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Ask the Readers: How Much Should I Spend on an Engagement Ring? Print
Friday, 27th April 2007 (by J.D.)This article is about Ask the Readers, Choices, Odds and Ends
Jim N. writes with a question that most frugal young gentlemen eventually face.
How much should I pay for an engagement ring? I realize that the ideal answer is, “Don’t spend a lot on the ring because she shouldn’t need material objects to realize you love her.” I agree, but that’s not very realistic. I want to buy her something very nice that she’ll be proud of, but I don’t know if I should try to pay cash, get a loan from the bank, etc.
This question falls precisely at that point where money decisions meet psychology and emotion.
It’s often said that a man should spend twice his monthly salary on a ring, but I have a strong suspicion that this is a marketing ploy from the diamond industry. (Which brings up another point: there’s no rule that you must give a diamond engagement ring.)
How should you pay for the ring? It’s best to pay cash, of course, but that can be difficult for a young man making his start in the world. And remember: you can often negotiate the price of an engagement ring. (Some people claim that buying an engagement ring is just like buying a car.)
I don’t recall how Kris and I set our budget when we went to buy her ring, but I know that I only spent $350. We were still in college, so this probably did represent twice my monthly salary, but that’s not why we chose it. We chose it because it was the ring that Kris liked best. I promptly charged it to my credit card. (If I were buying an engagement ring today, I would save for it.)
April 27th, 2007 at 5:15 am
Do not take out a loan. The worst thing you can do is start out a marriage with a debt like that over your head.
If you shop around, you can find a good deal. I found my wife’s engagement and wedding rings at a small store for around $700. She gets compliments all the time about it, and she loves it.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:22 am
I think it depends on the girl. I’m aware of the ethical issues diamonds have, and I don’t particularly love diamonds, and I think under $500 is just about right unless the guy in question is super-rich.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:26 am
I bought my finace a very expensive engagement ring a few months ago because I want her to know that she was more important to me than money is.
2 month’s salary is a good starting point, and there is definitely room to negoiate. Diamonds (the big enough ones to be certified) have a list price that is followed all over the world. Vendors can take off 5%, 10% or 20% depending on which country you buy it though.
My Own Millions Blog
April 27th, 2007 at 5:34 am
Can’t really suggest how much to spend, but where to buy is a no-brainer: http://www.bluenile.com
30 day return policy, free shipping, no tax (this can be huge). They even retroactively applied a coupon I found after I made my purchase! The quality was excellent, and the prices can’t be beat.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:35 am
Not speaking to how much one should spend, but rather how to spend that money. My husband spent about 4 months researching diamonds and other gem stones with the assistance of a gemologist. They went to all the high end retail stores and looked at all kinds of rings and stones, etc. Once the gemologist had an idea of what kind and size stone my husband was interested in he had lots of different stones (certified ones) shipped to the gemologist and then the gemologist helped my husband pick out a center diamond. The diamond in my engagement ring is probably twice what my husband could have bought at a retail establishment. Once you have the diamond its easy to buy a ring/mounting. Or you could also do what my husband did and have a jewelry designer design a one of a kind ring to go with the diamond.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:38 am
My wife and I were determined to have a frugal wedding as we had cross-border immigration fees to pay (she’s American, I’m Canadian). We also are fairly private and simple people and did not want a big foofarah over our commitment. So, we picked out an engagement ring together and paid for it out of our savings - it came to $750 approximately. Our wedding rings came from a discount jeweller and cost about $150 total. Frankly, nobody has been able to notice the difference.
As for our wedding, we decided to pay for it ourselves (our parents told us they would prefer to split the cost of our first down payment with us 50/50, rather than pay for wedding costs, so we could afford a full 25% down payment on our first house). We were determined to have a budget wedding that reflected our tastes and wishes. We used my mother-in-law’s fabulous backyard and had my wife’s aunt, an ordained minister, do the ceremony; my wife bought a used wedding dress online and myself and the rest of the wedding party wore suits and dresses we already owned; we were able to borrow a sound system for free and burned our own CDs; and a good friend of my wife’s donated her wedding planning and catering services for substantially reduced prices. We then spent our honeymoon camping in the Olympic Peninsula in Washington state.
The total cost of our wedding and honeymoon was about $3500, paid entirely out of our savings and salaries. My wife and I did not go into a penny of debt to start our new life together, and it has been a great boon for our marriage not to have to worry about unnecessary debt. Of course, we had some substantial lucky breaks and chose to invite only 40 people to our wedding; other couples might not have a choice. But it is possible to save considerably on engagement, wedding, and honeymoon expenses, so long as you are prepared to do what is right for you and your spouse and not worry about having a “proper” wedding - the proper wedding is the one that is most memorable and joyous for you two and your guests!
April 27th, 2007 at 5:54 am
When I proposed to my wife, I gave her a moderately expensive ring that hurt my budget a little, but didn’t break the bank either (avoid borrowing at all costs). Remember, you will be sharing your $ (and a budget) once you get married. Hopefully, you’ve already talked a lot about marriage and $.
On our 15th anniversary (once I was better established), I upgraded her ring. We turned her old engagement ring diamond into a necklace and purchased a completely new set.
This worked very well for us, and we know others that have done the same thing.
April 27th, 2007 at 5:54 am
First, I ditto Jason’s recommendation of bluenile.com if you shop online. We got our wedding rings there and the quality and service are wonderful.
My engagement ring, purchased last year, cost about a week’s salary for my husband, but we’re older and well-established in our careers, so that was still a hefty chunk of change. What made it priceless, however, is that he found a local jeweler who designs the type of rings I love: modern twists on traditional designs. We purchased the stone from him first — a high quality ruby — and then had him create a setting that was personal to us both. The result was an amazing, completely unique ring for a very good price. Additional benefits are that we supported a local business and that the jeweler has been happy to perform maintenance and cleaning since.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:06 am
My engagement ring came from a local rock and gem show–the sapphire from one vendor, the setting from another, the total around $750. My fiance paid with his credit card. (We could have paid cash and saved the sales tax if I’d written a check, but he wouldn’t do that.)
As for budgeting, I think the only guideline he had was my comment one day that my brother (hip-deep in debt and hospital bills) had spent $700 on jewelry for his girlfriend’s Christmas present (they broke up not long after) and he should never spend that much on me except maybe for my engagement ring. He commented later that he’d spent $100 on one previous engagement ring and $1300 for another, so mine was a nice middle-of-the-road.
