This guest post from William is part of the “reader stories” feature here at Get Rich Slowly. Some reader stories contain general “how I did X” advice, and others are examples of how a GRS reader achieved financial success — or failure. These stories feature folks from all levels of financial maturity, and with all sorts of incomes.
My wife and I had some major awakenings in our lives at the end of 2008. In December, for example, as we approached our 7th anniversary, she was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis and one of our cats was diagnosed with lymphoma. Statistically, only 30% of individuals with MS are able to work, and my wife’s symptoms made it immediately clear that there was no guarantee she could work until retirement.
At the time our financial situation was pretty dire. Our money management had been a comedy of errors; neither of us was happy about our finances. We didn’t fight about money, but both of us worried about it so much that it constantly had a negative impact on every facet of our lives. Factoring in the medical concerns and the possibility we could lose nearly 35% of our income at any moment, it was clear we had to make changes.
The road to nowhere
To sum up the mistakes that got us in this situation:
- We had invested a massive amount of money into a failed business venture with some friends. We ended up supporting the company on credit cards for about 6 months before we finally pulled the plug. In hindsight, we should have stopped sooner, but the draw of working for ourselves and our perceived obligation to our friends clouded our vision and prevented us from making rational decisions about the business.
- While we were running this business, we were essentially supporting three other adults that were living with us, two of whom were partners in the business. The five of us lived together in a leased and very drafty house that we could barely afford, with utilities that skyrocketed beyond expectations. With only minimal support from one of our other business partners, we had a tough time to say the least.
- We were living paycheck to paycheck and our company paid us twice a month. Our employer then merged with another company that paid two weeks in arrears bi-weekly and on an alternate pay week. With a week’s notice we switched to the other company’s pay schedule leaving us with no paychecks for three weeks. We had to take the offered pay advances to make ends meet that month and the pay advances still did not add up to what our expected checks would have been.
- We financed brand new computers at about 5k for at least 21% APR (it may have been worse — I’m afraid to find out…)
- I wrecked our Toyota Camry, which we’d almost paid off. I ended up getting paid out from the insurance company about twice what it took to pay the car off. We made more money selling the car damaged than we would have if we had decided to repair it. We immediately squandered this good fortune by buying a new and more expensive car. (A decked-out 2006 Astro Black Mini Cooper — I figured J.D. would appreciate that!) Even though we made a hefty down payment, we were so excited that we were talked into almost every optional warranty their finance guy offered us, which quickly ballooned our payments.
- We did a lot of miscellaneous stupid things with money all the time, including eating out way too much (sometimes three times a day and snacks), buying stuff we didn’t need (we played too much World of Warcraft, and I’m a toy-a-holic like J.D. is a comic-a-holic), buying tons of DVDs and CDs, and not saving a penny.
- To make matters worse, we bought a brand new house, upgraded every possible option during construction, and needed all new appliances (purchased with credit cards) since we had none of our own because we’d always been renters.
We had a great credit score and no savings. Before we knew it, we had racked up well over $40,000 in credit card debt, a $21,000 car loan, and a $180,000 mortgage. Every dime we made went towards credit card balances that were still slowly increasing. My wife and I sat down and decided we needed to fix our problems. We needed to get out of debt.
Turning things around
My wife and I came up with an aggressive plan that would require a lot of discipline. Fortunately, we both bring home a fair salary, so we thought it would be reasonable to expect that we could at least wipe out most of the credit card debt within two years.
Throughout 2009, we were hit with some major expenses, but we kept positive and, most importantly, kept hacking away at the mountain using the debt snowball method. We were able to put $10,000 towards our debt right away with tax returns, a bonus, and an extra paycheck in January. But that progress was immediately wiped out between doctor’s bills for my wife and vet hospitalization bills for our sick cat.
My wife decided she was going to take advantage of the backlog at work and start working as much overtime as she could. For the rest of 2009, she worked 70-80 hour weeks, which kept us on top of the medical bills for her and the cat, and helped us make progress knocking out the debt. Since I’m salaried and couldn’t help out with overtime, I decided I’d get rid of all of the crap we had accumulated with our bad finance habits that we didn’t need or use. We ended up making over $2,000 off of eBay auctions and donated over $2,000 in items to charity.
