{"id":235841,"date":"2018-04-17T05:00:04","date_gmt":"2018-04-17T12:00:04","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/getrichslowly.org\/?p=235841"},"modified":"2024-03-05T21:42:06","modified_gmt":"2024-03-06T04:42:06","slug":"building-confidence","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.getrichslowly.org\/building-confidence\/","title":{"rendered":"How to build confidence and destroy fear"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"HowMy mission at Get Rich Slowly is to help readers achieve personal and financial freedom. I want to help you master your money and<\/em> your life.<\/strong><\/p>\n

Generally speaking, we focus almost exclusively on the financial side of the things. This week, I’m going to shift gears and share some of the things I’ve learned about overcoming fear, finding happiness, and achieving personal freedom. (Don’t worry. We’ll get back to the hard-core financial talk very soon.)<\/p>\n

In December’s discussion of wealth habits<\/a>, I talked about what T. Harv Eker calls “financial blueprints”. Actually, I talk about them all of the time. Understanding your money blueprint<\/a> is a vital part of changing your relationship with money.<\/p>\n

Our blueprints are created through lifelong exposure to money messages received from people around us, especially our family and friends, and from our country\u2019s culture and mass media. Eker says the unfortunate truth is that most of us have faulty blueprints that prevent us from building wealth.<\/p>\n

\u201cWhen the subconscious mind must choose between deeply rooted emotions and logic, emotions will almost always win,\u201d writes Eker.<\/p>\n

He says that most of us are motivated by fear, especially when it comes to money. We don\u2019t call it fear, though. We say we\u2019re motivated by security. Eker notes \u2014 correctly \u2014 that fear and security are essentially two sides of the same coin. The tough truth is that money doesn\u2019t dissolve fear<\/strong>.<\/p>\n

Eker writes:<\/p>\n

Fear is not just a problem, it\u2019s a habit. Therefore, making more money will only change the kind of fear we have. When we were broke, we were most likely afraid we\u2019d never make it or never have enough. Once we make it, however, our fear usually changes to “What if I lose what I\u2019ve made?”<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Like Eker, I’ve found that fear motivates a lot<\/em> of people. Instead of making decisions based on goals and desired outcomes, most folks make fear-based decisions. As a result, they get less out of life than they’d hoped, less out of life then they might if they knew how to overcome their fears. (For more about this, see last week’s article about scarcity mindset versus abundance mindset<\/a>.)<\/p>\n

I’m not judging. I’ve been there. For years, I let fear rule my life. But over the past decade, I’ve learned how to quell many of my fears. Better still, I’ve learned how to act in spite of my fear. As a result, my life (financial and otherwise) has drastically improved.<\/p>\n

Today, I want to teach you<\/em> how to destroy fear and build confidence. To begin, let’s talk about death.<\/p>\n

Note:<\/strong><\/em> Long-time readers have seen some of this material in other forms. This is my attempt to gather all<\/em> of it into one place.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

<\/span>The Regrets of the Dying<\/span><\/h2>\n

Australian singer-songwriter Bronnie Ware worked in palliative care for many years, spending time with men and women near death. As she worked with her patients, she listened to them describe their fear, anger, and remorse. She noticed recurring themes.<\/p>\n

In 2009, Ware wrote about her experience in a blog post that went viral<\/a>. She turned that article into a book called The Top Five Regrets of the Dying<\/em><\/a>. When people die, she says, they often express one or more of the following sentiments:<\/p>\n