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Your financial family tree: What our parents teach us about money

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Last weekend, Kim and I flew to Utah for a reunion with friends from the 2016 chautauqua in Ecuador. While in Salt Lake City, we met up with Jesse Mecham (the founder of You Need a Budget), visited Utah Olympic Park, and attended a Sunday morning performance of the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Our group also spent an entire afternoon at the Mormon Family History Library, where we explored our genealogy. Not everyone was enthused about researching their family tree at first, but eventually even those who thought the exercise would be lame found themselves wrapped in it. It's fun — and enlightening — to unravel the threads of time and discover who your ancestors were and where they came from.

Kim at the Family History Library

Flying home from Salt Lake City, I got to thinking about how our family trees don't just influence our genetics. We inherit more than physical features from those who came before us. We also inherit culture and psychology and values. And yes, we inherit financial habits from our parents and grandparents.

Each of us has a financial family tree.

My Financial Family Tree

I write often about our money blueprints, the set of subconscious “scripts” that define our behaviors and attitudes toward money. Society at large — our friends, co-workers, the mass media — plays a role in writing these scripts, but most of our money blueprints are inherited from our family — especially our parents.

In a way, it's as if our money blueprints are a product of our financial family trees. Our grandparents passed their feelings about money to their children, and these children instilled their habits and attitudes into us.

When I look at my own relationship with money, it's easy to see how my present actions and attitudes — even at nearly fifty years old! — were inherited from my parents. [Read more…]

Spare change: Awesome articles from elsewhere

How to give better advice

Do a home inventory now to avoid heartache later

Persistence is the key to success and wealth

Debt: A love story [painful, real life example of high earners deep in debt]

There isn't any universal financial "truth"

How a data scientist hunts for houses

How to safely and securely dispose of your old gadgets

How companies trick you into paying more for the same product

The tricks stores use to get you to spend more money

Should you track your net worth?

Find an archive of all past spare change links on Pinboard.

Upcoming money events that might be of interest to GRS readers

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A lot of things have changed in the world of money since I founded Get Rich Slowly in April 2006. Nowadays, for instance, there are many more opportunities to meet up with like-minded folks in Real Life. From annual retreats like Camp Mustache to monthly meet-ups with Choose FI local groups, it's never been easier to connect with other money bosses!

In fact, today there are almost too many events to keep track! I have a stack of invites and announcements in my inbox. Rather than write about each one individually, I thought I'd take this time to share some of my favorites all at once.

Here are some upcoming money events that might be of interest to GRS readers. (At the end of this page, I'll include my planned public speaking gigs for 2019.)

Financial Freedom Online Course

First up, Douglas Tsoi is presenting another edition of his highly-popular Finance Freedom course starting December 1st.

Tsoi is the founder of Portland Underground Graduate School (or PUGS), a grass-roots alternative education program for everybody. PUGS courses are designed to be both affordable and relevant to everyday life. (Classes include things like Sex Ed for Adults, The Art of Effective Communication, and, yes, Pizza School!)

The PUGS Financial Freedom course is a two-month, self-paced class containing 32 lessons related to the basics of personal finance: budgeting, money blueprints, setting goals, and reducing consumption. Although the class is online-only, you're not going this alone. Each cohort has a private discussion forum. And after the class is over, members often form long-term support groups to help each other achieve their financial goals.

Here's a testimonial from one couple who took the PUGS Financial Freedom course:

Tsoi and I collaborated earlier this year to present a three-hour Financial Freedom workshop here in Portland. I didn't know him before that project, but now I consider him a close ally in the quest to promote financial education. He's both passionate and sincere, and his message is very much aligned with my own.

If you've been looking for some sort of group-based opportunity to improve your own financial skills, check out the PUGS Financial Freedom course. (Tsoi also offers a second Financial Freedom course that covers more advanced topics.)

Lola Financial Retreat for Women

Next, my friend Melanie Lockert (founder of the fantastic Dear Debt blog) is back for her third year hosting the Lola Retreat, a weekend financial forum for women only. She'll host two events in 2019. The first is in Los Angeles from February 15th to 17th.