I’d guess we paid $10,000 in her medical expenses and probably close to $30,000 for the cat over the course of the 2009. I’m sure some folks will find how much we spent on our cat a little nuts, but it all goes back to what you say about quality of life. We have no children and loved the cat. At the end of the day, the only reason we care about the money is to bring us happiness, and the memories we bought in the extra year we had with him were well worth the delay in meeting our goals.
In spite of everything, we’re currently sitting at $10,000 in credit card debt, we both repaid our work advances, and our car is paid off. With any luck, we’ll be completely debt-free except for our house in a few more months! Our company was purchased earlier this year, and of course their paydays are off from ours, resulting in a significant pay delay. I can’t tell you how great it was to not have to take pay advances this time!
Pathway to the future
We have no plans to stop our progress! Last year when our company started matching 401(k) contributions, we put aside the minimum amounts to get full matches and opened an investors savings account to start saving toward an emergency fund.
When we finish saving the full amount in our emergency fund, our next goals are:
- Invest in several index funds.
- Start our maximum contributions to a Roth IRA.
- Establish a 5-year CD ladder.
- Start taking yearly vacations! We haven’t had a real vacation to ourselves since our honeymoon over 9 years ago.
- Enjoy life debt-free!
I attribute a lot of our decisions and progress to the advice from Get Rich Slowly. When we finally realized something had to be done, we were totally lost. I asked around and searched for sound financial advice from people who had been in our situation. Finding this blog was a godsend. It really helped me to wrap my head around some simple concepts that have gotten us on the path to financial freedom. (And Mint got me the rest of the way!) We went from having no idea what to do, where to start, or even what our finances looked like to building a 10-year financial plan that is well underway.
Get Rich Slowly has made a huge impact in our lives. Thanks so much for sharing it with us, and thanks to the other readers for a great community.
Reminder: This is a story from one of your fellow readers. Please be nice. After nearly a decade of blogging, I have a thick skin, but it can be scary to put your story out in public for the first time. Remember that this guest author isn’t a professional writer, and is just learning about money like you are. So although you may disagree with his spending on his cat — I love my four cats, but don’t think I’d spend $30,000 to keep one alive — disagree respectfully, not rudely.
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Wow. $30,000 spent on a cat. I’m in the wrong line of work!
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Sounds like you are truly on your way towards debt-free freedom!
I appreciate your ability to cut your losses, as J.D. has mentioned before, many of us business owners and even consumers seem to keep investing money in hopeless aspirations & ideas that simply do not generate any real return, so we have to know when our time is up.
I also enjoy the fact that both you and your wife are making a concerted team-effort in tackling your debt, as you both realize with mounting health issues usually comes mounting fees which can result in crippling debt, so better to get an early jump on it.
Hopefully her diagnosis will be more positive than others, and I wish you the best on your journey!
PS. $30,000 on a cat appears outrageous at first, but being a psychology student, I can understand the concept that those without children do feel to compensate.
In all honesty, when is the last time someone tracked how much they spent on their child? The truth is, they likely wouldn’t want to see those numbers.
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$30,000 on a cat is way over the top. While I understand that you love the cat (and I have one of my own), it is still just a cat, and if your financial situation was that dire then you should not have spent that much trying to nurse it back to health.
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I always like to hear financial turnaround stories. If you can break out of the paycheck to paycheck mold, and build an emergency fund, it opens a lot of options.
I applaud the writer for taking a risk at a business, nothing wrong with trying something.
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My mother was diagnosed with relapse remitting MS in 2003. She currently works in sales and makes 100k + a year. Some days she is so exhausted she can only make one sales call that day and has to relax. Other days she is on fire!
She has been on Avonex for the last 6 years and has had minimal increase of MS lesions. Treatment and medications for MS is improving! But it is so smart to start setting aside additional funds for those treatments. Get on some great health insurance through work. They can’t deny for pre-existing conditions. Also if she can hang in there working for her company for 2 more years she will qualify for disability insurance payouts.
PS I hope you cat is doing better.
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Thanks for sharing your story! I’ve never been a business owner but I know I’m the kind of person who finds it hard to “give up”, even when it is the better financial decision, so I can understand that it must have been a difficult period.
Good luck and congratulations on your progress!
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I should have studied to become a vet
Always nice to hear another story of people who took destiny in their own hands and changed their lives for the better.
