This guest post from Mike C. is part of the “reader stories” feature at Get Rich Slowly. Some stories contain general advice; others are examples of how a GRS reader achieved financial success — or failure. These stories feature folks from all levels of financial maturity and with all sorts of incomes.
On June 26th, I married my best friend. Together, we entered married life debt-free and with six months of expenses in the bank. We paid for the ceremony, reception, and honeymoon in cash. This may not seem remarkable, but just two years ago I was sitting on about $14,000 in high-interest credit card debt with no real sign of ever digging out.
In fact, I didn’t even really care that much. I had the gizmos, gadgets, and toys I wanted. My monthly bills always left me with enough left over to feel like I wasn’t completely in the red (even though I was — deeply). Everything looked rosy from where I was sitting. Even as the economy crumbled around me, I remained blissfully ignorant of the precarious situation I was in.
The Turning Point
By the late summer of 2008, I realized that I had found “The One” and wanted to spend the rest of my life with this very special woman. Now, this may sound cliché but this was honestly one of those “The heavens opened up and I saw with perfect clarity” moments. Here I was, living in a cheap apartment, with a mountain of debt, no real savings, and no plan for the future. I was spending money hand-over-fist on ridiculous Stuff that wasn’t making me happy, and wasn’t improving my quality of life at all. This was not a good situation to be in if I wanted to bring another person into my life.
I knew that money is one of the main issues couples fight about, and I was determined that debt, specifically, would not be an issue for us. I decided it was time to change. I made a promise to myself: I wouldn’t propose until I had eliminated my last bit of debt.
The Blitz to Solvency
You’ve read all of the tricks here at GRS about how to cut expenses and eliminate debt. Everything from canceling subscription services to cutting luxury purchases, from eating out less and finding creative ways to cutting minor expenses here and there. I did it all.
In fact, for several months I went a bit over-board and didn’t buy anything that wasn’t 100% essential to my daily survival. My monthly expenses dropped to virtually nothing (under $1,000/month, including rent). If I had to guess, I’d say that I was socking away roughly 60% of my take-home pay. I was a savings machine.
At this point, I also consolidated all of my credit-card debt onto one card with a better interest rate than the rest (from a usurious rate of near 30% on one card to a much more reasonable 9.9%) to reduce the complexity of the payments and make it feel like I was doing more with each payment. (Never underestimate the psychological benefit of making one $200 payment as opposed to two $100 payments.)
Initially, my debt vanished at a fantastic rate as I employed all the tricks I could. But eventually it leveled off, and it felt like, while I was making steady progress, it would still take a long time to get to where I wanted to be.
Fear Sets In
Late 2008 and early 2009 were just flat-out terrible for the US economy. Jobless rates were skyrocketing, consumer spending was near an all-time low, the housing market was imploding, and banks were closing their doors. For someone trying to rebuild their finances, this was terrifying, and I worried about what would happen if I lost my job. Sure my debt was dwindling, but my savings was going nowhere; if I lost my job, I’d be in a world of trouble.
Of course, the emergency fund vs. debt reduction debate is hotly contested:
- On one side, you have the argument that it’s mathematically better to kill off the high-interest debt before putting money into a savings account that earns less interest.
- On the other side, there’s the issue of psychological comfort and the safety net being in place if things really go wrong.
I decided to split the difference. I adjusted my payments so that two-thirds of my left-over income went to debt, and one-third went into savings. I opened an ING Direct account for the emergency fund so I’d earn some money on it, and it’d be out of easy reach in case I was tempted by some new toy.
In addition to wanting to be debt-free, my goal had now expanded to include a six-month emergency fund.
Sheesh! At this rate I’d never get married!
Impatience Sets In
My debt-repayment plan progressed steadily, if a bit slower than originally planned, and I was working to save enough money to survive for six months should I lose my job. Assuming no unexpected expenses came up (ha!), my spreadsheet said I’d hit both goals by mid-2011.
2011?! That was two years away! In two years, a lot of things can change. The company I work for could be out of business. I might have to move cross-country for work. My car could blow up. And so on.
Not to mention, I’d be near 30 and have very little to show for my life so far. Waiting two years before I could start my life — and start building assets — with my intended was just too long. So, I made a decision that was probably foolhardy long-term, but which has definitely helped immensely in the short-term: I cashed out a Roth IRA.