(Wow, that sounds bad. Um, third time’s the charm?)
April 27th, 2007 at 6:11 am
Please please please read this article: http://www.theatlantic.com/doc/198202/diamond . It’s a fascinating look at the diamond business and why they’re not only a waste of money, but a bad idea in general.
“Have You Ever Tried to Sell a Diamond?
“An unruly market may undo the work of a giant cartel and of an inspired, decades-long ad campaign”
April 27th, 2007 at 6:23 am
When I got married, we had just put a downpayment on a house, so even if I’d wanted an engagement ring it wouldn’t have been feasible. I figure getting an engagement house was the better deal.
I think the main thing is to talk to the person you’re getting engaged to about the engagement ring. If you’re combining finances after you marry, she’s effectively paying for half of it. Maybe she’d prefer something more useful.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:23 am
I bought from bluenile as well. I was very satisfied. I spent $2500 which is about two weeks salary for me right now. The wedding bands cost us about $1300. I paid cash for everything so there was no debt associated with the purchase.
Her parents paid for the wedding. We paid for the jewelery and honeymoon and some of the other expenses. All in all, we spent about $10,000. Her parents spent over $20,000.
It is the biggest and most disgusting waste of money that I have ever been a part of. We now have to worry about having enough money to cover closing costs on a house because we spent that money and her parents are no longer able to help us because they spent the money on the wedding.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:28 am
I also have to recommend bluenile.com for the same reasons mentioned above - top quality products and top notch service. And I haven’t seen better prices anywhere else.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:31 am
Pay cash, upgrade later if you can’t afford what she really wants.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:32 am
If you’re looking to save money on a wedding ring you could always check out Diamond Nexus. They produce manmade diamonds that are pretty much indistinguishable from the real thing to the naked eye, and still have the same hardness and other properties that diamonds do. They sell for around $80 a carat.
Of course some women might object to not having an authentic diamond. Lucky for me though, my girlfriend has very strong moral objections to the diamond industry, and has actually insisted that I not buy here a real diamond when that time comes.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:37 am
My wife and I bought each other gold bands for about $200 each when we got married. We both decided we wanted to save our money to purchase a condo. We have been married for 12 years and my wife sees no need to purchase a diamond.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:41 am
I have a friend that recently married right out of college(commissioned Navy officer, so pay not so high but the job’s not going anywhere) who spent about $25,000 on the engagement ring/wedding band set. I can’t fathom spending that much money on something like that, nor can I imagine anyone that I want to be with comfortable wearing something worth that much on her finger going about daily business every day of the year.
I can picture spending a couple months salary, but no more, as that’s a pretty hefty chunk of change, but seeing as I have no debt, much savings/investments, and am financially secure, it seems like less of a plundge to make. And I’m also comfortable splurging here and there for gifts and special occasions, so this seems to be one of the best times to do that.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:42 am
I got my wife an absolutely gorgeous wooden ring from Dale Randles (artistreewoodart.com) for $50 (they’re more expensive now). It was perfect for us, as we’re not jewelry people. She then got me a matching one, so we both had engagement rings.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:43 am
I just finished buying an engagement ring and the one big thing I learned is to NOT shop at retail outlets for rings. I found a connection through friends to a private jeweler who is selling the diamonds at a very small margin and makes custom designed rings to put them in.
The ring I purchased would have cost me significantly more if I had bought it at a regular jewelry store.
I have seen the rings from bluenile.com and they are nice, but I always have felt that they are pretty generic. My feeling could be unique to me but I really wanted my girlfriend to have a unique piece of jewelery that matched her personality.
Ultimately, buy what you can afford paying cash for. I’ve been saving for this ring for quite a while now in preparation for this. Like John said above, think of your finances after marriage, don’t cripple yourself now because you want to get her a big rock.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:49 am
My engagement ring cost us nothing - because it was my great-grandmother’s ring. She passed away a few months before we got engaged, and I asked my grandmother (her daughter) how she would feel about letting us have the ring - she was very happy and excited about it and now I get to tell everyone who compliments my ring about my spunky cool great-gram.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:53 am
im 23. engaged for 2 months. the ring was $8900. custom plat setting. 1.3 ct center. .25 side pairs. h&a. D-Si1 Clean. definitely the biggest purchase i’ve made ever. but i do have 30k in retirement saving. i do not recommend bluenile.com. even though its better than tiffany’s there are much better places and prices to be had. pricescope.com is a good start to get the 411 on diamonds. gluck dude.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:54 am
I agree with Jason–if you are going to buy a diamond or any traditional jewelry for your ring, use http://www.bluenile.com. After pricing many of the local guys, I found I saved between $500-$1000 on a $2000 ring.
The most important thing, as mentioned, is to talk openly to your fiance about the tradeoffs involved, especially if you would be incurring debt to purchase the ring. If you can get in the habit of talking about debt and major purchases before you get married, you’ll save a lot of time after!
April 27th, 2007 at 6:59 am
My husband and I started taking our personal finances seriously right when we decided to get married. So we’ve done everything frugal. We shopped together for our rings. I ended up getting aquamarine instead of a diamond. My engagement ring was $340, wedding band $100.00 (70% off sale, and my husbands wedding band $240.00.
We’ve been married almost six months. We had quite a bit of CC debt when we combined finances and are interested in getting out of debt not getting more. So, we paid for our modest wedding (including rings) for about 100 people in cash for 5k (it can be done!) By the time our first anniverasary rolls around we’ll have paid off 12k in credit card debt as well.
Anyway my biggest advice is to talk to her. Find our what your money goals and life goals are. Find out what she’s interested in. If you’re financing (even your not, assuming finances will be combined) the ring she’s paying for it one way or another.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:00 am
Jim N., first of all, congrats!
Second of all, moissanite (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Silicon_carbide) - for the following reasons: the it shines better than a diamond (moissanite is on the left http://www.moissanite.com/images/jfire_show_both.jpg), it’s several times cheaper, it was originally discovered in a meteorite (insert “the moon and the stars” joke here), and you don’t have to wonder if you’re buying a “blood diamond.”