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Congratulations to you both for buckling down and making so much progress!
(I’d totally spend a lot of money on my dog. He is family.)
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William, thanks for sharing your story, and thanks for not shying away from sharing the amount you spent on your cat. You probably expect to get some less than understanding feedback for that decision. Well, just remember that when some stranger tells you what they think of your decisions, it tells you more about them than it does about you.
Some people say they love their pets but their actions speak differently when they fall on hard times, so it is always refreshing to see someone follow through on the commitment that I think is implicit in caring for a pet.
On a personal note, one of the things I have done as I attempt my own journey to financial security is set a target for my emergency fund that is much higher than most recommend – about 2 years worth of expenses. Why? In large part because I have several cats, and if they should get sick I want to be in the position of being able to pay for their care.
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First off, congratulations. This is a great accomplishment for you!
Second, I wanted to add in some of my own personal comments:
1. While it may seem strange to some people, you can get pet insurance. If your pet is like a child, then perhaps insure it as such.
2. I know that you are building an emergency fund, but with your wife’s condition, I would make that my priority over the credit cards. Forget about interest rates, etc, etc. Cash is king whenever you have no income coming in.
3. You might consider a second job, unless selling stuff on eBay is your second job?
4. I don’t know the interest rates on the car or the credit card, but you may have been better off paying down the credit cards first, then wait for the car.
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I appreciate hearing your and your wife’s approach to the debt and congratulate you on working so hard to get on top of it. Best wishes for her continued good health — and for your cat. Not a decision I would make, but then again, I have two kids and indeed spend a lot on them (sports and college). Good luck.
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$30,000 sounds like a lot, but it comes in drips and drops – an operation, follow up vet visits, medication, more vet visits, a medical test that requires an overnight stay, new medication – it adds up quickly. Pets are expensive. Our cat started drooling, and it was over $1000 to fix (he needed a rotten tooth pulled).
How many people take home a cute new puppy or kitten, and announce to their kids “Once the bills for this animal reach $10,000 we are going to have it put to sleep?” Do you keep track of the amounts on a spreadsheet on the fridge, counting down the dollars until the pet is too expensive? Most people make these decisions as they go along, and until you have a beloved pet with a chronic illness you can’t say what your decision will be.
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I told a client the other day that the cost of doing foreign body surgery to remove the sock from his dog’s stomach would be $1500-2000. (not my favorite part of the job.) He almost giggled a bit actually and said to me his late wife had to have a lung removed last year and he had just gotten the total bill. $1.8 million!! So it sounded like a bargain. I think it is easy to forget that without insurance medicine itself is quite expensive.
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William, good for you and your wife for making the turnaround!
For the people who are focusing on how much he spent on “just a cat”– everyone’s priorities and values are different. Just mentally cross that part out and substitute whatever / whoever is important enough to you that you would spend as much money as it took. That it was a cat for this author isn’t the point of the story.
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Come on people. Don’t berate the writer over the cat! It’s a lot of money, sure. Maybe you would have done differently. Different values, different priorities.
I would have done the same thing this person did. I am facing a similar situation with my cat. She has small cell lymphoma. My husband and I were both laid off from our jobs. The vet bills and medication are expensive but this is our cat–she is part of our family. She may have good quality of life for up to two years if the medication goes well. I hope that will happen because I don’t want to lose her so soon. Even two years is too soon but we were told that it wouldn’t be longer than that with this cancer.
Here is a person writing that there are two terrible diagnoses in the family, the wife and the cat. In the meantime, they have terrible financial problems. The fact that they are turning their financial problems around and still supporting the cat–that’s admirable. I wish them the best of luck with everything!
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Amazing progress! I am so impressed!
I’ve spent at least $3,000 in vet bills on each of two cats….plus they eat more than $1,000 of food each year for 13 years thus far, a little money on toys….I bet lots of cat people spend close to what you did over the lifetime of a cat. Pets help our stress and mental health, and I’m guessing you and your wife could use all the stress relief you can get!
I am really hoping your wife’s health stays as good as possible. Keep up the great work towards being debt-free!!
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Congratulations on your success! I would caution your wife to be careful about working so many hours. I’m sure that rest is an important factor in the management of her MS. An ounce of prevention is worth a pound of cure.
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That is amazing progress! Congratulations on turning your life around!