From a previous job, I had about $8,000 sitting in a Roth IRA that had lost all of its gains and essentially just contained the money I originally put into it. Pulling that money out and using it to pay down the debt would eliminate what was left of my debt and let me focus 100% on the savings plan. Instead of another two years to meet my goals, if I tightened my belt even more, I could reach them by Summer 2009.
I know that I forfeited a few decades of compounding interest, and at the end of everything probably gave up near $100,000 in retirement savings, but I felt that getting myself on solid financial ground today would pay me greater returns in life overall. I know many will criticize this decision I, but it was the right one for me, and I feel much better having made it.
FREE!
Every few weeks I’d update my spreadsheet and watch as the numbers inched closer and closer towards my goal. I was going to make it. By the end of May 2009, I was going to be debt free and have enough money in the bank to survive for six months if the worst happened. I was finally in a place where I felt I could propose and bring nothing but good things to the marriage. So over Memorial Day weekend 2009, I proposed to my girlfriend Elisa, and she said yes! Now it was time to celebrate by planning the wedding.
Staying Smart in Wedding Planning
Both Elisa and I have pretty simple tastes when it comes to celebrations. We’re also not into weddings that have hundreds of guests. So, we set the goal from the start to have a small wedding, and to retain full control, paying for it ourselves. All-told, the wedding and reception cost us $5000 for a 50-person event. We saved on costs by doing some of the following:
- Ceremony in a local park ($100)
- Non-traditional wedding dress ($200)
- No flowers (huge savings here)
- Reception at a restaurant (wine, tapas, and dessert) ($2,000)
- Simple wedding rings ($1000)
The rest of the $5000 was made up of miscellaneous expenses like tux rental, favors, hair, makeup, and two nights at a local B&B after the wedding. Every step of the way, we paid in full. I carried no debt for the wedding longer than the few days it took for my bank to send the funds to pay off the credit card. The same was true for our honeymoon to Rome. We paid off the flights and hotel costs before we left, and we put away a bit of cash every paycheck to cover all of our in-country expenses for the trip.
Setting a Solid Foundation for our Future
Here we are, just married and we have solid savings, no debt, and have settled down to a plan where about 40% of our take-home pay goes into savings towards future goals (house, retirement, vacations etc). We’re also working towards building that six months savings into a full year of salary, so that we have true freedom from our paycheck, and can live and explore life the way we want to and not be tied to any particular job. Right now, it looks like we’ll hit that goal within the next year!
The feeling of security and contentment I had when I paid down the last of my debt, then again when I had six months of expenses saved, and finally when I paid for the entire wedding without incurring debt was beyond words. Accomplishment coupled with a huge burden being lifted from my shoulders is probably the best way to describe it. And best of all, we’re on solid ground going forward.
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Thank you for sharing.
Here’s our frugal wedding list:
His & Hers head-to-toe outfits (Ross) – $200
Las Vegas Chapel (Little Chapel of the West) – $200
Flowers – $20
DVD & Photos of Ceremony $150
Her ring (White Gold & Sapphire) – $150
His ring (Tungsten Carbide) – $30
Wedding cake (cupcakes from our favorite restaurant) – $10
Reception (Sunset at Floyd Llamb State Park) – $5
Total: $765 and it was a beautiful day we’ll never forget!
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Wow! That is definitely quite the story. My wife and I have a similar story, but we weren’t smart enough to get rid of our debts before we got married. However, it was helpful that we both wanted to focus on eliminating it once we were together.
We have paid off $9,000 this year (and paid cash for a $6,500 Jeep), and have $8,800 to go, but it feels good to know we’ll be rid of this debt by mid 2011!
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When I changed jobs 10 years ago (early 30′s) I also took some money out of my 401k to get debt free and replace my car. Yes I paid a penalty and yes I lost future earnings. And I’ve never regretted it. That jump start allowed me now (early 40′s) to own a beautiful home and have no debt aside the mortgage, which we are paying ahead now, thanks to the no other debt part. Sometimes you have to live for the now. Good story, thanks for sharing.
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Please post a follow-up. In fact, a yearly follow-up would be great. There are so many stories out there about couples that start out with debt. Your progress would provide a different perspective. I would bet your Roth IRA is back on track in a few years.
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Congrats!