Thus, the question of finances becomes a lot simpler - save up for it.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:01 am
I don’t think there is any set amount that you “should” spend. You should spend what you can afford (paying cash). Why start out in debt over an unnecessary material item?
April 27th, 2007 at 7:02 am
Don’t be like my brother. He spent a small fortune on a ring the girl wanted. They later broke up. He’s stuck with like a $15,000 ring he has no use for. I read about a place on the web where people auction them called idonowidont.com
I’ve never done business with them, but it might be worth looking at.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:06 am
I bought my fiance’s diamond from an estate. After having it checked out by an independent gemoligist, it turned out to be an even better deal than bluenile. Back in the late 70s and early 80s, people tried to buy diamonds as a hedge against inflation. The price exploded for a while, but then the bubble burst. As a result, many of these people just put them in their safe deposit boxes to wait for the prices to come back.
In late 2005, the owner’s son was looking to unload about 10 different sized, GIA certified stones to settle the estate. I ended up with a 1.01 carat, F color, vvs1, round brilliant. As mentioned above, a local trusted jeweler can make a custom setting for the loose stone at a very reasonable price.
I ended up paying about 1 month’s salary when all was said and done. This includes the cost of the stone, the setting, the gemologist plus I sent the stone back to GIA for regrading (it had been graded the first time in 1979). Since I tend to avoid debt, I paid cash for everything. This also helped with negotiating a final price.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:09 am
My wife specifically didn’t want a diamond. They just look pale and cold. So I got her a sapphire. It turns out that the diamond-class gems aren’t really cheaper than diamonds. But she likes her sapphire very much. Paid $500 14 years ago.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:09 am
How much you spend is going to depend on you and you fiance and your relationship with each other, your families and your current finances.
When my wife and I got engaged I was still a student and she was still applying for her first teaching job (and doing a fill in low paid job). Taking twice our combined monthly income wouldn’t have got a (decent) diamond. Also neither of us are particularly ‘flashy’ people, and neither of our families expected a traditional wedding (so not have a big diamond engagement ring wasn’t going cause a family scandal). So in the end we agreed a budget and bought each other rings (around $200 each which combined was more than our food, power, and heating for a month - we ate real basic for a while).
As it happens my wife lost her ring while we were on honey moon - she was devastated, even though it was a cheap ring, because of what it meant / represented. Sometime later I bought her a new ring to replace it, but we agreed to stick to the original budget to remind us of the how we’d struggled back then (her idea not mine).
But it’s all got to fit together with your combined view of getting married, your families, etc, etc. Plenty of our friends went with the twice monthly salary route (and the antaganist in me could help but ask if their fiance spent twice her monthly salary on an engagement present, stereo, tv, season ticket on him), another had a family heirloom ring to use, one didn’t bother with engagement rings (just wedding bands) and one other aren’t getting married at all.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:11 am
I hadn’t planned to propose, so I didn’t have a ring when I asked her to marry me. We both shopped the night I asked, and only shopped the 6 jewelry stores in the mall. She was looking for the ring she wanted … and then we factored in price. Fortunately, she’s got frugal tastes. We found “The Ring”, negotiated the price a bit and got 0% financing for 12 months. Total cost of the ring was $1,300.
We went back to the same shop for our wedding bands. Hers was an add-on to the engagement ring, mine was a straight forward titanium band. Again we got 0% financing for 12 months, and because we were repeat customers, they came down a bit in the price. The bands were about $450, total.
We were engaged in May of 2005, married in October 2006.
Good luck!
April 27th, 2007 at 7:11 am
Not only are diamonds ridiculously overpriced, they are coming under increasing competition from rapidly improving man-made diamonds. So if you go and blow two months’ salary on an engagement ring, you’ll buy a rock that can be cheaply manufactured.
Show your bride that you’re not an idiot: give her a pubic zirconium. She’ll love you for it.
Put the two months’ salary into index funds. Let it grow into a down payment on a house or something useful.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:19 am
I can’t believe nobody has offered up the most economical AND emotional solution of all - use an heirloom ring.
If you’re under 40 you were likely born into a smaller family than in most of history, improving your chances of having a parent, grandparent or great-grandparent with a ring they’d probably be thrilled to pass down.
I realize everyone is different but I can’t imagine choosing to spend my life with someone who wouldn’t be honored to wear a ring passed down from a loved one.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:22 am
My husband and I decided to go to pawn shops and jewelry stores that carry estate jewelry. We found a lovely one that didn’t break the bank. I realize this is NOT the way 99% of the women out there want to get their ring but for me, jewelry isn’t my hang up. I was proud to wear whatever ring he wanted to put on my hand because in my mind, taking his name was a greater public statement of commitment. Just in case you wanted to hear a completely different method of finding that giant rock.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:22 am
Nothing to do with the original question, but for those people concerned with the ethical issues, look into Canadian diamonds.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:26 am
Anyone had any experiences with Costco rings/jewelry? I’ve heard they have great quality and prices.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:27 am
I went with a couple months salary, loaned at no interest. I knew my debt service timeline and knew I could afford it and pay it off quick enough.
Go bluenile.com. You can get a prettier ring for much less of the cost from brick and mortar stores. We went with a slightly colored ring with a strong florescence and ideal cut to cause it to be more brilliant.
Then again I picked out the ring and stone and proposed with it on the sly, something few men appear to do anymore.
There is a site I cannot find right now for men reselling the rings from engagements that failed. They have some great deals, and you’re helping a guy out.
–Michael
April 27th, 2007 at 7:28 am
I spent a couple thousand on the engagement ring for my wife. I went to Kay and was able to pay half in cash. The other half was no-interest for a year. It was perfect because I wanted it to be completely paid for by the time we got married which was a year later. So, I paid zero in interest, spread the cost out over the time, and didn’t head into marriage with a big debt.
Most importantly- I was able to get a great deal on a great ring that fit her tastes and was exactly what she wanted. Another plus is that I was able to continue to establish what has turned into a great relationship with the local Kay jewelery store.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:30 am
From Michael: Then again I picked out the ring and stone and proposed with it on the sly, something few men appear to do anymore.
I 100% agree with this. This is the only way to go. I don’t understand all these people who pick out engagement rings with their soon to be fiances… That just doesn’t ‘ring’ very well with me. It’s supposed to be an expression from the soon to be husband… not something that the soon to be wife had to help you pick out. Great way to start that marriage. the dude’s gotta always ask for help
April 27th, 2007 at 7:32 am
My wife and I also opted out of supporting the diamond industry for some of the reasons listed above. Our simple gold bands were $250 total.
