It was a lot of work. We use 1Password as well. Great app! We also have every bit of information saved in a program called Emergency Records. This application tracks every little financial and nonfinancial detail of your life. We exported the information and put it in our safe as well as our safe deposit box.

But we now have peace of mind and that’s what matters. And once you get through it all, you will have the same peace of mind.

When my father stopped driving, we kept the car insured until we decided what to do with it. Only after it was sold and the title transferred did we cancel the policy. Same with the house, once sold and in possession of the new owners, we canceled the policy. Both were with USAA, and they refunded the balance on the premium paid.

Sounds to me like an amazing business idea if it could be priced right with a decent level of knowledge on the subject.

I know that CPAs and lawyers can do this for you, but I also know what they charge and for most that amount is not reasonable.

Here is a video about how having paperwork together saved my family $14,000 when my dad died earlier this year.

http://www.chipsmoneytips.com/2011/05/avoiding-the-p-word/

- Chip

We always had separate finances–until now. We weren’t even joint account holders on our bank accounts, and believe me that posed some major problems for me while he was still in the ICU.

Also, we never kept track on one another’s passwords–until now.

And we never had power of attorney or any other legal documents. Still working on some of those, but this was a hard lesson to learn that you could need them at any age.

Plus, all bank accounts will be frozen, in the UK anyway, so things can be very tricky.

I need to make a ‘hit by a bus’ file so this is a good timely reminder!

I feel like I’ve been in this spot for the past 20 years, but in a good way. My parents set up a trust, and every year at Xmas my mother would send my brother and me down to our father’s office for the “annual review” of their estate, as we are the ultimate beneficiaries. In the beginning I did not pay as much attention to some of these more critical details that others here have mentioned, but that has ramped up considerably now. It was key that it was all out in the open, no secrets. They even prepaid their funerals and had the headstones in place.

My mother died 7 years ago, so it’s just been my father in charge. About 3-4 years ago we started to notice a few things that were off, and he had been very diligent for so long. The aging process was stepping into play (he’s now 95, so that wasn’t unexpected, just surprising). We knew (mostly) what to be on the watch for, but had a few unusual scenarios to deal with.

In 2009 he had a series of 4 falls and hospitalizations that led me to be with him about 2 weeks each time over the course of the year. Basically the process of making sure his finances were under control fell to me. I even reorganized the file cabinets so I could work with them my way (he had a very odd and cumbersome file organization system). He’s now been in assisted living for over a year, and it’s been a great relief for all of us. I also spent a good chunk of last summer getting the house ready to sell, then it sold in 2 weeks, then getting it cleared out for good. All of this was heavy on time and emotion.

I’ll echo what some others have said about what to do. Most folks should probably have the ‘Letter of Final Instructions’ – I feel like we’ve talked about it so much, and I’ve spent hours and hours inside his files that we are in good shape. Here are some things we’ve dealt with:
* Long term care insurance – my father has it, so it does ease the cost of his assisted living, with nominal out-of-pocket expense; I’m glad we have it, but his insurance company has really made us jump through hoops to get it figured out when we needed to use it; it’s still a cumbersome process – thankfully, my brother does most of this work, I do a little of the banking, and my father doesn’t have to deal with either.
* Chat about the funeral service wishes and kind of info desired in the notices; this was easy to do for my mother, but I feel like my father wants it different, so we’ll talk about it.
* Death certificate – get multiple copies, as they’ll be needed by various sources and some need the original.
* Bank accounts – make sure all parties who need to be are signors on the account; also, set up the online account to monitor payments, etc. My father doesn’t use a computer, but we can keep an eye on things this way.
* Credit cards & utility accounts – again, figure out who needs to be a signor or approved to be on the account (you aren’t financially responsible, just allowed to discuss the account and take action) (note: we had trouble closing a utility account, even though the house had been sold, as we were not ‘on the account’ – we are now for all his new ones just to be safe)
* Trust documents (or wills) – know where these docs are, and make sure to have a full set of all SIGNED documents (that’s what I’m doing next weekend, as there are a zillion unsigned sets, but we need the real thing to take any future action); this would also include any POAs for financial, medical, etc. Keep a copy of the POA for yourself, as you may need to fax it somewhere to show you have permission to act. Know what attorney to contact, if necessary.
* Tax returns – check that full copies are on file, ready to use; contact accountant/CPA/IRS for what to do for next year’s return.
* Benefits received – contact Social Security, military, insurance companies, anyone that makes payments; some will stop immediately on death, and others are connected to a final payout.
* Insurance companies – notify for any benefits to be paid on death, and to whom.
* Housing & utilities – find out the deadline for moving out of an apartment or assisted living; you may have to pay a month out of pocket.
* Newspaper & magazine subscriptions – get it transferred to another person to receive, or arrange for a refund if prepaid.