I also agree not to let your wife overwork herself. Like #17 says (and I’m sure the doctor has said), rest important for MS management.
It’s great that you’re saving more and learning to live with less (defining “enough”) and you’re out of that pretty terrible situation withe business friends. Many people never realize that if they spend on stuff that doesn’t really matter they may not be able to spend on what is actually important (in your case, family and health).
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How old was the cat?
This is really cold to say, but I measure the amount of life left in a cat against the price of treatment. I love my 20 year old cat, but she’s already lived well beyond her expected lifespan and if she got a dire diagnosis I would do what I could to make her comfortable, but there is no way I would spend $30k on her no matter how much I love her.
I think $30k is excessive when you have other obligations. I don’t think of it as an absolute number, but in opportunity cost. I mean, it is worth your wife? How much damage could she have done to her health by working 70-80 hour weeks for so long to pay off the vet bills for your cat? I know the treatments add up, but in the end a cat isn’t human. I don’t mean they necessarily have less value (some would argue so, but that’s not my point), but as I said they have different lifespans. A $30k treatment for your kid could buy him 70 years. A $30k treatment for the same age cat buys you 5. You expect to outlive your pets, you don’t expect to outlive your kids. It’s sad, but no matter how much emotion you put into it that will always be the case and you know it going in. Many people may THINK of their pets as their kids, but they can’t and won’t ever be.
I’m reminded of ‘The Truth About Cats and Dogs’: We can love our pets, we just can’t LOVE our pets.
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I would never spend $30k on a pet but the fact is that you have improved your financial situation from very bad to reasonably good in spite of the pet costs so I don’t think it’s a big deal.
If the $30k kept you in a deep hole then I think it would be a bad decision but that is not the case here.
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(1) For those wondering about the cat, he passed away quietly at home one evening last September. (Probably makes our decision seem even crazier!) Looking back on the decision to treat his illness (treating the lymphoma also required treatment of anemia and eventually diabetes and diabetic seizures after over a year of high steroid dosages) we have both decided we would do it again, but the decision would be the animal’s. We have both had animals who have given up and we let them ultimately make the decision. In this case the cat fought hard for a year and a half and came back from the edge a few times. My wife and I learned more in the year and a half the cat was sick about enjoying and truly living everyday of your life from watching him than we had from any other event in our lives.
The insurance decision has since been made for our other two cats based on this experience. When we first adopted him we didn’t know much about pet insurance and once we had the diagnosis it was too late. (Just like people insurance!)
I know it probably sounds like a stupid decision to some people and I understand. Until you’ve walked a mile in someone else’s shoes it is hard to judge and my wife and I are completely aware most people will disagree with our decision. Many of our family, friends, and coworkers thought we were off of our rocker.
@Real Me At 42
If you like, I’ll contact you through your website to discuss our experiences with dealing with feline lymphoma off-line.
@Shara
The cat was four when he developed swollen lymph nodes under his chin. He seemed totally healthy otherwise and it took about 6 months to determine what was actually wrong with him. At that point we were already close to 10k invested and the prognosis was good so we decided to see what happened.
We were very fortunate to have an excellent veterinary oncology clinic within a 15 minute driving distance and they were able to consult with experts in the field to help with diagnosis. The cat lived until about two months after his 6th birthday. We obviously would have been remiss to spend this much time and money to add a year and a half for a 20 year old cat or if we had other obligations, like children. At the end of the day, the decision to treat him only impacted us.
My wife and I talked about how much she was working every day and as long as the cat kept fighting she wanted to keep treating him. We talked about putting him down several times when he was doing badly and then he would bounce back.
Hopefully everyone will be happy to know she is down to 50 hours a week right now.
(2) My wife’s illness has definitely been a learning process for both of us. Truth be told, I think the cat’s cancer has helped us to deal with her diagnosis better than we would have otherwise. (It certainly kept us distracted…) She is currently taking 3 injections of Rebif (interferon) a week, but it is hard to guess how much it really helps. Her father, two of her father’s sisters, several of his cousins, and a niece have all been diagnosed with MS so we have a fair bit of experience with the disease.
She has been speaking with the MS Society to try to enroll her family in some studies since so many of them have been diagnosed. The prognosis is good and if the progression of her disease is anything like the other family members she should have almost a normal lifespan. For most people living with MS the real issue isn’t lifespan but quality of life.