I know of a few ethical diamond mines in Canada that some friends bought through. This might be a good option for the must have diamond.
As a testament to the inflated prices- I had a friend who failed to get even half of the $3000 he spent on a diamond engagement ring when he was forced to sell it.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:33 am
Yes, 2x monthly salary is a marketing ploy.
Whatever you do, don’t go into debt for either the ring or the wedding. Starting off your married life in debt isn’t the way to go.
That isn’t to say that you should start trolling through pawn shops with $100 in your jeans. I got married last year and I spent approximately 3-4 weeks take home on the engagement ring. That still bought something she could be proud of, but didn’t break the bank.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:34 am
I involved my (then to-be) wife in picking the ring, no point in spending money for something she doesn’t like. We went for design and customer service, eventually settling on Stuart Moore (www.stuartmoore.com) in SoHo. We told them how much we had to spend and they spent a lot of time getting stones of various size, color, and quality to fit in our price range. The ring was custom made for her and we covered it (after the deposit I put down) with a loan we took out to pay for the wedding. It ended up running close to $16K, but she loves the ring. We went back to them for our wedding bands as well. All of this advice about “not getting into debt” is a little black and white, if you plan realistically on what kind of debt you can manage, why not splurge for a (hopefully) once in a lifetime purchase. We paid our loan off in 18 months and now have a family heirloom of our own.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:49 am
I’ll speak for the radical nut-jobs:
My wife had been married before. We didn’t even do rings. A friend who got married the same month asked, “How will people know you’re married?” I told her, “If they talk to either of us, they’ll know.”
We’ll celebrate our 15th anniversary next month.
That friend I mentioned… She’s divorced. According to her ex-husband, she missed that whole exclusivity clause in the marriage vows.
I’m not bashing people who buy rings. If it’s important to you, do it. Just make sure you focus on what’s most important, the relationship.
And, since I’m doing the Financial Peace thing at my church, here’s the obligatory “debt is dumb.” Save up and pay cash. Dave Ramsey is right, there’s nothing like slapping down crisp new bills. I even ask the bank tellers for fresh bills if I’m buying something special.
Like I said, I speak for the radical nut-jobs.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:51 am
Go with Blue Nile definitely. I got her engagement ring, and our wedding bands there. The engagement ring was perfect — you get to choose your diamond (do your research, find the best angles, etc.). It was just to our specifications. Perfect.
The wedding bands offered a chance for them to show off their customer service — the first band for me didn’t fit, so we were able to send it back at no cost to us, and get another sent back. Everything at no charge.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:51 am
My wedding set is beautiful! And it came from a pawn shop. I’m completely addicted to pawn shop jewelry.
It’s sad to see all the beautiful antique jewelry that likely belonged to someone’s grandparents and in an act of desperation, they would pawn it.
I like taking old jewelry and giving it new history while daydreaming from time to time about what the real history was behind it.
I’ll NEVER buy jewelry at full price again nor will my husband. He can visit our local shop and get me four times the jewelry at half the price.
I’m one happy girl with a nice full jewelry box.
If you learn what to look for you can really cash in nicely.
April 27th, 2007 at 7:56 am
Even better, don’t get engagement ring! Instead get a tattoo. It’s eternal, and cheaper!
April 27th, 2007 at 8:03 am
My wife and I were never interested in the standard engagement ring ideas. While we were dating, we both got a clear idea of what the other valued in a courting/marriage ritual.
I decided on a titanium engagement ring and wedding bands. The design is interesting enough that we still get interested comments about it four years later.
I think that the statement “I want her to know that she was more important to me than money” forgets the long-term role of the relationship. Obviously, our spouses are very dear to us, but I would add that a long & happy life with our spouse is just as dear. Why not buy small and trade up over the years?
April 27th, 2007 at 8:09 am
I think the MOST important thing is to talk to your fiancee-to-be about what she wants. My wife of 10 years and I decided at the time to forego the ring and instead got a CAT. Of course, we now joke that when the cat dies, she gets her ring. Over the life of the cat, we probably will have paid as much as the ring, but the $25 we spent at the SPCA at the time was money we had. Meg the cat has been a wonderful addition to our lives. I think when Meg does die, we’ll probably go the way of the articificial diamond, rather than pay the ridiculous price of a real one.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:12 am
I’m in the minority, but I have no intention of ever wearing an engagement ring. The ethical issues are a major concern, of course.
But honestly?
I have short fingers, and don’t think two rings would look nice. So I wouldn’t want more than the wedding band.
I think it’s likely that your girlfriend feels differently, but it might be worthwhile at least asking her how she feels about jewelry. (If you can’t bear the thought of “spoiling the surprise,” ask her close friends.)
Then you can decide how you want to proceed.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:17 am
Probably you’ve already talked about this stuff, but not every girl cares about the ring, and not every girl wants a diamond. It may also be more meaningful to wear a ring that’s been in her family or in yours. (My husband bought me a ring after I proposed to him, but if he hadn’t, I’d have worn my grandmother’s ring instead.)
Many couples I know didn’t have an engagement ring at first, but got one years later as an anniversary gift. If you’re young and poor, you have so many better things to spend your money on.
Anyhow, here’s an idea. Figure out what you can afford out-of-pocket, and if it’s not a lot, use that money to buy a SETTING. Put an affordable stone in it, like a synthetic sapphire. (They cost almost nothing, and are gorgeous.) Later, when you can afford it, you can choose to “upgrade” the stone.