Get Rich Slowly is sponsoring a scholarship to the L.A. Lola Retreat. We'll be paying for one person's ticket to the event (but not travel and lodging). If you're interested, apply for a scholarship here.

Because this is a “no boys allowed” event, I asked former attendee Kate Nesi (who hosts the Lifelong Learning Podcast) to share some of her experiences at the Lola Retreat. Here's what she had to say:

Rarely do we open up about our financial situations, and while I try to share with others in person, it’s a clammy subject. The Lola Retreat was a safe space to open up, discuss, ask questions, and really dive into money.

There were two days of sessions. Throughout those talks I learned a great deal about what other ladies in the room may be struggling with, or how I might shape our financial future as a family. The panel discussion was very touching with moments of tears for the situations women have been in due to financial pressure. It was intense and took a lot out of me mentally, but in such a positive way.

Overall, the weekend was wonderfully exhausting with so much good information to pack into such a short time. The information was amazing, insightful, and each woman brought something very different to the table. I would highly recommend going to the Lola Retreat in the future!

There were women I met and have kept in touch with from as far away as California, and to the south in Florida. I look forward to continuing to follow their money journeys and supporting other women on their own financial journey after having been a part of Lola.

I cannot recommend a retreat more than Lola for women to get comfortable sharing and learning about money!

I've talked with several other women who have attended past Lola Retreats. Like Nesi, they all have great things to say about the event. If you've been looking for a chance to meet other women who want to master their money, you should consider the Lola Retreat

Other Upcoming Events for Money Bosses

While these are the two events for which registration is now open, there are lots of others that are still in the planning stages (and/or sold out).

For instance, you've probably heard me mention the annual chautauquas in the past. These intensive week-long events have been held in Ecuador, Greece, and the U.K. I've spoken at both the money-themed chautauqua and the happiness-themed chautauqua.

In early October 2019, I will be presenting on “money and purpose” at a money-themed chautauqua in Portugal. The precise date and location of the event are still to be determined. If you'd like to participate, sign up for the mailing list here so you'll be among the first to hear when the details are announced.

While the chautauquas are awesome, life-changing experiences, not everyone has the time and money required to attend. Fortunately, Camp FI offers an affordable alternative.

Camp FI events are held in a variety of locations around the U.S. They're low-key gatherings at which a few dozen folks come together to talk about money and meaning for a long weekend. Plus, we tend to drink a lot of beer. (And whisky.) I've spoken at four previous Camp FI events, always giving a variation of the following talk:

In mid-October 2019, I'll be speaking at Camp FI: Southwest in Joshua Tree, California. Kim may or may not be with me (we haven't decided yet). Our hound dog may or may not be with us. Tickets have already sold out for half of next year's Camp FI events. I'm not sure how many are left for Joshua Tree. If you'd like to join us, you should book soon!

Last, but not least, here's something that's an event in another sense.

A few years ago, I came up with the idea of opening a “money store”, a place where I could provide down-to-earth financial advice for average people. I never followed through on that. My friend Shannon McLay, however, did follow through on her own vision for something similar.

In 2016, Shannon opened the Financial Gym in New York City. Her goal is to provide top-quality financial advice to everyone, not just folks with half a million dollars to invest. Last week, Shannon and her Financial Gym were featured on the Today show! Take a look:

Congratulations, Shannon! For anyone else who lives in New York City: If you're looking for help in achieving financial fitness, you should drop in and visit the Financial Gym. (Full disclosure: I invested $50,000 of my own personal cash in this business, so I have a vested interested in seeing it succeed.)

Fiology: The online encyclopedia of financial independence

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FiologyFiology is a brand-new site that I believe will interest many Get Rich Slowly readers. It's an attempt to gather in one place related articles about a variety of common topics from the world of financial independence and early retirement.

Here's how Fiology founder David Baughier describes his goals:

My motivations for Fiology are simple – to share the message of Financial Independence while highlighting some of the best and brightest in the Financial Independence community on the internet. At no point will a visitor be charged by me to access the information on the site.

The majority of the material Fiology uses is free and readily available elsewhere on the internet. The value of Fiology is that it takes that information and organizes it into an easy reference that we can share with those interested in the concept of Financial Independence.

It's a simple concept, but it's also brilliant.