(3) My wife and I both work for a large telecommunications company. I am a Network Engineer and she is a Translations Technician. She works (a lot) of overtime to help us in paying down our debts. I am salaried and part of an on-call rotation. I work 50-60 hour weeks on average so it would be very difficult for me to work a second job. I wouldn’t call selling things on eBay a second job, but it’s pretty much all I was able to squeeze in to help out other than some freelance work with network support and web development I have done on the side for some people. I am working on several professional certifications now that I hope will translate into an increase in salary. I am also still selling our stuff in an effort to eliminate the clutter and make some more money. The articles about simplifying your life by getting rid of all of your stuff that JD posts are some of my favorite. My wife and I decided when we tried to start turning things around that we didn’t want to be owned by what we owned.
(4) We still have $10,000 on one credit card at %12.24 APR. Prior to the passing of the CARD Act the APR was about 7%. When the rate was increased we finally switched to rewards cards with better rates. The car was paid off this week. We’re hoping to get a 6 month emergency fund (although we have talked about eventually aiming for one year so a 5 year CD ladder could eventually cover us for 6 years, but that’s a long way off…) saved by the middle of next year. We’ll see how that turns out.
Thanks again for your response. My wife and I will be following the comments.
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congratulations you guys! I wish you well.
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“You spent $10,000 on your wife? She’s just a human! You can always remarry! Go on Craigslist, find another!”
Damn, but some of you people are cold. If someone’s child contracted cancer at, say, 8 years, would you just shrug and suggest they “try and get pregnant again”?
Get pet insurance while your pets are healthy. Become an ASPCA member, and their insurance isn’t expensive at all.
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Great story–however I still disagree with the debt snowball theory. If you attack your debts with the highest interest rate first, you will get out of debt quicker.
But congrats on making it out!
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I don’t have anything negative to say about the cat’s treatment costs or other things. I fell into debt through lack of education and having no impulse control but like you I got tired of it and worked my way out. I think it is admirable that you are willing to share your story and put yourself out there.
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Thanks for sharing! Great story
I can completely sympathize about your kitty’s vet bills. A few years ago, before we had kids, we ended up spending over $10,000 on our beloved Maltese. It was as other people said — not all at once, but in little bits and pieces. She seemed lethargic, but no tests turned up anything wrong. (And we did a LOT of them!) Then she started having seizures. Then when she had seizures, they didn’t stop … so she had to be taken to the local veterinary school’s hospital, and each time she stayed a couple of days. She was on medication and got better for awhile, then worse …
When we finally found out what was wrong with her — a rare neurological disease that’s disproportionately found in Maltese — we had already invested thousands and thought that maybe since we had finally figured things out, she would start improving soon. She was so sweet-tempered, so loving, and so precious to us … we felt like we never wanted to say that we didn’t do everything we could for her.
She had many ups and downs, but right around the time our oldest son was born, she got drastically worse. Her quality of life seemed abysmal, and we finally realized we’d reached the point where we were being selfish.
I would have spent twice what we did, if it would’ve made her better. She was my “first baby.” I still miss her every day, and it breaks my heart that my kids won’t grow up with her.
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I find it telling that you seem to treat your wife’s and your cat’s disease on the same level.
Not just a little nuts. I mean, it would be questionable to spend 30,000 $ on a cat if you didn’t have any debt, but with 10,000 $ of credit card debt…
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I think that you hit the nail on the head William by saying that your cat experience helps you work through your wife’s experience. Having to work through one major illness is good practice. Your wife is on a long journey. I will keep you both in my prayers- if you don’t mind.
I appreciated your story.
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This is definitely an interesting situation… both the original post and the responses.
I do not find it odd the writer spent $30K on a pet, that’s his choice and his money.
What I do find startling at first is the that with a wife with MS, he spent three times as much on his pet’s medical condition than on his wife’s:
>>”I’d guess we paid $10,000 in her medical expenses and probably close to $30,000 for the cat over the course of the 2009.”
Perhaps the pet is significant to his wife, so then it goes under HER well-being and quality of HER life. In such as case, then any amount to alleviate the suffering of his wife and promote her happines is worth it.
I do agree with others that applaud the writer’s determination to face his financial situation head-on and pay down his debt to get back to a positive financial condition.