Personally, I’ll never upgrade. My setting came from here, and between the striking setting and the deep blue sapphire I get tons of compliments:
http://boonerings.com/stone.htm
I second the comments about not wanting to support the diamond cartels. Synthetic diamonds may be a better option for you … but that’s a topic for another day.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:18 am
I would suggest dimondsonweb.com, I recently bought mine there, If you get a signature diamond you get 1/2 price on the ring and mounting, and a free appraisial (great for insurance). But once again this is your call on what to spend, I went all out (by my standards) and spent a little more then i should, but everytime someone looks at or asks about the ring, I get complimented and she smiles ear to ear.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:21 am
Try vintage! Avoid the messy question of conflict diamonds, don’t encourage more strip mining and maybe even save a little money! Plus, vintage jewelry has that wonderful “storied” feel to it.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:23 am
Something from the woman’s perspective… before my husband bought the ring, I made it very clear to him that I wanted a sapphire and not a diamond. They are rarer than diamonds and don’t line the pockets of the diamond cartel. He got me a 2.5 carat sapphire ring for a fraction of the price a diamond would cost and I get compliments on it all the time. My point is - an engagement ring is a very personal thing to a woman adn you should get her something she likes and wants to wear. If she is the type of woman that wants something beyond your means, you may want to reconsider marriage as this will translate to other issues later.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:30 am
I did not want a diamond engagement ring at all. I also can’t imagine my husband spending that much money on any type of jewelry, but then I am very practical. I asked for jade because of the history of it and he gave me a beautiful one of a kind jade ring that his mother owned.
The diamond industry is bogus.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:31 am
Anything that you spend alot of money on you should research first and educate yourself on so that you know what you’re doing.
Read the pricescope.com forums. Those guys are knowledgeable and you will not only learn about diamonds, but also the price/quality/beauty trade off. There’s actually a pretty good price performance benefit of getting an SI1 or 2 gem with a less clear color rating. Where you are getting an incredible stone that looks magnificent, for a very affordable price. Become a diamond expert. Your significant other will appreciate that you spent so much time hunting for the right stone and that you know exactly what you’re doing that she will trust what stone you decide to get. I did this and the stone I picked out was most appreciated, and I have the peace of mind knowing that I didn’t overspend, and got a good deal.
Sidenote: don’t buy from a mall jeweler, nor a chain jeweler. My best friend works in a diamond store in here in Atlanta. The markups are crazy high, and no matter what kind of a ‘deal’ you get, the dealers are still making money. For example a 1.01 carat F color, VS1, princess cut diamond with a 1.0 L:W ratio that has Ex/Ex polish/symmetry might have a sticker price of 10k. They will target to sell at 8k. They won’t let it go for less than 6k. At 6k they’re still doubling their investment (cost is $3k). The list price tends to be in the ballpark of 3x the average cost (this is a rule of thumb, additionally diamonds are bought in batches/bulk typically).
The point is, do research, and find something that fits your budget. DO NOT try to fit your budget to a stone that you ‘fall in love with’, that’s just dumb and irrational. pricescope.com. Go there.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:33 am
I’m not a very materialistic person (except for computer gear and gadgets I suppose) so I never understood wanting to spend thousands of dollars on a piece of jewelery. Even if it’s supposed to impress your girlfriend. To me, the ring and even the wedding aren’t the important parts, it’s the relationship.
I bought my wife a pretty white gold /silver ring with no stone from one of the Indian jewelery places here in Albuquerque. I think it cost $60, reduced from $80 when the owner asked me what it was for, and it got the job done just as well as any X-thousand dollar diamond job. She loved it, but mostly loved the sentiment and commitment it represented. When I hear stories of women basically demanding expensive diamonds (my wife has a friend whose girlfriend made him return the $2000 ring he’d bought and buy a $3500 ring because she didn’t like the original one) I just feel sorry for both of the people in the relationship. If you can’t get married without spending double your paycheck on a engagement ring (which she might not ever wear again after the wedding), you need to reexamine your priorities.
Even without looking at the moral problems with diamonds and the fact that the diamond’s connection to marriage is a marketing scam, there’s no reason at all to spend a ton of money on rings.
Even for our wedding rings, we bought matching titanium rings from the awesome Statman Designs for $350 each (I think) and love them. I wouldn’t redo or rethink how I did the rings for anything.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:34 am
Oh, and get them to kick the band in for free.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:43 am
Others have mentioned loose stones and pawn shops, but here’s another option, especially if you’re of Irish heritage: Claddagh rings.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:46 am
Definitely, definitely ask your girlfriend what her desires are. If you want it to be a total surprise, then ask relatives and friends and really THINK about what her desires are.
If you get her a fake diamond, her reaction might be less, “Oh, give me a kiss, you financially savvy hunk!” and more like, “I can’t believe you’re so cheap. Did you think I wouldn’t notice?”
Then again, if you go all out and get her a 3-carat center stone with pave diamonds all around the band, her reaction might be less, “Oh, your love is so extravagant, I feel so special!” and more like, “Don’t you know that we could have spent that money on a new computer?”
That 2-months-salary business is garbage. Just forget it. My fiance put it like this: “That’s not a display of love, that’s a display of power.”
~Q
April 27th, 2007 at 9:07 am
The whole diamond thing is garbage. How does my love for my fiance mean more or less if I buy her a big piece of carbon that could be better manufactured in a lab?
When my fiance and I were engaged, we went shopping for a ring together. We made our decision based on what we both loved and what meant the most to us, not cost or size.
Another couple I know chose to forego the whole ring thing and put the money away towards a downpayment on their first house. That meant a lot more to them than a ring.
GJ
http://www.60in3.com
April 27th, 2007 at 9:09 am
don’t fall for the 3-4 months salary hype!
———————————-
i had a discussion about this with one of my lady friends a couple of years back.. she said when she gets married.. she wants at least a 2 carat minimum.. 3 carat preferred!
are you kidding me!? i don’t see myself spending 20k on a damn ring.. when you can use that for a down payment on a home
her reasoning was that it’s the only piece of jewelry she’ll wear for the rest of her life so she wants it to be worth something.. she said she’d rather have the nice ring rather than an expensive wedding if she had a choice
yet and still.. if a woman really loves me.. the price and size of the rock shouldn’t matter
i still wear the $100 ring my high school sweetie gave me years ago.. that’s worth more to me than a big ass diamond!
April 27th, 2007 at 9:11 am
Well, you could always spend the same amount on a diamond engagement ring as you do for her leg manacle.
Okay, that was not helpful, but consider what the impetus is to buy/wear a ring and the historical context. A ring does symbolize ownership and I think that is an archaic notion that needs serious consideration before just jumping on the “buy her a diamond” marketing bandwagon. If you must have rings, consider buying something made locally with a local, sustainably mined gem. What! No diamond mines near your house? Maybe rings aren’t the way to go then. Good luck with your decision.
April 27th, 2007 at 9:11 am
I would definitely not take a loan out for buying a ring but I would definitely spend a decent amount on one. A couple months salary could be a bit much but maybe one month?