Each of the 53 lessons covers one specific topic. These lessons range from the milestones of financial independence to caring for aging parents, from geoarbitrage to retirement account basics, from compound interest to happiness. The lessons contain blog posts, news articles, podcasts, and YouTube videos, plus suggested apps, books, and tools.

Let's use one of my pet subjects as an example. Lesson two at Fiology is called “Why FI”, and it's all about figuring out why you want to retire early. Here's a screenshot of the resources Baughier has pulled together on the subject:

Why FI?

I appreciate that Fiology is uncomplicated and easy to navigate. Because its aim is to be a central resource, it's not bogged down by a lot of baggage. Baughier is able to gather information and present it in an accessible format. I also like that, if you'd like, you can subscribe to a weekly email so that you can consume all of the lessons over the course of a year.

Here is a list of all the lessons from Fiology (along with links to related GRS material, when appropriate):

Fiology is a valuable reference for anyone interested in financial independence and early retirement. It's a site well-worth bookmarking. It's going to become the first place I visit when I'm researching articles and need help.

How to retire early: Early retirement by the numbers

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More and more, I'm meeting people who want to know how to retire early. There's been a lot of buzz in the media lately about early retirement, and that's led folks to wonder how much money they would need to quit their jobs — or if early retirement is even something they should consider.

Why retire early? Well, for most people a job is a necessary evil. We work because we have to. Early retirement gives us the flexibility to choose how we spend our time, whether that entails sitting on the beach drinking margaritas or it leads to new work that provides meaning and fulfillment.

Lots of us dream of leaving the workplace in our forties or fifties instead of sticking it out until age 65 — but we keep working to support the lifestyles to which we've become accustomed. We like our iPhones and Playstations and Priuses, so we surrender to the idea that we'll have fifty-year careers.

Still, there are a surprising number of folks who manage to retire young. In fact, the 2018 EBRI Retirement Confidence Survey found that 35% of retirees left the workforce before they turned 60. (Previous surveys have shown that 18% of people retire by age 55.)

These folks aren't lucky lottery winners, and most didn't have high-paying careers. In general, those who manage to retire early have opted to live with less when they're younger so they can obtain financial freedom before they're too old to enjoy it.

Early retirement is a fantastic goal, but it can be tough to achieve. Three major obstacles stand in your way:

  • You have less time to earn money. If you start working at 20 and retire at 65, you have 45 income-producing years. But if you retire at 45, you only have 25 income-producing years.
  • You spend more time living on your savings. Life expectancy for the average American is nearly 80 years. If you retire at 65, your savings will probably have to last only ten to twenty years; if you retire at 45, your savings may need to support you for thirty or forty years.
  • You don't enjoy traditional retirement benefits. If you retire young, you can't access Social Security or Medicare for several years — or decades. You also face penalties if you choose to access your retirement accounts before you reaching minimum age requirements. (I'm experiencing issues with this gap already!)

In short, early retirees have less time to make money, and that money has to last them longer. Even if you stay healthy and the economy cooperates, that's asking a lot.

That's not to say you shouldn't plan to retire early — it's a laudable goal, one that I encourage here at Get Rich Slowly — but if you're serious about doing so, you need to be diligent. You need to have a plan. And you need to understand the numbers.

Let's take a look at the basics of how to retire early — and why you might want to do so.

How to retire early [Read more…]

Why don’t Americans save?

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A new report from the Center for Financial Services Innovation says that only 28% of Americans are financially healthy. And it reinforces something we already knew: The U.S. saving rate sucks. Americans don't save.

The U.S. Financial Health Pulse divides people into three tiers of financial health.

  • Financially healthy people (28% of the U.S., 70 million people) are “spending saving, borrowing, and planning in a way that will allow them to be resilient and pursue opportunities over time.”
  • Financially coping people (55%, 138 million) are “struggling with some, but not necessarily all, aspects of their financial lives.”
  • Financially vulnerable people (17%, 42 million) are “struggling with all, or nearly all, aspects of their financial lives.”

Financial health of Americans

The full report is huge — it's an 80-page PDF! — and filled with data based on survey responses from 5000 people. The document does a great job of presenting the info, separating it into four major sections (spend, save, borrow, plan), then comparing how people in each financial health tier differ in their approaches.

