#2 is also unquestionable. Giving to others produces great happiness…for both the giver and the receiver.

#3 was a surprise to me, however. I prefer buying quality products to less expensive ones. I find that well-made, beautiful, long-lasting items provide greater satisfaction.

I enjoyed reading all of the comments on this post almost as much as reading the post itself.

But I can’t get bad experience memories to go away! So maybe it’s true on both sides. Good experiences are more valuable and bad experiences linger more painfully.

The research (I guess) doesn’t account for whether you enjoyed the experience or not. I went on a weekend away a few years ago and HATED it. I still have nightmares that I’m stuck there for the weekend. It didn’t make a funny or entertaining story. I just simply sucked. I wish I could undo that decision to go!

It got me thinking, if you were to develop a budget/spending plan/formula that mirrored these guidelines, what would it look like? I’m thinking of something along the lines of the formula JD uses. It would be interesting to see how it compares to other popular budgeting models.

I think the happiness researchers are going too far looking at hedonic happiness vs. eudaimonic well-being. So maybe there should be less Aristippus and more Aristotle.

April, I’ve had buyer’s remorse from more than one holiday so can’t relate to your conclusion. I don’t really remember most of them very well either and don’t reminisce a lot, so I guess they aren’t great happiness areas for me. What’s usually good about them is that you have time with your loved ones with no distractions and nothing else to DO. Do we need to go thousands of miles away to create that state? I don’t think so.

I decided to try and go to the ice cream parlor twice a week and treat myself to just one scoop. Turned out, this was a wonderful thing!! Now I’m walking into town twice a week and enjoy the weather and the walk with my dog and I get to enjoy the wonderful ice cream TWICE a week!!

I’m never going back to 2 or 3 scoops and only have the treat once a week!! I’m loving the spread of the fun!!!

I’m not a biologist or anything, but that can’t be right. Any animal with some sort of social network has got to include unrelated individuals, to avoid inbreeding. I know chimpanzee tribes, for example, will fight one another and steal young females from one another, to expand the gene pool.

Unless you meant that we’re the only species among humans eusocial bugs, and mole rats, in which case forget I said anything, because I’ve no idea if that’s true or not.

A lot of the reason why stuff doesn’t create enduring happiness is because once you own a huge flat screen tv, it becomes the norm and you can’t sustain being excited or happy about it. That giant, sharp, flat TV becomes your baseline, and anything less would reduce your enjoyment.

But in the same way, experiences that are too commonplace lose their magic too. A starbucks coffee is an enjoyable experience, but if you get it every morning, it’s not really one you might notice or enjoy in quite the same way, than if you’d saved it for a once in a while treat.

It’s probably why travel is mentioned so often as an experience – it’s not just an experience, it’s one that’s usually different everytime and therefore continues to provide enjoyment. Any business traveler who goes to Nice every month will tell you their enjoyment is waning with each trip.

Maybe both stuff and experience can bring happiness if the hedonic treadmill factor is kept in mind.
Like starbucks coffee? don’t get it everyday but do get it when you feel like you need a treat.
Like 800 threadcount sheets? Don’t replace all your sheets, just get one set, so when you use it, you really really enjoy it.

My 10 cents

Also, experience doesnt mean travelling to a foreign country. It could just as easily mean holding a backyard birthday party.

According to the three tips, the happiest thing you could do would be to hold several small fundraising events for your favorite cause. Its an experience, not stuff. Its not one big event, its several small ones. And its helping others.

From the Canto V

121 “There is no greater sorrow
122 Than to be mindful of the happy time
123 In misery…”

http://en.wikisource.org/wiki/The_Divine_Comedy/Inferno/Canto_V

@ Chacha – Yes, but I’d argue that even local travel is going too far. We can learn to be happy without going anywhere. It’s a matter of paying attention to the senses and to the present moment wherever you are. Travel may help induce these states, but it’s not required.

Just this morning my house was unusually cold (spring is weird in New Mexico), and we were a little uncomfortable from it. So I made hot chocolate milk, added some cooked barley to it, and poured it into bowls. It was wonderful to sit down with my wife, eat the hot cereal, and warm up with the smell of chocolate and cinnamon and vanilla. For me, happiness is really that simple.

@ Des – ha ha ha ha. Yes! I totally get that. I love watching movies and TV with the missus (not a CIS fan, but I’ve been liking Lie to Me a lot recently). We eat frozen blueberries instead of pizza, but yeah, I totally agree.

Did you know that the protein in the cheese turns into a morphine-like substance in your bloodstream? http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Casomorphin

On top of it, curling up with your husband on a couch will cause a release of oxytocin, aka the “love hormone”. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxytocin

Sounds like a lot of fun! 100% legal high.

Some of the happiest people that I have known are those with the least amount of stuff and experiences (from the American mindset).

Edited to add: Upon further consideration, I guess watching TV *is* an experience. So, then the question is: what is making me happy – the couch, the TV, the party pizza, or the husband?

All of what you wrote about is familiar to me as I specialize in applying the principles of positive psychology to consumer culture and, ultimately, environmental sustainability.

One key point that you mention in passing, which I believe is critical to happiness, is intention. Much research exists, under the rubrick of Self-Determination Theory, that shows a strong correlation between intrinsically motivated activities and happiness, and a strong negative correlation between extrinsically motivated activities and happiness. In other words, if someone spends money for extrinsically motivated reasons (e.g. to impress others, to get rich, to attract attention), then they risk their happiness. If, on the other hand, money is spent in service to intrinsically motivated reasons (e.g. helping others, improving your health, building community), happiness is likely to be improved.

In a broader sense, someone who is primarily motivated to achieve some envisioned material dream will be surprisingly disappointed (you mention Dan Gilbert’s research on this subject). Worse, if their effort to achieve this material vision is long-term, research has shown that they may become disconnected with what truly brings them happiness – this is the reason why so many people who have fallen short of their material ideal report feeling “lost” and apathetic.