April 27th, 2007 at 9:22 am
I would say spend as much as you want to, but stay out of the stores. When it came time for me to buy an engagement ring I found a custom designer and he and I worked out a price and he is making sure I get the ring of our dreams. In addition, we are supporting a local artist and I can be sure that he is getting materials from ethical sources.
His site is http://www.jameshuntdesigns.com/
April 27th, 2007 at 9:22 am
I picked up one of the giant 3 foot tall piggy banks, it was a Capt Morgan bottle. I told myself I wouldn’t ask her to marry me until I had filled it up to help pay for the rings. All of my change from every purchase I made and misc bills when into the bottle. It took me a year, but when I finished counting I had $1400. About $800 in change and $600 in cash.
The money almost covered the cost of both her rings and the year of saving for it made me take the time to really think about what we were doing. It wasn’t the most efficient method, but it worked really well.
-Tim
P.S. There were also a few times where it was a great stress reliver to go out to the bank and get a roll of quarters just so I could go home and add some more to the bottle.
April 27th, 2007 at 9:27 am
JR post #54 is right. pricescope.com will help you be a diamond expert. i bought my ring for $9k and was appraised for $17k. yes, i know its just a ring and spending so much on something to look at isn’t wise. i don’t regret one bit, since i can afford it, i paid cash and saved up for it. best advice, spend what you are comfortable spending. but don’t be so cheap either, afterall, you want to make her happy.
April 27th, 2007 at 9:38 am
This may not help, but will give you an idea of how wedding rings are done in other parts of the world.
My first husband and I followed a tradition common in many European nations — instead of an engagement ring separate from the wedding ring, we bought one ring which I wore on my right hand until the wedding, when it was switched to the left. We liked linking to this European tradition and feeling a part of our heritage.
Also, I didn’t want a traditional diamond ring so we went with a sapphire surrounded by diamonds. Needless to say, neither one of us was a traditionalist. We both liked to be creative with things.
April 27th, 2007 at 9:50 am
I was looking at giving my wife a ruby engagement ring, but in my search my dad offered me my mother’s engagement ring - the same ring that was given to my grandmother. We want to keep it in the family and start a tradition to pass it on to my future son as well.
It’s free, it’s unique, and it’s an older ring - one with a good history, and a good story.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:00 am
I would say, spend as much as you have to to get something durable. Like some of the other commenters, I don’t particularly care for diamonds, not only because of the ethical issues (although that is a factor), but simply because there are much prettier stones available. If you want to check out some more ethical jewelry (at only slightly higher prices), go to http://www.greenkarat.com. They use lab-created precious stones and recycled metal and diamonds in all their jewelry. Personally, I think the lab-created diamonds are prettier than the natural ones (and they’re cheaper).
April 27th, 2007 at 10:02 am
What Don said! When my now-fiance and I started talking about marriage I told him under no circumstances should he buy a ring because my family had at least one heirloom ring that they intended me to have. As it turned out, he ended up surprising me with a ring from his grandmother.
Diamonds are forever. People are not. Do the math.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:18 am
I have been hinting at my man for a ring (I am a woman, the nick is deceiving). I ask for one of:
1) Reuse my old ring that was damaged in a cement and wheelbarrow accident
2) A ring from a crackerjack box
3) A cheap & simple non diamond platinum ring
Actually, the posts above bring up a good question - what does a woman ask for if she doesn’t want to purchase an extra ring, especially a diamond ring but only want the wedding band? Hmmm.
April 27th, 2007 at 10:23 am
FWIW, this Atlantic article is an old (I’d really like to know what happened next) but engrossing expose of the diamond business’s marketing schemes:
Have You Ever Tried to Sell a Diamond?
(via Blueprint for Financial Prosperity, a while ago now…)
April 27th, 2007 at 10:52 am
My engagement/wedding ring is a diamond from my husband’s great-aunt’s ring. It’s a beautiful stone from the 20s, much nicer than anything we could have afforded new when we got married. We had it set directly on my wedding band. The old setting was beautiful, but a) people had MUCH smaller fingers in the 20s; and b) after having been worn for 50 years or so, the back of it was nearly worn through.
We had a very frugal wedding–I bought a truly awful dress and we ran off to a little vacation town in the next state. I don’t think we ended up charging anything on our credit cards, because we had set up a separate savings account for wedding stuff and I had just inherited a couple thousand dollars.
Every year on my anniversary (and every time I accidentally catch parts of Four Weddings and a Funeral) I do wish we had done it up just a little more; friends and family would have been nice, and I would love to have had a gorgeous dress and big pink roses, and gotten married in my hometown. My husband would have been fine with that, but at the time I had just been to several expensive weddings and had observed that in many cases the happiness of the marriage seemed to be inversely proportional to the amount the couple spent on the wedding, so I was adamantly opposed to having a big fancy wedding. We’ve been exceptionally happy over the last 13 years, so maybe there’s something to that, but I still covet those damned cabbage roses.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:06 am
Okay, now that we’re reminiscin’…my weddings (I was widowed from my first hubbie) were both very frugal, too. My first dress cost $120 from JCPenney, was very flattering in its simplicity, and I got lots of compliments on it. My second dress was made by a seamstress friend who donated her services and was gorgeous yet also simple. Both times we focused on ways to have fun with our friends and family while honoring the spiritual element of the events. I wasn’t nearly as stressed out as many brides are because the emphasis was on fun, not impressing people.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:44 am
We used an heirloom ring passed down to my wife through her family. Of course I was unemployed at the time so free really was twice my salary.
April 27th, 2007 at 11:57 am
There is no more stupid purchase than jewelry, in my opinion. My husband got the wedding bands and we have worn them since we eloped. My ring is really the only jewelry I wear.
All that said, I used to work at Blue Nile. They are nice there.
April 27th, 2007 at 12:09 pm
NEGOTIATE! NEGOTIATE!
My partner and I wanted matching wedding bands that would look good with our very different engagement rings (we both did rings; I gave her a family ring).
After trying on dozens, before talking about budget, the only one we liked was $1200. While I do think it’s worth splurging on a piece of jewelry you plan to wear EVERY DAY for the rest of your LIFE, no way could we afford that much.