So the message to William is, you are doing the right thing, don’t let anyone else’s opinion stop you from doing the right thing. Even mine.
And another thing… about some comments… I for one would not wish I had got to Vet school.
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I am sure you’re right, we found ourselves in JD’s boat and it was hard to keep on task without feeling progress by eliminating debt one line of credit at a time. I won’t say the debt snowball is the best method but it’s certainly was the easiest method for us psychologically.
@SG
I am amazed you were able to infer in some way from this article that I treat my wife’s illness and the cat’s illness in the same way. Sure, we may have spent more money on the cat, but the cat did not have the exemplary health insurance my wife does.
To your second point, we actually had about 30k of consumer credit card debt when the cat got sick. We have 10k remaining right now that we are working to pay off while we save our emergency fund.
@Jan
Thanks for the kind words! We appreciate your prayers.
@Joe
See the response to SG on what we paid for my wife vs. the cat. We would have easily paid over 100k in just the first year without our insurance.
The cat seems to be the sticking point for most people. Suffice it to say, he was very special to both of us. My wife chose to put in the hours she did so we could progress. I protested many times but at the end of the day, she is a grown woman and it was her choice.
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Is $30K a misprint? I spent $3K on a cat who was hit by a car and needed multiple procedures done over the next couple of months. I can’t imagine going higher than that and would probably just have provided “comfort care” until the end of the cat’s life. I lost 2 cats within 2 years awhile back and spent more on the first, but realized that you can’t fight death forever. With the second I said straight up that if it couldn’t be “cured” I only wanted to keep him comfortable. The vet respected that.
If you have learned nothing else please let this be a lesson that animals are not something you should ever let yourself get buried in debt over. All creatures die, it’s natural. All you can do is love them while they are here.
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It sounds like you two have been through a lot, but kudos on the accomplishments. And you know that you can handle quite a bit, which is a major psychological advantage for you both in the future. Congrats again.
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Awesome job paying down more than $50,000 in debt while you had those expensive health issues. Well done. You’ll have the rest of that debt gone in no time and be on your way to meeting your other goals. Thanks for sharing your story.
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Good for you for seeing what needed to be done, and doing it.
I think for a lot of people it’s easy to think you’ll pay off your debt when things get “back to normal” but you were able to weather some big obstacles and continue with your goals in spite of setbacks.
Regardless of whether people agree that your spending was justified (like it’s any of their concern anyway) I think we can all agree that you are a great example of how to adjust and continue to pursue a goal in the face of the unexpected.
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The most interesting and informative part of this story isn’t the rather eccentric lavishing of money on the cat. It’s the admission near the start of a business failure, and the difficulty it causes.
The Internet – particularly the blogging community – is in denial about how hard it is to start a real business, and to make money from it, and all the complications that involving other people, let alone friends, into it can bring.
I wrote a post called ’7 reasons why you shouldn’t start a business’ that I have had more disproportionate negative comments and emails over then anything else on the blog.
Yet if anyone who has actually been in business reads it (unless they had one fluke success) they recognize the truth in it.
A little reality check offered by a blog will be the least of the challenges!
So thanks for sharing, and all the best for your physical and financial futures.
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William,
Thanks for putting your story out there! It took guts to open yourself up like that and I totally admire it. It is really motivating to see someone come out of debt (for the most part) and not lose sight of quality of life in the meantime….
Well done!
I wish you and your wife continued success and good health!
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While I haven’t had to spend $30k on a pet, I do understand. We spent over $2k to give an old, beloved dog another GOOD six months of life.
We have no kids, and it was our choice and our money. Everyone who’s grousing at you for spending that money on “just a cat” should sit down, shut up and realize that not everyone has the same priorities.
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While I am trying to comprehend the idea of spending 30K on extending the life of a cat for a year (and I am having a lot of difficulty with that I must admit), I think there is a larger issue here that needs to be addressed more often.
Several years ago one of my friends got married in a fairly lavish ceremony. She spent about 30K on the wedding, using up all of the inheritance she had received unexpectedly. I was surprised that she decided to spend it all on a wedding but she was adamant that having that wedding was worth it. I will even say I am sure she meant every word at the time.
Fast forward several years and I can say that she is now quite vocal about regretting having spent that money. She is still happily married, has a beautiful child and wishes more than anything that she hadn’t thrown all that money away on a single day. Times are tough and that money would really come in handy.
