Anyway, I bristle at both of the two extremes…”you must be rich if you pay people to do things for you, so you’d better tip really well” and “people do things for me because I pay them. Why would I pay more?”

You know that bonus or that gift or those hours you get off during the holidays, or even just the fact that you get to wear a holiday shirt and jeans to work…? THAT feeling. THAT is why you tip. To anyone else out there who has ever received a surprise holiday tip, or even a surprisingly generous everyday tip…you know that delight…so you tip someone who will appreciate it; someone who means something to you.

Or don’t tip. Whatever. I doubt many people would be shocked NOT to receive a tip.

I think that’s smart. Is your babysitter going to up and steal your kid because you didn’t leave a tip at Christmas? No, I can’t see that happening, and hopefully you checked them out. But when you’re a parent, you’re paranoid about everything, and I can see the logic of trying to make sure the people who take care of your family are happy.

I’ll add one more service person to the list of those to consider tipping – the farrier (that’s a horseshoer). We finally found a reliable one – we definitely want to keep him!

I have occasionally done holiday tipping—I’ve always looked at it as a holiday bonus for service providers where the direct recipient of the service is not the company they work for. For example, I’m a book editor and I would be shocked if a reader sent me a holiday tip for the work I do because my work flows back into the publishing process and the company I work for. (Though, on occasion, we have had individual authors send holiday gifts as thank yous for editing work.)

However, if the service provider is someone I would normally tip as part of their service (e.g., hairdresser or parking attendant) I do not give an additional bonus at the holidays. A babysitter or housekeeper would probably be an exception, but since I don’t use either of those services, it’s moot.

For the first time in years it seems we have a regular postal carrier (and we actually get our mail!). I see her every morning as I leave for work and we exchange greetings, so I will probably give our postal carrier something this year. My parents used to tip the rubbish collectors each year, but that was back when they had to get out of the truck, lift the can, and actually interact with people. Nowadays, instead of a 2-person team it’s usually just 1 and they sit in the cab of the truck operating levers that do all the physical work for them and there’s no need to get out of the truck and run the risk of actually having to talk to anyone. While it’s still a service, it is so automated I don’t feel compelled to give a bonus.

I dont tip because its expected but because I appreciate these people and the value that they add to my life.

Most people on the receiving side of tipping are pretty flush this time of year because of the trend toward holidy specific tipping. But it might be better to wait until Jan or Feb, when our own cash flow is back to normal, and tip workers tips are down. You can even give it to them in a Christmas envelope, and maybe even a litte more than you could at the holiday because you don’t have money going out all over the place.

Bet that’ll be appreciated every bit as much as the holiday tips!

It gets expensive but you learn to include it in your yearly budgeting.

Realistically though, many people are having a tough time making ends meet in this deep Recession. If you aren’t getting a bonus or a raise this year, its hard to want to turn around and dole out dozens of holiday tips.

If everyone gave them that much, they’d have enough to buy a new tv and not just a “little bit” extra. Other people don’t have the time to have “lots and lots” of potential clients (like housekeepers/nannies), so the gift would be naturally bigger. At least, I’d assume that.

But I come from a family that never gave out tips, though I thought a small tip to the mailman or newspaper person would be neat, but I mean, small like $5, figuring if “everyone did”, it would be a great Christmas bonus for them.

John DeFlumeri Jr

And @22 — obviously tipping is for the people who factor big in your world. Try not to take JD’s suggestions so literally. He’s not a tyrant trying to make you do things you don’t want to do. He says himself, in the article: “This is just a list of people who commonly receive holiday tips… Use your best judgment.”

I have heard from several people, in different neighborhoods that you should trip the trashman. And these neighborhoods are across the socioeconomic spectrum.

If we have a large amount of trash like spring cleaning day or leaf removal my dad will often be waiting for them on the curb, help them load it, and then tip them. We have thrown out couches, appliances, grills, and 40 bags of leaves and they have never left anything. That includes different drivers, they all seem to know my dad will take care of them and they make sure our stuff gets picked up.

I suppose I do have a postal worker but it seems to be always a different person and they all do a terrible job, so I’ve never really considered tipping them. Maybe my mail wouldn’t get shredded if I shelled out some cash…