I had a work trip to NYC coming up, and went to the diamond district while I was there. We decided that we could afford a total of $1200 for both of us.
In the 3rd or 4th store, I found rings very similar to the one we’d liked.
Salesman: That’s $900.
Me: What kind of price could you give me for 2 identical?
Salesman: If you buy 2, I could give them to you for $590 each.
Me: Sold.
April 27th, 2007 at 12:13 pm
Incidentally, the $1180 for our wedding bands is included in our budget of $8k for a lovely wedding and reception for 110 people.
April 27th, 2007 at 12:52 pm
It pays to know a jeweler. When I decided to propose, I talked to my friend who gave me the ring at whole sale price. The markup on Jewelry is ridiculous.
I’d also add that it can help to have a wife the doesn’t care about jewelry. My wife actually asked me NOT to get her a big diamond. She didn’t see the reasoning behind me spending so much $$ on a material thing..
April 27th, 2007 at 1:11 pm
As a few mentioned, PriceScope.com should be the start and end of your diamond search. Their search engine covers many dealers and their forums are second to none. When I ended up taking mine to the appraiser, he couldn’t believe that I paid less for the diamond than he could on the NY Diamond Exchange. Yet he certified that it was indeed real and matched the certificate. The guys at Abazias took care of me, but I had a friend who had as good luck with UnionDiamond and others in the pricescope forums.
April 27th, 2007 at 1:36 pm
I second the Moissanite suggestion. My roommate just got engaged and her moissanite ring is BEAUTIFUL. Can’t even tell it’s not a real diamond.
And if you’re the type who likes huge stones, you can get 2-3 carats of moissanite for the price of half a carat of diamond.
April 27th, 2007 at 1:39 pm
In the old days i.e. pre WWI, engagement rings weren’t necessary. My father taught me that there is no point in buying bad gems and that it’s better to buy nothing at all. So if you have to have a ring to keep the butterflies from landing on you, just get a stainless steel wedding band for $29 from Amazon.com.
My answer: $500 is too much money! You’ll never be able to sell it for that much anyway so just go with the $29 rustproof surgical steel option.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:06 pm
I have an absolutely wonderful wife. According to our religious traditions, any sort of jewelry was optional. So, since I had access to a family heirloom diamond (and since my fiance’ had explicitly asked for a smaller stone), we had it set in a ring for her and got a matching band (sans stone) for me. I think the total was about 2 weeks wages for me … or somewhat less. And I had a crummy job at the time.
We are married to each other, not the jewelry. We take a dim view of expensive rings and short marriages.
Our focus is on the marriage and we don’t try to measure our commitment to each other on an accountants ledger sheet. Six years later, so far, so good.
Frankly, even if I had a ton of money, if a woman was not willing to accept a small ring as a token of a larger commitment, I think I’d keep looking.
She gets a steady stream of small gifts from me … and will for as long as I can give them. But we walked away from our wedding with each other, not half a jewelry store.
Bill
April 27th, 2007 at 6:08 pm
How much to spend is a personal decision and it does depend on what the ring symbolizes to the couple. Definitely the best thing to do is to pay cash. The second best thing to do is to take out a personal loan with a 12 month or shorter payoff schedule so that by the time the marriage begins the ring is not still a debt.
April 27th, 2007 at 6:48 pm
You know I was just looking at watches with a cheapskate when it comes to me (as in why did you spend $8 on a cooking spoon?) and he doesn’t want anything less than a $1700 watch. How many “generous” fiances begrudge springing that much for an engagement ring but have no problem with a “decent” $2000 watch or an adequate $2000 tv/stereo system. It’s really about perspective when affordability is not the issue.
April 27th, 2007 at 8:53 pm
The answer is simple: you should spend however much your significant other expects you to spend.
Personally, I favor proposing via a cheap ring, and then saving the money for the actual wedding rings, and not having a lengthy engagement.
And not spending money on natural diamonds.
April 27th, 2007 at 9:43 pm
As Allie’s lucky husband, I feel fortunate we avoided the formal wedding entirely. We have titanium/sterling silver wedding bands which I think cost perhaps $300 for the pair. We had them custom made out of New Zealand, of all places.
People should spend whatever they want, of course, but as someone noted above, you’d be super foolish to choose between a fancy wedding/jewelery and a down payment on a house, if you couldn’t do both.
The most beautiful (and expensive) traditional ceremony I went to ended with divorce six months later (!)–imagine how that must feel to see that $100K flushed away.
The other thing to keep in mind is that jewelery has essentially zero resale. Have you noticed that ALL used ring and other trinket ads say “appraised at $xxx, sell for $xxx/2″ or even less? It’s like wedding dresses–spend the money if it pleases you but don’t expect to ever see it again. Or for your daughter to want to wear it.
April 28th, 2007 at 2:57 am
When we first talked about getting engaged I said I wanted amethyst in my ring because it is the stone I wear the most. However I could not find a ring I liked and told my boyfriend that I would rather not have an engagement ring than one I did not love.
In the end I did find one I loved which was about 50 years old and was being sold in the independent jewellers who had originally made it. However it was significantly more than I expected my boyfriend to pay so I told him that I was willing to contribute towards a ring if it meant I got one I love.
About a year later he surprised me by buying the ring I’d seen earlier and I paid for half of it.
We had a wedding ring made to fit around the shape of the diamonds which was a bit more expensive. However we saved some money because my husbands ring was made from scrap stainless steel in a friend’s workshop.
April 28th, 2007 at 9:11 am
Before I met my wife, I said I didn’t want to spend more than $500 on a engagement ring. I always thought diamonds were simply, compressed carbon. But all my friends said when I met the girl of my dreams, I will want to buy her the world. I told them that I will find a girl who doesn’t want a silly expensive ring. My friends thought I was silly.
So when I met the woman of my dreams, she thought how I thought, and the engagement ring cost me $18.36 and took me 5 minutes to pick out. She absolutely loved it, and it is perfect. Our wedding bands are similar and are a simple band of titanium. About $250 for both.
That was it. We then spend two weeks on our honeymoon. Buying an expensive ring, to me, is silly. Spend the money on something that will last a lifetime, like memories from a vacation. Or save it for retirement. If the girl wants an expensive ring for status or something like that, what will she want in ten years? Will she want an expensive car or house, or will she want to spend time with you?