Here, for instance, are the results for the survey question about saving rate:

Saving rate among Americans

In the nearly thirteen years I've been writing Get Rich Slowly, I've seen reports like this over and over and over again. It's a constant refrain: American's don't save. But why don't they save?

The U.S. Saving Rate

There's a tendency in some circles to blame outside forces for our national inability to save. “People can't save because the economy sucks. Incomes are low and expenses are high.”

I'm not going to say that stagnating wages don't play a part in the problem, but I dont think they're a primary factor. In fact, if you look at a chart of the U.S. saving rate over time, you can see a surprising pattern. (This data comes from the Federal Reserve and the U.S. Bureau of Economic Analysis.)

U.S. Saving Rate Over Time

See those grey shaded areas in the chart above? Those are recessions. When the economy is bad, people tend to save more. When the economy is booming — the mid 1980s, the late 1990s, the mid 2000s, now — people save less. This takes the teeth out of the whole “people can't save because of the economy” argument.

I think the problem with the American saving rate is complex. There are many forces working together to depress saving rates in this country. [Read more…]

What we talk about when we talk about risk

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Everybody’s financial situation — age, income, saving rate — is different.

But every retiree, early or late, aspiring or actual, has the same, simple investing imperative: We must preserve and grow our purchasing power in real terms in order to finance decades of future consumption.

This sounds simple (which it is) and obvious (which it isn’t).

The Declining Value of Your Dollars

Let's assume you're forty years old. Every week, you buy a six-pack of your favorite microbrew for $10. You have $520 in savings that will buy you your weekly six-pack for all of 2019. Life is good.

Here, for instance, is GRS founder J.D. Roth with a $10.19 six-pack of his favorite beer, which he's drinking while he edits this article:

J.D. with a six-pack of his favorite beer

Now, let's assume that the cost of this six-pack increases by 3% annually — which is a reasonable estimate of inflation. Every year, your $520 in savings buys you 3% less beer.

In thirty years, when you’re seventy and still enjoying your suds, that six-pack that costs you $10 now will cost you $24.27, which is a $1,262 annual expense if you continue to buy a six-pack a week.

In other words, your $520 in savings has to increases by nearly 145% to $1,262 over the next thir[s]ty years to merely maintain — let alone increase — your current beer consumption.

It gets worse.

Even if everything goes according to plan and your beer money grows from $520 in 2019 to $1,262 in 2049, you’ll need to sell $1,262 worth of your investments to get the cash for your beer. That will trigger a $750 taxable gain, and at a 25% federal and state tax, you'll have to pay approximately $188 in taxes. Your beer money is now approximately $1,074. This only buys you 44 six-packs of beer in 2049, whereas you were consuming 52 six-packs in 2019.

In other words, due to inflation and the taxation of nominal gains, you’ll be poorer, with a lower standard of living, thirty years from now.

This bears repeating: A 3% pre-tax return on your investments will not preserve, let alone grow, your current standard of living. [Read more…]

Inside jobs: What do people do all day?

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Last week, I found myself revisiting the fantastic Inside Jobs project from The Atlantic. Atlantic staffers interviewed 103 American workers from all walks of life. The magazine then collected those interviews into a single, unified website.

Here's how one of the project's leaders describes her aims:

So much of my aspiration for this project was to hear from people affected by the realities that business writers so often cover: what it's like to be a minority in a workplace, or the challenges of working parenthood, or the struggle to remain relevant as an industry changes. And we succeeded in finding those types of stories — for example, the three female lawyers who started their own firm, or the coal miner who is adapting to the focus on clean energy.

The ones that most stuck with me most were the people in the jobs many consider mundane, such as the janitor who so acutely equated people's respect for his job with their ability to throw away their own trash, or workers outside of the traditional economy, such as the stay-at-home mother who struggled to find her place in a feminist movement that emphasizes women’s professional achievements.

The Inside Jobs website has a fun layout. Each interview has its own page. From the main index, you can filter stories by subject, or filter workers by industry, age, or other demographic factors. Or, if you're like me, you can simply scroll down and click on any of the 103 worker portraits to read a random interview.