That sounds like our wedding (which we will be posting about on Monday, by coincidence… maybe all those December proposals…)
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Congrats, although I feel you overpaid for wedding rings if you went with “simple.” My wife’s and my wedding bands cost a combined $150. I’m a bit jealous of Commenter #1 (Daniel) who bought his Tungsten ring for $30, mine cost $90.
We got married last summer with about 20 people attending and cost about $500 total.
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If I wait to propose until I’m debt free, it’s going to be a really LONG time, seeing how I’ll be coming out of dental school with $400,000 in debt.
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This is a great post! As young folks you have given yourselves an amazing wedding gift of zero debt and a commitment to staying that way. That is worth all the jewels in the world. Perhaps more importantly you have proven to yourself that you can do it. You are far ahead of the typical American, let alone the typical young married American. I say Kudos to you and your bride and keep up the outstanding job of remaining debt free!!!
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Sometimes the choice that is best on paper isn’t what works in real life. For many people, the psychological boost of having no debt trumps potential future earnings. Congrats on entering marriage debt free.
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Another lead for this article might be “I paid for my wedding with retirement savings, and now I’m savings-free” (beyond the emergency fund). It sounds like you’re confident in the decision (and married!). It’s just not quite as rosy as the intro reads.
What did your your wife think of your debt/spending when you met? How about of the IRA liquidation (vs bringing in debt and IRA)?
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Awesome story. I’m impressed by your work. I might not have made the same Roth IRA decision, but I like everything else you did. When I’m making more than $1k a month, I always save 35-60% of my income. It’s just sensible.
Recently, my boyfriend has been paying his student loans at a highly accelerated rate. I wonder if his thinking is the same? We’ve talked about marriage and the need to be debt free, and student loan debt is the only debt either of us carry (mine from my current master’s degree, and I have the money in the bank to pay it off but wouldn’t turn down a subsidized loan, and his from undergrad).
What I like best about this story is that Mike didn’t want to bring his wife into the debt repayment portion. I think many would be tempted to bring the debt into marriage, thinking “we’ll pay it off together,” but that’s risky and not fair to the debt-free partner.
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Great job. We did the same many yrs ago, paying cash for the weddding. Basically debt free going into the marriage and then a moment (or 10) of insanity and now we have nearly $1,000,000 in debt, but digging out with a big shovel. Stay on course!
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More details, please – within a range, how much is your annual income? Also, was the $8,000 paid off with the IRA part of the original $14,000? Thanks. I love the debt-freedom stories and, again, this one is about a young person who decided it was time to grow-up.
Also, what financial plans have you made as a family? Mingled or separate finances? If one spouse provides health insurance (through an employer), how does the other spouse match that?
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Congratulation!!!!
You guys sounds like a great couple with good financial foundation (these last few years at least.)
I think it is the 100% correct decision to cash out your Roth IRA and get married earlier. Now you will be building your saving at twice your previous rate!!! I’m assuming your wife works.
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Congrats, Mike on a job well done! Your passion and focus is evident. It was fun to read the post and feel you gain momentum. While it’s exhilarating to find “The One” – once you come down off of that cloud so many couples fail to plan or even envision what type of future they want for themselves. Lifestyles require money. Gaining assets requires money. We have temporarily stopped contributing to retirement while we retire our consumer debt. I am convinced that when you have too many irons in the fire, none of them gets sufficiently hot.
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Some people might disagree with your choice and it may not have been the right choice for everyone or the “right” choice on paper, but to me it sounds like cashing out the ROTH IRA was the right choice for you. Here’s why:
1) Your wife was the catalys to get your financial life (and probably other areas of your life too) on track. Getting married to her sooner rather than later will likely put you on the right track.
2) YOU are at peace with the decision, bully to whatever someone else has to say.
3) You now have the financial discipline to re-contribute many times over. THAT is what really matters.
Good for you and congratulations on what sounds like the start to a beautiful marriage!
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This is an amazing story. My husband and I are saving for a house now, and this is definitely inspiring.
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Way to go, and all of the best to you & your future wife! I am trying to do something similar so that I do not burden my future spouse and family with my student loan debt. I am making aggressive monthly payments so I can pay it all off. One of my loans was consolidated so it has very low interest, so some people might suggest doing other things with my money (like investing) rather than paying that off completely, but for me it makes sense because then I will be FREE and I cannot wait. What makes sense on paper doesn’t always make sense for an individual and their life.
