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 Post subject: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:42 am 

Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:28 am
Posts: 10
I find myself asking this all the time. Unfortunately, there seem to be too few years in a regular life. I've got a job that to others seems amazing and that people write books about, but I'm constantly debating whether continuing it for another 13 years until I'm eligible for retirement is something that I want to do.

There are options for more specialized work within my community that would bring worlds more personal satisfaction, at what cost to my ultimate goals though? Along with that, how do I define my ultimate goals? I suffer from what I like to refer to as daydreamers ADHD. I've tried writing it all down, I've tried talking to other folks, seeing what the wife thinks (bless her heart she just wants to support me in whatever I chose and won't make up my mind for me) but I just can't decide what I want to do.

How did you chose what to do and how has it played out for you thus far? Do you still dream of other lives you could have lived? I know this seems more like a counseling session, it's always very informative to hear from others though about how they shaped their lives.


Last edited by Frogger on Thu Oct 17, 2013 10:45 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject: Re: What do I want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Wed Oct 16, 2013 11:48 pm 

Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2013 2:30 am
Posts: 155
It is not worth thinking of what others did in their life. Everyone has their own life and have their own share of problems. You cannot compare yourself with them unless you are in their shoes. So, it is better to avoid thinking about others and think of your own life. You will have to understand your own dreams and aspiration and then decide how you will have to fulfil it. You have to convince yourself to stop being a daydreamer!

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 Post subject: Re: What do I want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 10:50 am 

Joined: Tue Oct 15, 2013 10:28 am
Posts: 10
Jerry wrote:
It is not worth thinking of what others did in their life. Everyone has their own life and have their own share of problems. You cannot compare yourself with them unless you are in their shoes. So, it is better to avoid thinking about others and think of your own life. You will have to understand your own dreams and aspiration and then decide how you will have to fulfil it. You have to convince yourself to stop being a daydreamer!


I get what you're saying, however I'm not asking for a blueprint of someones life so I can emulate it. I'm trying to start conversation, poll others to see what decisions they made career wise and whether those decisions played out the way they expected and hoped them to.

I'll never convince myself to stop being a daydreamer, and I'll never recommend someone not chase a dream they have just for the sake of not having to worry about it. If I never dreamed and fought to accomplish those dreams, I wouldn't live the life I do now.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 11:07 am 
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Joined: Wed Sep 23, 2009 9:01 am
Posts: 5205
If I did not need to worry about money, if I were independently wealthy, I would probably be doing something different. It's not that I don't like my job or my field. But it's not what I do for fun. I chose my career based partly on a field where I could earn good money.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 2:48 pm 

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 3:05 pm
Posts: 1263
I think my main regret, and the thing I'd change, is that I ended up in a career that has me chained to a desk and computer most of the day. I'm much happier when I'm moving around, and even happier if that moving around is happening outdoors. My first career was in environmental education, and in some respects I wish I'd stuck with it. But my first few jobs in that field paid barely enough to keep me above poverty level.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Thu Oct 17, 2013 3:31 pm 

Joined: Tue Jun 12, 2012 4:34 pm
Posts: 414
Frogger wrote:
How did you chose what to do and how has it played out for you thus far?


Honestly, most of my career moves have been unplanned. Instead of focusing on deciding what I want to be when I grow up, I've focused on continuing my education and training, increasing my certifications and marketable skills, and expanding my network of colleagues. From there, I've pursued opportunities that interested me as they arose. In most cases, the prepatory steps I took along the way (before I even knew about said opportunities) were the catalyst that gave me the edge over other candidates.

Overall, this approach has worked very well, allowing me to advance rapidly in my career. (Most of my colleagues at this level are 15-20 years my senior.) And, this approach has let me into a career field that I love that has taken me all over the world.

Frogger wrote:
Do you still dream of other lives you could have lived?


If I had a mulligan, I'd be an astronaut. I was deeply interested in physics and space when I was a child. Unfortunately, there were so few female role models and I received very little encouragement in my formative years to pursue this, so I moved on to other things. I absolutely love my current job and I don't regret my life. But I wish I could have gone into space, and I have a feeling I'll still have that regret on my deathbed (hopefully decades from now).