Sorry if I rambled too much, as this stuff is really fresh with me right now. If it sounds like a part-time job, it kind of is, but I’m mindful that my parents raised me, and that I can set aside some aspects of my current life, and help my father in his twilight years. The upside has been spending more quality time together and that’s been good.

We have been doing some heavy-duty retirement planning this year, and he is actually interested in that, because he wants to retire soon. But he still fell asleep (defense mechanism of choice) in the banker’s office. Oh well.

I use “KeePass” for password management, and have pointers from the LoI to KeePass.

One thing I’d like to see (possibly from contributions of the readers) is the other side of this story. Not what happens if *I* die, but what should I do if a loved one dies? Who to contact, places to look, etc.

For example,
Notify the IRS
Notify the SSA (if a retiree, or disabled)
Notify the military (if current or ex)
Notify employer
Notify Insurance company
Notify Bank/Financial Institution (taking into account comment 16)
Notify Utilities

And in each case, find out if there is any benefit due the deceased, or their spouse/family. Find out which will require a certified death certificate.

I’m sure there is much more; what does everyone think?

All we’ve got is a single sheet of paper with all our info which I update regularly. He’s more than capable of handling the finances in the event of my sudden death or incapacitation, he just doesn’t enjoy it.

My check register goes in the negative on occasion because I have an extra $1,000 that I pretend isn’t there in case a deposit doesn’t clear before I send out checks for bills, etc. Maybe she had a similar system?

I thought that was an interesting comment about the frozen joint account. I would never have thought to withdraw money before informing the bank of the death, but that makes sense to me. How is the bank to know you didn’t have a huge fight, and that while they are “dead” to you they actually might still be technically alive? Sadly, we all have to live with rules that are set for the worst case scenario.

http://lifehacker.com/5817021/in-case-of-emergency-how-to-organize-your-important-records-in-a-master-information-kit

Your mention of the checkbook and automatic payments were so similar. My grandparents maintained 2 checkbooks that they seemed to never reconcile together. Grampy’s checkbook, the one that paid the bills, was missing dates and check numbers – almost illegible as well. Still, it only took my grandmother, mom and me about an hour to get it figured out. He had a lot of accounts automatically drawing on the checking account, so it took a month or so to figure out where things were going. One funny incident was when I warned her their internet security was about to automatically renew – she forgot and thought it was an unauthorized charge, called her cc company and got a new card. Luckily, my grandmother is very frugal and was able to make it until everything was settled.

For years we encouraged her to at least become familiar with what was going on, but she refused. Grampy’s health took so many things away from him that she didn’t want to infringe on his pride. While we were getting things sorted out, she told my Mom and I that we should not be willfully ignorant like she was. It made a tough time that much more difficult.

I’ve started my own list for my folks, but i haven’t completed it yet. Definitely something to complete sooner rather than later.

When my father died, he had done estate planning and also prepaid his funeral home expenses (which were transferable to another state–important because we moved him a few years before he died). I’d been paying his bills, but didn’t realize until I went through some boxes that he had an outstanding credit card bill I didn’t know about. I don’t think I needed to pay it because it was several years old and probably charged off. But I felt obliged to do so. Remembering that and after reading this article, I just now updated all our account information and told my husband where to find it. Thank you for a great article. We do have a living revocable trust along with a will, which we did after finding out how easy everything was with my Dad’s trust after he died.

Another useful list (sorry if this was in story or comments and I missed it) is one of contacts, both IRL and online. My daughter prepared one for me and I one for her. There are a surprising number of people out there who would like to know if one of us died suddenly.

A great book is Jo Myers’ Good To Go. i came across it too late for dealing with my folks but for our own planning it’s helpful.

On the other hand, “T” had been preparing his estate for 30 years. When his health started failing, he did everything he could to make sure his passing went smoothly for his family. He set up a family trust, named an executor, a power-of-attorney, and two medical powers-of-attorney. He made sure there was always an open dialogue with everyone so that they knew what his wishes were. His files were organized and clearly labeled. Accounts were detailed with account numbers and login information in an easy-to-access location. Basically, the best case scenario.

Both situations taught me a lot. I shared what I learned with my own parents. This was a great article and it reminds me that even though I’m still young (26), there are even things I can do to prepare for any event.

Just because you are young and have no assets is no reason to not have a will. You may die in an event where a large settlement goes to your estate, and you don’t want someone else to say where it should go.

Thank you for the reminder about wills, though – ours need updating and I’ve put off the appointment.

It also makes me realize that I need to document my own life, as I am a single homeowner and, if I were to pass unexpectedly, my parents might
have a hard time figuring out my life