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Yeah, I’m really curious what your girlfriend/wife thought of all this- how long had you two been together? Was she aware that your proposal was contingent on financial goals? Would she have wanted you to cash out the Roth IRA if you had discussed it? (sounds strange to discuss it with a girlfriend, but not with a wife.)
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Thank God you were paying attention when the heavens opened up and you got your message of clarity. Imagine where you would be now if you kept on your prior path?
I personally don’t have a problem with using the Roth IRA to take care of debt. If you are swimming in debt now and it is affecting your qualify of life psychologically, then why not use the Roth money? It isn’t like you aren’t going to build up your retirement savings again, assuming you stay in your savings patterns.
I talk to more people that make high interest payments on their credit cards but are maxing out on 401ks and Roth IRAs. I don’t get it myself. However, debt freedom gives me peace of mind, and maybe retirement savings gives them peace of mind.
I really enjoyed your post.
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I have always thought have a healthy balance in my retirement savings showed I had something. Are you sure you don’t regret it just a little given all the market gains in the past two years?
I do not think there is a ever a situation where it is beneficial to take money out of a Roth or 401 despite the fact that you had lost all your gains. The tax rate on top of the 10% penalty is substantial. I know you think this was the best decision for you, but it doesn’t make any sense why you would give so much away to the govt that was technically in savings to “start saving.” You should have held back on that decision atleast a year to see where you were at and viewed that retirement account as an emergency fund for one of the unplanned expenses you were anticipating. Having done so your account would have substantially increased between 2009 and 2010 to where you could have taken only a portion out to settle all your debts.
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LOVED this story, although my newlywed husband and I have you beat so far as inexpensive wedding. Ours was $40.00! and we couldn’t be happier! You sure have us beat on the no-debt end, although we are working incredibly hard to beat it.
Gerry (my husband) just wrote 2 great articles on our blog about the national debt and what we can do about it. Turns out we have a LOT of influence that way if we only knew it. Feel free to come over and read them, National Debt part 1 and National Debt part 2 (original, I’m not)
The more we understand about spending and debt, the more in control of our lives we’ll be, and the better our future will be, too.
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Great story. Just be sure to start refilling that Roth ASAP
Re AC: One of the nice things with a Roth is that you can withdraw *your contributions* penalty-free. So if you put in $3000, you can take out $3000 later without any penalty. If that $3000 grew to $4000, THEN the additional $1000 would be subject to tax+penalty if you withdrew that portion after already withdrawing the original $3000.
However, that said, there is an opportunity loss inherent in taking money out of the account, if for example stocks/bonds go up significantly in the time that the money is out. And once the money is out, it will count against the $5k yearly limit when it’s put back in. But in this case it sounds like he was careful to weigh the loss of that opportunity with his situation.
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Clarification for AC #21: You can always take out whatever you’ve contributed to a ROTH without tax or penalty. You’ve already paid tax on the money going in. It’s only if you take out earning that you owe taxes and penalties. In this case, there were no earnings.
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Mike, I commend you for your dedication to eliminating your debt. A lot of people dont realize (or want to realize) the implications of carrying debt. You saw a problem and took action. Although Im not a huge fan of liquidating retirement monies, I certainly see how it was a good move for you two in your situation. I wish you and your wife a happy future together. Eliminating your debt will allow you two to enjoy life with one less burden.
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Thank you for sharing!! This story was one of the most delightful since reader stories have been posted!
I wish you the best and hope you’ll update again!!
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@ #20, most likely it’s because retirement savings are untouchable by bankruptcy plus the power of compounding interest.
Say you had a scenario where you had $10,000 in debt and paid 10% in interest and had $10,000 in retirement savings where you earned 8% in returns. Say you had extra income of $2,000 a year where you could use towards paying debt or put towards your retirement. Now you have to spend at least $1,000 of that on the interest for debt alone, but what should you do with the extra $1,000? If you paid down debt, within 10 years you’d be debt free but you wouldn’t have added to your retirement savings principal. However, if you had contributed the extra $1,000 to your retirement savings, left your debt intact, fully paid down interest every year, you’d end up with a net worth of $27K (retirement principal of $20K + retirement returns of $17K – debt of $10K). In the first scenario, you had no debt but your net worth is lower at $22K (retirement principal of $10K + returns of $12K). The first scenario should be a tad higher because you had the tax advantage of retirement contributions.