Inside Jobs

What Do People Do All Day?

The Inside Jobs project reminds me of one of my favorite books from childhood, Richard Scarry's classic What Do People Do All Day? I've always been fascinated by the vast variety of work available to people, and how different each job is from every other job. Sure, there's a degree of sameness, but there are tons of differences.

  • As a blogger, I sit at home all day and write. In a way, it's like I'm an artist (but without any sort of actual artistry). Everything about Get Rich Slowly comes from me. If I don't work, nothing happens here. (Actually, this isn't quite true anymore. Nowadays, Rachel manages social media and Tom is handling business development.)
  • This process is similar to the one faced by my friends who are entrepreneurs or professionals. When you own your own business, it's up to you to make it succeed. When you have your own accounting firm or law office, it's up to you to build your reputation and client base.
  • Then there are folks like my girlfriend Kim, who works as a dental hygienist. Whereas I see nobody all day long, she sees tons of new patients every day she works. Her work is physically demanding; mine is not.
  • I have other friends who are band teachers and forensic chemists. I know engineers and salesmen and psychiatrists. I know lost of financial planners, of course, as well as factory foremen and county bureaucrats and hospital administrators.

It's just like Richard Scarry taught me when I was a pre-schooler: Everyone is a worker.

Everyone Is a Worker

And it's just like Brenda Ueland taught me (in a book about writing, of all places): Everyone is talented, original, and has something important to say. It’s the personal histories that make up history (by which I mean the grand tapestry of world events). Without your story — and mine — the larger story doesn’t exist. The mass movements of kingdoms and cultures are built on our backs.

Maybe that's why I like oral histories so much.

Speaking of which, the Inside Jobs project naturally reminds me (and many others) of the work of journalist Studs Terkel. [Read more…]

J.D. on the Adulting podcast: Learn to control what you can control

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While tidying up and decommissioning my old Money Boss website, we found a couple of treasures that deserve to be shared here at Get Rich Slowly. This is one of them.

A couple of years ago, I was a guest on the excellent Adulting podcast. Although targeted specifically at young adults, this show has great info for everyone who feels like they need help being a grown-up. (I fall into that category, and I'm nearly fifty!)

In this episode, I spoke with hosts Miranda Marquit and Harlan Landes about taking charge of your life, choosing to control what you can control.

Adulting Podcast: Control What You Can Control

Podcast: Play in new window | Download

When I was younger, I let life happen to me. I wasn't necessarily happy about my situation, but I didn't do anything to change it. I had this idea that I was simply unlucky, that nothing good ever happened to me.

From the podcast:

In time I came to understand — and this didn't happen overnight — that I was in a lot more control of my situation than I believed I was. I was just allowing life to happen to me. If you just allow life to happen to you, then you're going to get whatever life happens to dish up. Sometimes that'll be good, but a lot of times it's just going to be indifferent. It's not going to be good or bad. But it's not going to be what you want.

What I didn't realize then (but I know now) is that I am the one responsible for determining my future. It's not up to god or luck or fate. It's up to me. If I want good things to happen, I have to make them happen. (Or, at the very least, I have to take steps to increase the likelihood that they'll occur.)

I truly believe that becoming proactive is the number-one secret to wealth, freedom, and happiness. At the same time, you can't control everything.

Later in the podcast, we talked about how to handle bad breaks:

Bad things are going to happen. Bad things happen to everybody. We can't control when bad things are going to happen or which bad things are going to happen. But what we do have control over is how we react to the things that happen to us. We get to choose our response…

When something crappy happens to us, we can choose if our response is also going to be crappy or whether we're going to find some way to make the most of it, to find some meaning in it.

Reinhold Niebuhr's famous serenity prayer captures this idea perfectly: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”

There's a lot of great stuff in this podcast, including one last point I'd like to mention. It's a new idea to me, one I haven't written about before.

In life, there are often default options. If you don't consciously and deliberately choose something different, you get the default. Most people live their lives in default mode. They accept the default without question.

My aim for myself — and for you, the readers of Get Rich Slowly — is to both be aware of the defaults and to question them. Sometimes they're fine. A lot of times, however, there are better ways to live. As boss of my own life, it's up to me to reject the defaults when they're at odds with who I am or want to become.

