted that I asked for money. I made sure to gush about the cooking classes in my thank you note, so that they understood that I really appreciated the gift.

And I often do a lot of homemade gifts. They’re useful and inexpensive. Last year our budget was very tight for Christmas, so I made some homemade hot chocolate mix (tons of recipes online) and packed it into nice, decorated mason jars for our friends. It was a hit!

One warning to those considering buying a gift for gardeners: I am a gardener, and sometimes I receive plants as gifts and don’t have a good spot to put them in my yard. If you have an idea of what plants the recipient could actually use, that would help.