Of course, qualitatively, most people could argue that people that are already in debt would be increasing their debt, so taking that extra money and buying even more expensive stuff on credit. If that person declared bankruptcy, at least anything they added to retirement at the same time would net them both a tax benefit AND those savings are safe from creditors, while an emergency fund is not.
Anyways that last scenario is a worst case scenario, and its not morally desirable to walk away from debt but still have a positive net worth, but that’s how it is now until laws are changed…
Also, I’m a big fan of this story because its really sweet, but I do have to mention that while paying down debt/increasing savings benefits from lots of psychological strategies (consolidating debt, paying the smallest debt first, etc.), investing benefits from the removal of psychology. Mike says that he took out the Roth because the 2000s were a lost decade where any money you put in was basically the same you took out at the end; however, he’s so young that he could have benefited from future boom years. It sounds like he took out his Roth sometime between March – May 2009 which was the absolute bottom of the market. If he had at least waited till now to even take out the Roth, he would have had a lot more money, since the S&P has recovered over 50% since then. 50% more money!! For just waiting less than a year.
JD, since you’re bored of credit card debt, maybe you can start researching on how to put your retirement money to work? I think asset rebalancing strategies work the best–just dig into the historical returns versus active money managers over the long-term and you’ll see what I mean.
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@AC – My understanding of Roth IRAs is that you can withdraw your contributions (not your earnings) at any time without penalties or taxes. You’ve already paid taxes on those dollars.
To me, this makes the Roth IRA very attractive as an emergency fund. Would I rather set aside money in a savings account for an emergency, or put it in a retirement account? With a Roth IRA, I don’t have to choose one or the other. If I need the funds for an emergency I can take them without penalty – if I end up not needing the funds then they grow tax free. Sure, if I withdraw the funds then I lose future tax-free earnings, but if I choose to put my emergency fund in a non-retirement account in the first place then I guarantee myself zero tax-free earnings.
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Good on you!
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Oops. My bad. Thank you both 22 and 23 for correcting me. I guess if the reader did not pay any tax or penalty then that negates my whole argument.
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Interesting story. Hopefully your lady was a lot more a part of all this than you make it out to be, and you just simplified it for the story.
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@ sarah (31):
Why would she need to be involved? He created a mess and wanted to clean it up before he brought her into his life. I think that’s admirable and the responsible thing for him to do. If he kept her informed of it, that’s fine, but I don’t see how that would be a necessity from either her viewpoint or his that she be ‘involved’. Could you enlighten us as to why you see it otherwise? Just curious…
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Thank you all for the wonderful comments! I see there have been a few questions on some of the specifics in the story…
1. Annual Income
When all of this story was taking place, I was making roughly 40k annually.
2. Was the $8k my Roth contributions, or were there earnings?
It was contributions so I was able to withdraw penalty free
3. Did I discuss this all with Elisa before hand?
Yes. We had already discussed getting married and knew it was going to happen, it was just a matter of when I’d formally pop the question and we’d begin the planning. She knew about my debt from the start, and my plans to pay it off. I discussed the Roth element specifically with her at length before actually pulling the trigger.
She was involved pretty much every step of the way since my finances would be her finances soon enough.
3. Do I regret cashing out the Roth given how much the market has grown since?
Not at all. Taking that money and paying off my debt opened up many opportunities that would not have existed otherwise. I knew the mathematical cost of this action, but my life is vastly better for it.
The big thing is this allows me to now start maxing out a new Roth account every single year. It would have been years before I’d have been able to do that otherwise. In the end, I feel I’ll come out further ahead.
And I do still have retirement savings. I was contributing into a company 401(k) the entire time to get the company match. So I didn’t lose my 20s entirely in this regard.
I knew the Roth element specifically would get some passionate responses. I just want to stress the fact that I did discuss it, did weigh the opportunities now vs the costs later, and for me and Elisa it was the absolute right decision.
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I loved this story and I don’t blame you a bit for taking out your Roth – you’d already changed your mindset and you’ve still got plenty of time to save for retirement.
Our wedding was quite a bit more but our immediate families (including siblings, their spouses and children) was an eyepopping 83 people. We had 25 others in attendance and that was it for a total cost of about 8k. But we also started out about 250k in debt – mostly student loans but some credit cards as well. I’m glad we didn’t wait until we were debt free to marry, but I can certainly understand the desire.