IMO, the only reason anyone wants a diamond is because everyone is told they want a diamond. I think it is more special to buy something with meaning, rather than with value. Just my two cents (pun intended).
April 28th, 2007 at 7:32 pm
I actually like the idea that if you are young or strapped for cash, you should not buy an expensive ring from the start. Think about buying a really nice band and a cubic zirconia at first, with the promise of replacing it with a diamond in ‘x’ years. That way you can have something pretty and you can set a budget for the future goal.
Saving for a Wedding
April 28th, 2007 at 11:14 pm
My wife and I have been married going on 8 years now, and neither one of us have ever bought the other a ring. My wife says she’ll kill me if I ever buy her a diamond.
I guess we’re an odd couple though. We actually did cancel the wedding and spend the money on the honeymoon instead. My parents didn’t like this. I do understand their desire to see their child get married, but it was not their decision to make.
We’re just not into jewels. We did, on the other hand, buy a $3000 hand made canoe. The romance that it has brought to our lives far out-weighs what we would have gotten from any ring.
But with that said, to each their own. A really nice canoe does it for us. If an expensive ring brings fulfillment to your lives, then that is what you should get. How much should you spend? Enough to get the fulfillment you are after (recognizing that fulfillment can be reversed by financial strain.)
April 29th, 2007 at 7:53 am
The most important point in my opinon is that the diamond fit proprotionately with the finger. Anything more than a carat is just plain gawdy, they begin to look like cheesy, trinket jewelry that grandma wears out to parties. Proportionate size is more important than $$. But if you decide to shell out more, put it toward quality, a smaller VVS1 (very very slight inclusion) color D .56 point will always be more impressive than an I2 color H 1.5 carat stone. Ask a jewelry to put them side-by-side and the choice is obvious. Too often I’ve seen men buy large diamonds because they don’t want to appear cheap or they feel the need to impress.
April 29th, 2007 at 10:11 am
I sell engagement rings (and I bet reply #4 does too) I agree in general with a lot of the legitimate replies above.
You do not have to spend a fortune to buy something beautiful. Do not go into debt but do remember that one $2.59 coffee a day over the 50 years you will be married comes out to over $45,000. A fine ring is not all that expensive over time.
I am an estate jeweler and I recommend that you look at some of your local antique jewelry stores.
With estate rings you often get a stone and a really nice hand-made mounting for the price of the stone alone or less depending on how the jeweler values the period the ring was made in and what she or he paid for it.
I also agree that other stones make wonderful rings, but I would stick to sapphire and ruby as stones hard enough to take decades of wear and still be there for your grandchildren to wear. Yes, you are getting married and although you are not thinking about it now, you are purchasing an heirloom item of jewelry.
Finally, certification is all well and good but be aware that there is a difference in certs. There is not a well regarded gem lab in the country which will both describe and place a value on a stone. Reputable labs only identify and describe stones.
April 29th, 2007 at 1:03 pm
We got engaged in November of 1993. We got married in Vegas in March of 1997 for under $1000. He surprised me with an engagement ring in 2005!
Moral of the story: Do what is right for you. Rings and ceremonies do not make a happy marriage. We decided to focus on getting through college and buying our first home - and the ring was secondary. He was so proud to present it to me - 12 years after getting engaged and 8 years into a thriving marriage - that I wouldn’t have it any other way.
BTW: He saved his own money and did side jobs to pay for it…no debt!
April 29th, 2007 at 1:47 pm
From experience with my ex-wife and my present girlfriend, I would say price of the ring has absolutely NOTHING to do with the ring. The right ring is the one she likes. It doesn’t matter if you paid a little or a lot, how she feels about it means the most.
I suggest you find a store that has a 30-day return policy. That way, if she doesn’t like the ring, you can get a full refund, or at a minimum, trade it for a ring she does like.
Suprise her with you choice, then let her pick out the one she really likes, and don’t be offended that she likes another one better. At least, you are learning more about her style and she will love you for your flexability and concern for her taste.
April 29th, 2007 at 8:12 pm
I didn’t buy one at all. We spent about $400 on the wedding bands. We were never really engaged, though, We knew we would get married sometime and did. I also didn’t feel like we should delay the wedding ( another $400 or so) until I could afford a nice ring.
On the other hand I almost feel like if you are getting a ring and have to take out a loan, maybe you cant afford to be married. I feel the same way about expensive weddings.
I have a friend who ( combined with his wife) makes way more money than we do. But he had something like a $800/mo ring payment and spent a lot on a wedding. That combined with other spending probably has them barely meeting the minimums and barely getting by.
April 30th, 2007 at 1:10 am
So, Jim N., frugal-soon-to-be-engaged-guy, has any of this helped? You’ve certainly struck a chord with lots of us! My boyfriend is the one who wants to spend money on an engagement ring with diamonds and everything. I think it’s because all of his friends have given their [wives] flash shiny rings. I want something that isn’t going to break if I come off my bike so for me it’ll be a simple titanium band (probably from the same place in NZ as the previous commenter (hard to go past people who had kids in the Olympics)). It will probably be 2-3 grand less than he’s willing to spend. And I had to really talk him round to it! I love the look of a solitaire diamond or lots of little diamonds clustered together but I like it for other people, not for me. I’m in it for the guy, not for what he can buy me. Good luck!
April 30th, 2007 at 6:00 am
We did our research by going to the Natural History Museum and went through their gem exhibit. Julie wrote down what she liked, and then we went to a local, private jeweler. We got some very nice blue sapphires (mine’s a little bigger than hers), with some very lovely custom settings for in total, about 2 weeks of my pay.
I suppose I should mention, ladies, that Julie asked me if I wanted an engagement ring. So we got 2 very nice rings for 2 weeks of my pay, though she paid for mine and I paid for hers. And what’s funny is that we have several friends who are engaged and got the diamonds, yet everyone oohhhs over hers.
April 30th, 2007 at 6:13 am
I’m not really qualified to answer, but that never stopped me before.
I’d think carefully about how much money you’re willing to wear every day.
April 30th, 2007 at 10:28 pm
I think you should go all out for the ring or hit the other end of the spectrum and form a paperclip around one’s finger or maybe a ruberband. You only live once. Fake it till you make it. What else is money for after heat, food, and mortgage?
May 1st, 2007 at 5:11 am
Harvey,
What good does spending for spending’s sake do for you?