Last Wednesday evening I lost it, really lost it. Miserable heat and humidity, smog, too much walking on too little sleep, an asthma attack, dueling deadlines, and maybe just a smidge of menopausal mood swings had me alternately raging and sniveling in a borrowed studio apartment on Manhattan’s Upper East Side.<\/p>\n
A magazine editor with whom I’d met earlier that day wanted more information so she could pitch my ideas more effectively. Due to a scheduling issue the MSN Money editor requested two posts instead of one. My usual Get Rich Slowly deadline is Sunday but J.D. had asked for the piece by Friday if possible. And I had an unbreakable, business-related appointment at noon the next day, which meant leaving by 11:15 a.m.<\/p>\n
\u201cI can’t do this,\u201d I wheeze-whimpered. \u201cI’m so tired. And I’m in New York, dammit! I quit! I quit<\/em>!\u201d<\/p>\n Then I thought of Marilyn vos Savant, the smartest woman in the world, and got hold of myself.<\/p>\n A while back the Parade magazine columnist had explained why self-administered foot rubs<\/a> don’t feel as good as when someone else massages us<\/a>: Because we are constantly bombarded with sensory stimulation, our bodies dial back any stimuli we produce on our own.<\/p>\n \u201cThis allows you to ignore sensations that don’t warrant attention, such as the pressure on your foot every time you take a step,\u201d vos Savant wrote. \u201cIt also explains why brushing your own tangled hair hurts less than when your hairdresser does it.\u201d<\/p>\n Spinning my wheels<\/strong><\/em> Yes, there is lots to be done and I don’t feel good.<\/em><\/p>\n But it doesn’t all HAVE to be done tonight.<\/em><\/p>\n The only person putting pressure on me IS me.<\/em><\/p>\n I stopped spinning my wheels and got to work. I also thought about vos Savant’s words as they apply to personal finance.<\/p>\n De-tangling your own hair isn’t so bad, but you’ll likely yelp if somebody else rakes a comb through your knotty locks. That goes for money issues, too: Self-imposed financial choices hurt less, or are at least easier to rationalize, than financial choices imposed upon us.<\/strong><\/p>\n Nothing’s certain<\/strong><\/em> \u201cI probably shouldn’t have taken that cruise\/bought that new car<\/a> right now,<\/em> but I really want it\/deserve it<\/em>.\u201d<\/p>\n But when our finances go kerplunk, how many of us are really willing to admit culpability? We’re much more likely to come up with other reasons why the books won’t balance:<\/p>\n See how nicely that works? We don’t have to take personal responsibility for our decisions at all!<\/p>\n Well, except for the fact that:<\/p>\n
\nCall it \u201cdeus ex Marilyn\u201d: The memory of that explanation helped me cut through my seemingly unsolvable problem. That is to say, it helped me look calmly and rationally at what was going on:<\/p>\n
\nEver heard something like this come out of someone’s mouth, or your own?:<\/p>\n\n
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