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I don’t criticize the OP for using retirement savings to accelerate his debt payment. I did something similar. I was working such a low paying job that after 5 years, I only had $3000 in my SIMPLE IRA, despite contributing the 3% max to get the company match. I said “this is nuts,” cashed out the IRA, and used the money to start a new life in a bigger city. That money, plus my savings, helped me pay for rent, deposits, and kept my bills paid until I found employment. After a little over 2 years my debt was gone and I had savings. It was a last resort, but I had nothing to lose and I’ve never regretted it.
I am concerned though, about the comments touting Roths as an emergency fund. Sure there’s no penalties/taxes on contributions, but that’s only if you have gains. My sister lost all of her gains and a huge chunk of her contributions last year and was in a bind when she needed that money as a down payment on a new house. If your goal is to save, use a savings account. If you want growth, invest it. Roths, like all retirement accounts, are for investing and it annoys me when I constantly hear that people should “save” more by increasing their contributions to a retirement account!
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Firstly, congratulations – both on your marriage and becoming debt free!
I really enjoyed reading this and found your dedicated approach quite inspirational. I also appreciate the fact that you highlighted that cashing in the ROTH IRA may not be suitable for everyone but was the right choice for you.
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I think that Mike made the right choice in cashing out the Roth IRA. Why? Well , not to be morbid, but as none of us knows how long we are to be on this earth, I say enjoy your life NOW. He was responsible, paid off all debt, discussed everything with his future bride beforehand, and still kept providing for his retirement. I’ve seen firsthand the misery that ridiculous denial, when you have the means, does to a person, and it isn’t good. I’m not speaking of denying yourself the latest toy-that’s a no-brainer. But waiting to spend the rest of your life with someone? Nope, I’d vote for love anyday. Good for you Mike. Best wishes for a long and loving partership with your obviously cherished Elisa.
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I’m hoping that both comments #7 (four hundred thousand in debt for dental school) and #12 (one million dollars in debt) are typos! Holy cow!
Hubby and I took on a nearly four hundred thousand loan for his business expansion, but it wasn’t personal liability, and will be paid off by the end of this winter, three and a half years earlier than scheduled, despite the recession, which slowed things down about eight months. I can’t imagine tackling that kind of personal debt.
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Congratulations on setting and reaching a goal and on your upcoming marriage. I both respect your accomplishments and got a good chuckle out of this thinking back to when I married a divorced man with 2 college-bound kids and not much (post-divorce) in the way of savings, but we’ve survived (and thrived) … different life stages, different scenarios.
@Vanessa #35 on the Roth/savings, I disagree. Once I can have a fully funded EF and a Roth, I’ll separate the two, but for now I just keep the part of the Roth I need to double as an EF in cash equivalents. Beyond the benefit of allowing tax-free growth and a much higher interest rate than I’d get on regular savings (albeit of course generating $$$ I cannot touch, except in a few specific emergencies, without a penalty), there’s nothing like knowing I’d be dipping into retirement savings to help distinguish true emergencies from minor crises …
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(32)
I was hoping his girlfriend was involved in the planning and decision of when to get married, not necessarily the debt repayment. I’ve seen a lot of guys *decide* they’ll get married when (they get a promotion, have $X saved for a ring, fill in the blank) without bothering to ask their potential partner-for-life what she thought of it. Most of the time the guy thinks he’s doing something noble and the girl is super frustrated because he won’t have a straight up conversation with her about marriage.
Lots of guys (I can count my own husband and the husbands of 4 friends here) have this fantasy about “surprising” their girlfriend at just the right time and fail to notice that by the time that marriage is a good idea, she’s probably thought of it too, and won’t be all that “surprised”
The story reads as though she was either just hanging around, waiting to be asked, with all the patience in the world (years’ worth) or totally clueless that marriage was even a possibility. Neither of those seem too likely. Like I said, I *hope* they were talking about it all along.
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I’ve already commented, but I wanted to contribute two additional observations.
(1) I was watching “Til Debt Do Us Part” last night, and Gail cautioned a couple that it does not do you any good if you have an asset that gives you a net return of 5-8% (income property) versus having a liability (consumer debt) that’s costing you 10-30% in interest. I think that argument applies to retirement accounts as well.