I think it is easy to decide that spending a large amount of money makes sense when you aren’t looking at the big picture…but I do wonder if it will still seem like a great idea to have spent that money if you hit unexpected financial stresses in the upcoming years.
Those are the questions I think we should be asking more often. Would that 30K have been better spent on starting your retirement funds…because the compounding over 30 years would make that 30K more like over 200K most likely. Was the cat worth 200K in retirement?, perhaps yes. But I don’t think enough of us really ask that question when it comes to our financial health.
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1. The cat got sick first. We were well underway dealing with his illness when I got my diagnosis. I always thought I was paranoid about suspecting that I might develop MS but honestly I was probably just trying to talk myself out of what was obvious.
2. We have a nice home office setup (remnants from the home-business days) and I was able to log into systems remotely to work almost all of the overtime at home. For me, sitting at home mired in the debt and doing nothing while watching my cat die would have killed me. Being able to work the OT and actually treat the cat (he had a slim but real chance at being virtually cured) helped me deal with the reality of MS in a remarkable way. When my first big attack came it paralyzed my right arm and hand – a few months later when I could type competently I started the overtime with a vengeance. And it helped that during most of the time I worked at home, our cats laid on the desk beside me between our keyboards.
3. I probably have never had another pet that would be willing to go through treatment the way he did. He understood what was up and when he was finished with it he let us know. Until then every night he popped up on the couch and sat in my lap while we gave him fluids and medications through the line. A cat did this. I don’t think *I* would do this but he was willing and knew it made him better. He was pretty comfortable and content up until the last couple of weeks, and I wouldn’t take any of it back. It does come in drips and drops. Without a veterinary oncologist nearby we probably would’ve just been told he was going to die in 2 to 6 weeks.
4. One thing I would take back is ever starting a business with friends. I’m not saying that this is a bad idea for everyone, but it is a bad idea for almost everyone.
5. We actually have the best insurance plan our company offers. Will didn’t mention it but he has serious asthma problems and there is a pretty large gulf between our company’s two offerings. That said, medication is expensive, deductibles for MRIs are expensive, repeated doctor visit co-pays add up, etc. Just like with the cat there are miscellaneous expenses that trickle in over time. With the cat it was a prescription here and an ultrasound there. With me it was much the same. Insurance gives you a lot of peace of mind about how much you will pay if/when illness finds you, but it doesn’t account for all of the costs that come with it.
6. Will works some insane hours sometimes. If he had been able to get a second job he would have, but every network maintenance happens overnight. It wasn’t a possibility for him, and for me working overtime meant a much higher pay rate than getting a second job.
Even though we’ve made a lot of progress it feels like watching grass grow. That’s not what the Mint graphs look like, but that’s how it feels. For anyone in a similar situation, choose a method and do whatever you can. Personally, I prefer paying down whatever has the highest interest rate to the snowball method. Different methods work for different people. Regardless, sometimes your cat is in the hospital for a week and they drop a $3500 bill on you and sometimes you manage to pay $5000 in one week to a loan. And sometimes it’s in “drips and drops” as one commenter said. Overtime the progress happens even if it feels like you’re running to stand still.
Thanks again for all the comments. Take care all!
~Sara
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It warms my heart to read you did everything you could for your cat, despite other pressing bills. Good for you!
And to those who say “I should have been a veterinarian”, vets and their techs do NOT make a lot of money. And they work hard, and long hours.
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Engaging post, William, thanks for sharing. You referenced your financial pictures as a “comedy of errors” – what poetic and insightful language.
We had to euthanize my darling cat Honey in May of 2007. His sickness came at the later end of his life; I had him eighteen years by then. I thought I was going to lose him another time, and I felt like such worthless crap after leaving an insensitive vet who basically had a “show me the money” mentality. I was a poor college student. Anyway, my mother prayed fervently for him – and he survived another two years. Honey was always greedy so when he stopped eating. I sincerely believed that was his way of telling me he was tired. I can empathize with your decision. Sometimes as morbid as it may sound a “deathbed analysis” is in order – who lies on their deathbed dreaming about money, investment returns? Money is a tool and you used it to accomplish what you needed in your family’s life in that moment. My vet told me she was not sure Honey would even be responsive to treatment and that he was suffering – which curtailed our choices greatly.
