Come back in a few days and reread the drafts editing if necessary. Let Kris read yours and read Kris’ too.

I just got an eye opening experience writing on my blog and a message board (some is unpublished) and I learned more from that than I think years of counseling could have given me.

I think there’s something powerful in our audiences – I see things differently writing on line than even in my own private journals. Thankfully I get to decide whether I hit “Publish” or not.

I wish you two the best and my heart goes out to you both.

http://www.reecesrainbow.org

Fidelity has a Gifttrust fund that faciliates this. I’m sure other brokerages do also. They facilitate turning the stock into cash and giving the cash to the charity of your choosing

Unfortunately I have little time OR money right now, but when I’m decluttering I always give my excess books & other ‘stuff’ to an animal charity shop to sell.

On the radio Thursday, an eldercare specialist professed hope that boomers would be the first generation to not leave so much stuff – she thought boomers understood their heirs weren’t interested in Hummel collections or 30 years of National Geographics. Would be nice if she were right!

I wonder, JD, if your drive to neaten up before going to bed is partly that the apt is 100% your responsibility, partly your way of claiming the apt as your own personal space, and partly a way to ‘turn over a new leaf’ as you (re-)enter singlehood?? Or, don’t worry about the why – just embrace the new behavior

http://www.getrichslowly.org/blog/2011/09/24/a-minor-mistake-shopping-while-hungry/

Look: in case of trouble I’d much rather rely on a government program than on handouts from well-meaning people with missionary agendas. The last thing I want is for someone to say a prayer over my canned goods. Kindly pass the SNAP card and keep your beliefs to yourself. I’ll also take socialized medicine over religious health care that will refuse my family contraception.

Here’s an article about the real motivations behind a lot of charity:

http://www.slate.com/articles/arts/the_undercover_economist/2006/10/charity_is_selfish.html

Now, don’t get me wrong here, I’m not against helping others; my own mother volunteers in a cancer hospital in a 3rd world country, but a) she doesn’t get a tax deduction from it and b) it’s 3rd world country with not enough money to go around for everybody’s needs. And c) no, she doesn’t get in other people’s faces about volunteering or helping or whatever– she just does it quietly and cheerfully in her own time.

Preachy people: please be charitable to our ears and curb your sanctimony. If you love to give, please do so quietly and not for the public exposure or the pharisaic ego trip, and don’t use your charity as an excuse to demand that needed government programs be cut. Having a bake sale to purchase classroom supplies doesn’t magically make things right with your school district, but a tax hike targeted to support education just might.

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I’m aware this is a cranky reply to a comment I find irritating (even after I took deep breaths and edited out the harshest parts), but it would be nice to have a rational conversation about the pros and cons of charity vs. taxation or other mechanisms to address social problems.

Best wishes for you from across the Atlantic! I’m a long time reader, although I rarely post a comment. Wanted to say “thanks for sharing!”. Real life examples are the most inspiring ones and often make us rethink our own lifes (many times beyond financial frame).

P.S. Being Portuguese, I also smile reading about 15% tax rates. But Lisbon is a nice city, have you ever visited?

Thanks so much for being so forthcoming these past few weeks. I actually strayed from GRS for a while but have been coming back daily now because I’m really interested in what you are going through.

I would also like to hear a lot more about handling the “nestegg” my husband and I have been…er… incubating? one for a while and it is getting surprisingly big (although I know it doesn’t compete with yours).

I’d love to read and discuss more of this, but there are some inherent difficulties – 1, I know some readers find it difficult to relate to and 2, it’s okay to talk about your debt and financial struggles online, but I believe there’s a lot of baggage (some very valid, some not so valid) associated with talking candidly about wealth. I think there are some bloggers out there who do it, but few who do it well. I hope you continue to talk candidly (ideally even more candidly!) about your current perspective.

For instance, I’m now reading “The Power of Now” (or, rather, listening to the Spanish audiobook version). The section I just read/audited completely nailed one element of my personal philosophy that I’ve adopted since late September. That is, I try to be completely in the moment whenever I’m with somebody else. I put away my cell phone. I put away my computer. I focus only on them and on the conversation. This seems simple, but it has completely revolutionized how I deal with people. I am present in the moment. I am now. And that’s part of what’s going on with my change to a goal-less life. (Leo from Zen Habits is doing something like this too, I think.) I’m focusing on who I am now and what I need now. Sure, I still have a mind for the future, but most of my efforts are tied up with making sure I’m happy and healthy in the present. Because, as Eckhart Tolle (and Juleita Venegas) says, the present is the only thing there is.

The other thing I do is to quote full price on work I do for charity and then donate back, rather than giving them a discount. It makes it clear that my time has value and it also gives the organization help in making their financial numbers.

I expect I’ll own a house at some point, and I think a little part of me will be really sad then.

I completely relate to the not knowing, or caring, about the direction you are going. I was always so goal oriented, and after a friend passed away, I stopped going-going-going, and focused more on just BEING for a while. It just was a vast shift in my priorities and outlook.

Like the saying goes….I don’t know where I’m going, but I know I’m going somewhere.

Best of luck to you, and congratulations on your success.