(2) With student loans, people normally perceive those as “safe” debt. There is nothing safe about that kind of debt. These loans are generally not dischargeable in bankruptcy except in grave circumstances. If you have Direct Student Loans from the federal government, your Social Security wages can be garnished. See http://www.ssa.gov/deposit/DDFAQ898.htm
Debt puts households in a precarious position. Building an extensive investment portfolio seems like a mistake if you have consumer debt. If you get sick or become disabled or have to address some other unanticipated emergency – what gives me peace of mind is having no debt and the freedom of having the ability to make decisions based on my life’s goals not how many minimum payments I have due.
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Debt free is a better start than most get!
I think cashing the ROTH was OK because of your intent. Some might say they’re going to pay off debt and stay out of debt, but end up using it as an excuse over and over again getting back into debt. For those people, ignore this example!
Your rings weren’t THAT expensive.
I hate the commenters who want to buy a house before they’re married but have $xxx,xxx of debt. You started out better.
Congrats!
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My cousin’s fiancee wouldn’t marry him until he quit smoking..and thankfully he did. It’s amazing what one will do for love.
Great story. I hope you continue to lead this life once a house and kids come into the picture.
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This is an inspirational story that everyone who truly wants to be debt free should read and absorb and follow the same path. Really, it is great to have such a motivating factor like this man wanting to get married to spur him on to make sacrifices in order to pay off his debt. I think he will be on a solid financial ground the rest of his life.
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Sarah – Elisa was aware of all of this every step of the way. As I said in an earlier comment, we had discussed marriage at length before I actually popped the question and she was aware of what I was trying to do, why, and was supportive.
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It sounds like you matured a lot in the process–and your new wife must be on board to agree to a simple wedding (if I were a guy I’d be leary of a woman who insisted on a huge wedding). Great story and thanks for sharing. I know on paper that cashing out the Roth isn’t the “smartest” but finances are sometimes about emotions and feelings of security too.
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Great job.
We had a similar experience but in a slightly different order. We paid for the wedding, ring, honeymoon and travel with cash about 11 grand that we saved during the year of our engagement.
After the wedding we realized how fast we has saved up that money and it made us realize we would never escaped the rat race if we didn’t get out of debt.
We used a modified Dave Ramsey TMMO plan and paid off all our non-mortgage debt (about 50K) and funded a three month emergency fund in just over a year.
Congratulation on being debt free and the marriage.
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Congrats on your marriage! Long time lurker/reader here. Got married the same day as you, June 26th, 2010. I’m happy to hear someone else in my age group being responsible with their finances. For our wedding, we lucked out in being able to use the university’s reception area (wife is doing her master’s there) for free, along with its heavily discounted liquor and food rates (who knew the student activity fee had so many benefits?). We ended up paying for everything in cash. Not a bad feeling.
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I did a similar thing – cash out retirement funds to pay off old debt. I wouldn’t recommend it for everyone, but for me it worked out great. I had just divorced and wanted to “clean the slate”. To me, any remaining debt was proof of my failure in that span of my life. I used the proceeds from our home sale to pay off most of my debt, then the retirement money to knock out the rest. Then I hit restart, cut my expenses to the bone and started reading as much about personal finance as I could.
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I guess I’m just wondering about why some people feel that they need to be debt free before marraige. What if you had $100,000 in student loans, does that mean that you would never marry her? Or if you lost your job and became unemployed and that pushed your plan back to 2012, would you have waited another 3 years to get married?
I understand not wanting to bring a “burden” into a marraige, but if you’ve already had several talks about marraige and sure that you want to get married, and are on the right path, I’m really not sure about why you would wait to be debt free to get married.
Also, cashing out your ROTH seems to be to be another form of instant gratification. I know on PF blogs people use instant gratification when talking about buying an expensive toy on credit because they don’t have enough self discipline to wait and save, but it’s the same thought process behind cashing out the ROTH – I want to be debt free and get married, NOW – I don’t want to wait another 3 years.
Also – I just want to let you know that I’m not criticizing your choices – I took $10,000 from my Roth to use as part of the 10% down payment on a house – I am just trying to understand the reasoning. I can understand postponing major life events if you aren’t financially ready, but I don’t understand postponing them until everything is financially perfect.
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