When it is personal, like with friends or family, I usually make a semi-joking comment like, “I’m too cheap to…” (pay for cable/buy an iPhone/spend $8 on a movie ticket/etc.). I don’t really like to say I can’t afford something, because the truth is that I usually can — it’s just that I choose not to spend my money on some things, and I choose to stick to a budget.

I recently told a friend I wouldn’t be attending an event because, for me, it wasn’t worth the money. Later we were discussing the neighborhood I live in and she proclaimed, “You live there and you can’t afford to go to the conference?!” Besides being a presumptuous statement, she clearly didn’t understand me earlier when I said it wasn’t “worth the money” to attend the event.

“I can’t afford that” and “I choose not to spend my money on that” are very different perspectives….

There is nothing to be ashamed about being frugal – and yes I think your true friends will be respectful. I make fun of myself being frugal, but on the inside, I’m a lot more proud that I am financially responsible. People know me as being frugal (or even cheap) and some come to ask me for ideas/suggestions. But at least everyone knows where I am coming from (I’m not blowing them off because I don’t like them – and I’m usually up for more affordable things). I refuse to get into debt while pretty much everyone I know has a debt-ful life. Finding a partner/mate that also believes in the same philosophy is just very VERY hard though… haha…

Likewise, when I worked at McDonald’s I HATED selling up or asking if the person wanted fries with their order. When I first started I would “forget” to do that, but one day the manager was standing right next to me and kept adding it on for me, and then gave me grief for not doing it myself. Ugh.

(FWIW, I get my hair cut once or twice a year so the $40 or so isn’t a burden.)

Sometimes people just need to know where you’re coming from so they don’t think you’re judging them.

I do blog here and there, but not on finance stuff – most of my writing has been guest spots on GLBTQ blogs and is not exactly, shall we say, family-friendly so I’m loathe to link it here.

Ps. In response to the comment below yours, not that it matters one whit, but I’m actually a woman! I was raised around all boys, though, so in cases where people can’t actually “see” my gender, they tend to assume I’m a dude, and I really don’t mind either way.

The thing is, it can also serve as a litmus test for who is truly your friend. Is someone thinks a person is lame for not being able to afford something, that person might not be a true friend.

When we switched, we were paying around $80 for satellite TV. So the initial investments in the Roku box and antenna were paid for very quickly. Now we just pay $15.98 per month and have way more TV than we could ever want or need.

We said that we would get satellite TV again once our consumer debts were paid off but we have learned to love our inexpensive set-up.

I highly suggest going this route!!!!!!!

I was at a Comcast service center to return a piece of equipment that Comcast had provided to each customer in our neighborhood for free just last year, telling us that there’s no monthly charge. So, I’m returning it on principle because suddently Comcast decided that it is now going to charge everyone a monthly fee for this equipment. (Sneaky — get the “free” equipment in everyone’s home, then convert it to a monthly expense!) Anyway, when it was my turn, the rep greeted me by congratulating me that I am “eligible to get upgraded, faster internet service.” I said, “That sounds great, but would it cost me more money?” He says, “Yes, just $10 per month.” I tell him no thanks, that I am there to return equipment because I really need to save money. In fact, is there anything he can do to reduce my monthly cost? He says, no, I’m already on promo rates, and in fact my DVR is free. Well, I say, that I’m actually getting charged $8 per month for it. He says, no, the DVR is free; I’m paying $8 for HD service. So I say that I don’t need the HD service; could he please remove that? He tells me that he cannot because they only have HD DVRs, not standard DVRs, so if I want to be able to record, I have to have an HD DVR, thereby triggering the HD fee. So again he pitches that I’m getting DVR for free, as if the $8 HD fee (though I don’t use HD) were nothing. Still trying to convince me that this is a great deal, he tells me that it’s still a benefit because if I decided to connect an HD TV in the future then it won’t cost me any more. In fact, he says, I am “eligible to get upgraded, faster internet service” because I pay the HD fee. So now we’ve come full circle back to his opening of trying to pitch me the more expensive internet. Arg!!!

A priority for me this weekend is to research stand-alone internet options so that I can drop cable TV and just do Roku/Netflix/Hulu instead. (And thanks to those of you who read my rant and let me get that all off my chest!)

Am I the only one who found it ironic that I had to wade through credit card advertisements (that kept irritatingly flashing up whenever I tried to scroll across) to read this post?