Several months ago I mentioned in passing that my wife and I keep separate finances. I promised to eventually explain why, and to discuss the pros and cons of doing so.<\/p>\n
When I was a boy, my parents fought about money often. And loudly. They had joint finances, but it didn’t seem to matter. Each accused the other of being financially irresponsible. (Both were right.) Their example left me disenchanted with the notion of mutual money management.<\/p>\n
During the years Kris and I dated, we had our own accounts. From the beginning, I was a spendthrift and Kris was a saver. She always made smart financial decisions. Because my money was my money, and her money was her money, my poor choices did not drain her savings.<\/p>\n
When we were married in 1993, it didn’t occur to us to combine our finances. I can’t recall that we even discussed the issue. It seemed natural to maintain the status quo<\/i>. Some people find this strange; they feel that it fundamentally undermines the nature of marriage. But it’s one of the best things we’ve ever done. This system works for us because:<\/p>\n This system also works because we trust each other to take care of financial obligations. (Even when I was a spendthrift, bills and household expenses always came first.) Now that I’m making smart choices, we do have one joint account for use solely as an emergency fund.<\/p>\n Which is better: joint or separate finances? Both sides offer strong arguments. Good reasons to combine finances include:<\/p>\n On the other hand, there are also good reasons to keep your finances separate:<\/p>\n I don’t believe there’s one right answer to this question. The best choice is the one that works for you and your partner.<\/b> This is something that you<\/i> need to decide. Don’t let anyone \u2014 not your church, not your parents, not your friends, not some personal finance guru \u2014 tell you that there’s only one right way. Each relationship is different.<\/p>\n I love my wife, and believe that maintaining separate finances has strengthened our relationship, not weakened it. But that might not be true for you and your situation. If you and your spouse are happier with joint finances, if joint finances strengthen your marriage, then use joint finances. But don’t combine finances just because you think it has to be done that way. It doesn’t..<\/p>\n What’s most important is honesty and communication. Any system in which the partners are open about their money habits is a good one. Ultimately, it comes down to this: Do what works for you<\/b><\/a>.<\/p>\n You can find more excellent discussions and advice about this subject at these sites:<\/p>\n Do you and your partner keep joint accounts or separate? How has this arrangement worked for you? How long have you been together? How equitable is your income distribution? Who pays the bills? How often do you fight about money? What else can you tell us about the way you handle your finances?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" Several months ago I mentioned in passing that my wife and I keep separate finances. I promised to eventually explain why, and to discuss the pros and cons of doing so.<\/p>\n When I was a boy, my parents fought about money often. And loudly. They had joint finances, but it didn’t seem to matter. Each accused the other of being financially irresponsible. (Both were right.) Their example left me disenchanted with the notion of mutual money management.<\/p>\n During the years Kris and I dated, we had our own accounts. From the beginning, I was a spendthrift and Kris was a saver. She always made smart financial decisions. Because my money was my money, and her money was her money, my poor choices did not drain her savings.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3287,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[496],"acf":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1057"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3287"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1057"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1057\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1057"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1057"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}\n
<\/span>Pros and cons<\/span><\/h2>\n
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<\/span>The bottom line<\/span><\/h2>\n
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<\/span>Your turn<\/span><\/h2>\n
Our story<\/h2>\n