As for the overtime your wife worked, with the recent MS diagnosis, you never know how long she can work. So it’s great that she was able to contribute mightily to your debt repayment efforts.
The Reader Stories are a fantastic feature, and I sincerely hoped people do not grow overly hesitant to share and be candid because a few commenters are judgmental and crass.
Not everyone will make the same mistakes but important universal lessons can be gleaned from just about any experience.
Best wishes of longevity, peace, and health to both you and your wife.
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Yes… I know this is callus.. but $30k on a cat? Put the cat down and save a child or family in your local neighbourhood or in Africa..
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Great dialogue! The Reader Stories’ posts have so much more impact when the original story is engaged in the conversation. Sashie (Poster #38) – loved the points you raised, I think it is easy to get carried away and make financial decisions in a silo instead of a part of an integrated fiscal strategy. Enjoyed Sara’s comments as well, everyone just assumed that OT involved being at the office at all hours of the night. Assumptions are often not grounded in reality. I think what this posts demonstrates is the human beings are very resilient, and can structure their lives were peace and fiscal security abound even in the midst of a catastrophe or a setback.
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Dear William and Sara,
I’m a pet lover, too. I had one cat pass away from lymphoma; another from sheer old age, at 21; and another is about 15 or so with some chronic medical problems. I’m so sorry to hear of the tough time your cat had with the lymphoma; it sounds as though you both were very thoughtful about what he needed, and I can tell how much you loved him, and how well you communicated with him. I totally get your choices!
Thank you both for sharing so candidly your journey to date; I like how you have framed both the things you wish you’d done differently (starting a business with friends) and the choices that remained important (your cat’s care), and how you’ve really worked on the debt and money issues. Congratulations!
And best wishes to Sara, indeed to your whole family!
Mimi
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Some have cats because they can not have children…
Some have children because they can’t have cats!!!
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I feel really personally torn reading this. I have a cat who is approaching 13 years old and I know I will most likely start facing some tough decisions in the next 5 years. In my mind, I have actually put a tentative cap on how much I would be willing to spend: somewhere between $2,000 and $5,000, that’s it.
And every time I think about it when hearing stories like this, I wonder whether I am practical and looking at the big picture – or just heartless. Because I have no consumer debt, a paid off mortgage, and no other direct dependents – so I could afford to pay more – but I am deciding in advance not to and just get a new cat when that time comes… But then, over my teenage years we lost several pets one after another in a series of accidents so I sometimes wonder if I learned early on to disassociate from a pet as the only way to deal.
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I am totally amazed and inspired that you were able to focus on getting your debt down so quickly and working with such intention AT THE SAME TIME as dealing with two major emotional blows. The health diagnosis of illness for two family members is enough to send a lot of people into a downward spiral of depression as is debt. And to hear that you used both situations as a motivating force is quite amazing. I really applaud the mental re-framing that must take.
It’s encouraging to me as I deal with my own poor financial situation without any of these other issues! If you can do it while also dealing with some other major issues, I don’t have an excuse! Thanks for your story.
**For what it is worth, I am of the opinion that taking on the responsibility for the care of a life (be it spouse, child, pet or plant) means that you are willing to do what it takes to keep that living being as happy and healthy as possible as long as it is humane to do so. It is a good idea to examine the costs (both emotional and financial) of these responsibilities before you take them on. To those that are critical – whatever your personal beliefs regarding the worth of animals in your life, please consider what you are willing to spend before bringing them into your life. Again, I applaud this couple for their open hearts.
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My husband shakes his head when I take my hamsters to the vet, which I occasionally have to do, but they are like my little buddies. I can’t just sit back and watch them die when they can be helped. (although I have to admit, I’ve never had more than a $10 vet bill for a hamster!)
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My mother wouldn’t spend $1,000 on a cat. I think she viewed them like a VCR, if it’s cheaper to get a new one than repair the old one…
Somewhere between there and $30k is what is reasonable.
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I had a cat who became diabetic in the last several years of her life. I probably spent $2-3,000 between (regular) vet visits, medications, special food (which the dog loved!) and an emergency vet visit. The day I had to have her put down was one of the hardest days of my life, but at that point, it was a matter of when, not if.
We then spent ~$2000 additional for renovating our powder room where the litter box had been located.
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