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Fri Oct 18, 2013 3:21 am 

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 3:05 pm
Posts: 1263
alohabear wrote:
Honestly, most of my career moves have been unplanned. Instead of focusing on deciding what I want to be when I grow up, I've focused on continuing my education and training, increasing my certifications and marketable skills, and expanding my network of colleagues.


In some ways this has been my approach. I've worked in a lot of jobs in a wide variety of fields; in a nutshell my career happened to me. I think the main benefit of that is that if I lost my job I probably wouldn't be unemployed for long since I have such a broad range of experience. I've worked as a dishwasher, warehouse laborer, landscaper/gardener, environmental educator, expedition coordinator, program manager, university research administrator, journalist, writer, editor, project manager, webmaster, and probably a few other things I'm forgetting. Some of those hats were worn in just one job.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Sat Oct 26, 2013 6:50 am 

Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 6:21 am
Posts: 2
alohabear wrote:
Honestly, most of my career moves have been unplanned. Instead of focusing on deciding what I want to be when I grow up, I've focused on continuing my education and training, increasing my certifications and marketable skills, and expanding my network of colleagues. From there, I've pursued opportunities that interested me as they arose. In most cases, the prepatory steps I took along the way (before I even knew about said opportunities) were the catalyst that gave me the edge over other candidates.


I can relate to the 'unplanned career' plan. I think many of us simply moved from one opportunity to the next, thinking that we should instead have some sort of 'master plan' that will deliver us to our 'chosen destiny.' The problem is that we end up looking at these supposed competing aspects - the either or - of making money or doing something we love, assuming we even know what that is! Lately I've become a big fan of 'AND' instead of 'OR.' Could it be possible to make the kind of money you want AND do what you love?

Certainly there are people that do it. And when you ask them how, they will usually tell you that they 'followed thier passion.' Sounds trite - but there is a basic underlying truth about this approach. If you are passioniate about something, you tend to find deep wells of energy and focus that give you the 'juice' to actually be successful!

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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Sun Oct 27, 2013 8:11 am 

Joined: Thu Apr 05, 2007 3:05 pm
Posts: 1263
mattyd wrote:
Could it be possible to make the kind of money you want AND do what you love? Certainly there are people that do it. And when you ask them how, they will usually tell you that they 'followed thier passion.' Sounds trite - but there is a basic underlying truth about this approach.


Actually a lot of people feel this approach gets things backwards. Passion usually develops from applying yourself to something worthwhile, and many people who have tried to turn their passions into careers discovered that turning "passion" into "work" drained all the passion and joy from what they loved doing. It worked better as a hobby or side interest.

To read the evidence that "following your passion" is not good career advice in general, see http://80000hours.org/blog/63-do-what-you-re-passionate-about-part-2.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Tue Oct 29, 2013 7:01 am 

Joined: Tue Oct 29, 2013 6:46 am
Posts: 3
When I grow up, I will more travel and explore the world.. but first, I need more money to do that :)


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Sat Nov 30, 2013 1:24 am 

Joined: Mon Sep 23, 2013 11:52 pm
Posts: 10
Hello,
Well believing in yourself is a most important thing from that you can do achieve whatever you can... :emo:


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Mon Dec 02, 2013 8:58 am 

Joined: Sat Oct 26, 2013 6:21 am
Posts: 2
brad wrote:
Actually a lot of people feel this approach gets things backwards.


Interesting. I think it's important to examine various points of view on the subject. I prefer to see the opportunity and potential as a positive. I think this TED video featuring Scott Dinsmore http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jpe-LKn-4gM captures that approach quite well.

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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Tue Dec 10, 2013 7:00 am 

Joined: Mon Dec 09, 2013 11:08 am
Posts: 8
Location: Accra, Ghana
I had always wanted to be bank manager, but when I grew, I realised how limited I was. My society taught me to think that certain jobs are the goldmines, but now that I can decide for myself, I think I love programming, lecturing and mentoring.