As boss of your life, it's up to you to do the same.

Time is more valuable than money

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It's a GRS tradition! Each year on Halloween, I publish a story about planning for death. Usually these are general articles about estate planning. This year's story is personal.

When my best friend died in 2009, one of my biggest regrets was that I hadn't made time to travel with him.

Sparky had previously asked me to join him on trips to Burning Man (in 1996) and southeast Asia (in 1998) and Mexico (in 2003). I'd declined each invitation, in part because I was deep in debt but also because I thought there'd be plenty of time to do that sort of thing in the future.

Turns out, there wasn't plenty of time to do that sort of thing in the future.

After Sparky died, I resolved to make the most of opportunities like this. Being in a better financial position helped. Having ample savings gives me the flexibility to join friends on short adventures or to explore the U.S. by RV for fifteen months without money worries. (Yes, I realize that's a fortunate position to be in.)

Here's an example. In 2012, my cousin Duane asked me to join him for a three-week trip to Turkey. Remembering my vow after Sparky's death (and remembering the power of yes), I agreed. That trip to Turkey is one of the highlights of my life so far. I'm glad I did it. It was worth every penny.

The Best Laid Plans

Early in 2017, Duane contacted me. “This fall will be the five-year anniversary of our trip to Turkey,” he said. “Want to have another big adventure?”

“Sure!” I said. So, we started planning.

We bought books, watched videos, and browsed websites. We invited Kim to join us. Over the course of several months, our plans crystalized. We'd fly to Paris, rent a car, then spend three or four weeks driving around France and Spain and Portugal, enjoying festivals, experiencing the grape harvest, and exploring ruins. (Duane loves ruins!)

Europe 2017 Planning Map

In June of last year, I sent Duane an email. “I'm going to buy plane tickets tomorrow. Do you want me to buy yours?”

“Hold up,” he responded. “We need to talk.” He called me on the phone.

“What's going on?” I asked.

“Well, J.D., it's like this,” he said. “I have cancer. I've been having problems with my throat for a few months, but I thought that was because of indigestion or something. It's not indigestion. I have throat cancer.” [Read more…]

Should you pay off your mortgage early?

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My friend Amy recently wrote with an interesting dilemma. “Should I pay off my mortgage early?” she wonders.

Amy has a high-paying job and has managed to save enough that she could be completely debt-free if she wanted to. And she kind of wants to! But is this the best choice? She's aware that this is a nice problem to have — but it's still a bit of a muddle. She'd like some guidance.

Here's an abridged version of her email:

I'm wondering if you have any advice for me related to paying off a mortgage vs. keeping it for tax purposes.

Here’s the basic rundown: I have 22 years and $103,000 left on a 30-year fixed-rate mortgage at 3.95%. My monthly payment is $668 per month. I will pay about $48000 in interest this year. I pay both my taxes and insurance out of pocket annually.

The past two years, I've made close to a quarter of a million dollars each year, and this year I will likely exceed that amount. This is a wonderful place to be. With no other debt, I'm contemplating whether I should completely pay off my mortgage in one swoop come November when I get my bonus.

I have advice coming from both sides. My accountant warns me against it, as I would have no other write-offs to offset my high income. However the freedom of being DEBT FREE sounds amazing, even if it comes with a high tax bill.

I would love your advice (or the advice of your readers, if this offers an opportunity to share with them).

My stock answer to this question — which I get a lot — has always been: This is a no-lose situation. Deciding whether you should pay off your house is a case where either option is awesome.

Mathematically (and financially), the best choice is almost always to carry the mortgage. However, many people receive a huge psychological boost from not having a mortgage. In other words, this is one of those situations where the smart financial decision and the smart psychological decision aren't necessarily the same.

Although Amy is asking specifically about the tax implications, let's start by examining the Big Picture.

Should you pay off your mortgage early?

The Pros and Cons to Paying Off Your Mortgage

Just so everyone is on the same page, here's a quick look at the pros and cons to paying off your mortgage. There are advantages and disadvantages to both choices. Are certain advantages more important than others? You make the call. [Read more…]