I had studied to fulfill this goal according. I am passionate about what I do and am happy with it.
Many people are not fulfilled simply because they were pushed to do certain programs they have regretted of doing.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Thu Dec 26, 2013 3:47 pm 

Joined: Wed Dec 11, 2013 9:56 am
Posts: 13
mattyd wrote:
Could it be possible to make the kind of money you want AND do what you love?

Certainly there are people that do it. And when you ask them how, they will usually tell you that they 'followed thier passion.' Sounds trite - but there is a basic underlying truth about this approach. If you are passioniate about something, you tend to find deep wells of energy and focus that give you the 'juice' to actually be successful!


Passion is part of the equation, but just part. Not everyone will be a Bon Jovi or Picasso or Tom Clancy. For every one of them, there's thousands of starving artists. Perhaps that works for some people, but it doesn't do much for me.

If I had "followed" my passions, I'd either be trying to play music for a living or trying to be a professional athlete. While I really enjoy both, and was passionate about both as a teenager, I certainly wasn't going to be paying any bills with those dreams.

I think the more appropriate advice is to be passionate. My job is, by most peoples' definitions, very un-sexy. But after taking the best option available to me when I graduated into the 2008 job market and working at a soul-crushing company for my first three years, I realized I could just be really damn good at what I was doing. Even if the company was (in my 24-year-old mind) run by a bunch of jerks, I was going to work hard so I could build my resume. Even if the pay wasn't very good, I was going to stay after 5, work weekends, get my numbers up, and use it as a springboard.

Mike Rowe (the guy from Dirty Jobs,) starting something called the Mike Rowe Works Foundation. I won't quote the whole site here, but there's a pledge on the site that I think a lot of people could benefit from.


Mike Rowe Works Foundation wrote:
1. I believe that I have won the greatest lottery of all time. I am alive. I walk the Earth. I live in America. Above all things, I am grateful.

2. I believe that I am entitled to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. Nothing more. I also understand that “happiness” and the “pursuit of happiness” are not the same thing.

3. I believe there is no such thing as a “bad job.” I believe that all jobs are opportunities, and it’s up to me to make the best of them.

4. I do not “follow my passion.” I bring it with me. I believe that any job can be done with passion and enthusiasm.

5. I deplore debt, and do all I can to avoid it. I would rather live in a tent and eat beans than borrow money to pay for a lifestyle I can’t afford.

6. I believe that my safety is my responsibility. I understand that being in “compliance” does not necessarily mean I’m out of danger.

7. I believe the best way to distinguish myself at work is to show up early, stay late, and cheerfully volunteer for every crappy task there is.

8. I believe the most annoying sounds in the world are whining and complaining. I will never make them. If I am unhappy in my work, I will either find a new job, or find a way to be happy.

9. I believe that my education is my responsibility, and absolutely critical to my success. I am resolved to learn as much as I can from whatever source is available to me. I will never stop learning, and understand that library cards are free.

10. I believe that I am a product of my choices – not my circumstances. I will never blame anyone for my shortcomings or the challenges I face. And I will never accept the credit for something I didn’t do.

11. I understand the world is not fair, and I’m OK with that. I do not resent the success of others.

12. I believe that all people are created equal. I also believe that all people make choices. Some choose to be lazy. Some choose to sleep in. I choose to work my butt off.


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 Post subject: Re: What do you want to do when you grow up?
PostPosted: Fri Jan 10, 2014 7:52 pm 

Joined: Thu Jan 02, 2014 2:15 pm
Posts: 4
I believe I've pretty much grown up, but I'm not done growing. That's the thing I believe is important ....to continue living life; learning to expand knowledge, interests and capacities; and dreaming forward of how you want next steps and future seasons to be for you. Prepare ahead by saving some money so you'll always be able to get by the speed bumps and potholes in life, and yet live today too and especially with those who are most dear to you ...so make precious memories every season of the year.
Enjoy the journey -- it will be awesome.
BW


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